The Bucket List
by carolinagirl919
Summary: Takes place after God Mode. After Carter takes Elias, she leaves him with Fusco and skips town to take a vacation. While on vacation she takes time for self reflection, meets a new guy, and writes a bucket list. At the same time, while she's gone all hell breaks loose in NYC. What happens when she returns? Sorry the summary isn't all that great...
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

_(3 days ago)_

He ran his fingers down from the top of her shoulder down the end of her arm and back up to her neck to gently touch her face. The sun rays that came through the French doors of the bedroom gave her a luminous glow and he thought she couldn't be more beautiful. They hadn't known each other a long time, but he felt like he'd known her forever. Although he was attracted to her upon first meeting her, he never thought they would be here lying next to each other after a wonderful night of lovemaking. He never thought he'd feel this way, but he knew he was falling fast.

Joss stirred in her sleep and slowly fluttered her eyes open to see him watching her. Her brown eyes met his green ones and she smiled. "Were you watching me sleep?" She reached up to touch his face and ran her fingers through his sandy blonde locks.

With sleep still in his voice that made his southern accent a bit more prevalent and a bit deeper, he drawled, "Just admiring the view. I'm glad you're awake. I thought I would have to use more creative ways to get you to wake up."

He flashed a smile at her and she smiled back lifting slightly to meet him as he leaned down to kiss her on the lips. "I think the power came back on while we were asleep. I'm going to grab a quick shower and hopefully you'll join me."

"I guess you'll just have to wait and find out," she playfully teased as sat herself up on her forearms.

She watched as he moved out of the bed and decided to 'admire the view' herself. He was handsome, charming, and was in incredible shape. Clearly he worked out and the stamina he had from the night before proved that. She blushed to herself and watched him until he left her line of sight making his way to the bathroom. She heard him start the shower and she threw herself back into the pillows and stared up at the ceiling.

_Why am I here? Why did I write that stupid list and why am I attempting to scratch off each item on that ridiculous list? _She asked herself. She realized that while she was having fun and felt lighter than she had over the past few months, running away and using this man as a distraction wasn't the answer. When she went back home, the problems that she left there would _still_ be there upon her return. If anything, things will probably be in worse shape when she returned. She sighed. At least she didn't have any nightmares last night. She had a dreamless sleep and she was thankful for that.

"Joss! Are you gonna join me or what?" she heard him yell from the shower, tearing her away from her musings. She chuckled to herself and thought, _Why not one more go 'round?_

"I'm coming, Ethan!" she yelled as she got out of the bed and made her way to the bathroom and sauntered her way to the shower. He'd already began to lather up his body and the problems she left in New York City evaporated from her mind as she took in the sight of him. _Good lord, this man is beautiful_ she thought. He looked at her and winked. "Like what you see?" He pulled her in the shower and kissed her passionately as the warm water pulsated down her back.

* * *

_(15 Days Ago)_

Jocelyn Carter was tired. Deep down to the bones tired. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. Her body was still sore from digging up a year old grave over a week ago and the BC Powder she had taken earlier did nothing for her. She was mentally tired from all the lying and cover ups she's had to do to not only cover her and Fusco's tracks, but to also cover the vigilante work of John and Harold. And she was emotionally tired by all the death that was surrounding her.

It had been a week since she'd returned Bear to Finch and immediately got rid of her muddy boots and clothing. The nightmares weren't as vivid anymore, but they were still present. After digging up Stills' body, she went back to work the very next day and focused fully on cold cases and also on Beecher and Szymanski's murders. She'd done anything and everything to keep her mind occupied. But today all she could do was stare at the pile of unfinished paperwork on her desk and knew she wasn't going to get anything done. She felt like she was on autopilot.

There was a reason Joss was working herself to exhaustion. She felt as if- no, she _knew _that she was starting to lose herself. She went from tip toeing the other side of the law to fully crossing the line with everything she did for John when he was locked up at Riker's, to her most recent actions of digging up and moving a dead body to keep Fusco from going to jail and losing his badge.

When exactly had the lines blurred so much? Yes, she was helping people, saving lives and she felt good about that. She once was able to quiet her nagging conscience because she knew she was helping people and preventing murders before they could happen. But these days it seemed like what once worked for her, Fusco, John, and Finch was no longer working. She couldn't help but wonder why they were too late to save Szymanski and Beecher and the victims that had been murdered recently.

_I need a vacation_. She thought to herself. Why not? She hadn't taken any time off in a while and her PTO hours continued to pile up. _Maybe Taylor and I could go to my grandmother's beach cottage in Charleston. That would be fun. Good seafood, cool sea breezes, and some welcoming warm weather and sunshine._ Besides, Taylor would be out of school for spring break and she didn't really have anything planned. This would be a pleasant surprise for him and a much needed getaway for her. They hadn't visited her father's family down south in a few years. She smiled to herself as she put in a request to take two weeks off and turned it in for approval. Satisfied with that she tried to put a better effort in her work.

"Carter! I need you to go out to a scene on 54th and Lexington. We've got three fresh bodies," said the captain.

She inwardly sighed. _Three homicides in one night?_ These three would bring the homicide total to eight in two weeks. Fusco was already uptown working on a case- a love triangle gone badly, so she would be without her partner on this one. She put her gun in her holster, shrugged on her black overcoat and headed to the crime scene.

_**54**__**th**__** & Lexington**_

Joss got out of her cruiser and walked over to the crime scene where she saw Detective Terney.

"You finally ditch your partner?" he asked.

She sighed. She was not in the mood for their usual banter. "Fusco's uptown working a case- love triangle gone bad," she replied.

"Any of those ever go good?" Terney joked.

"Can't imagine they do." She got back to the topic on hand, "What happened here?"

"Two of the bodies belong to Elias, the other is an innocent."

_Elias? Something about this stinks,_ she thought. "Think it's the Russians?"

"It's possible, but Elias has pissed off so many people." Terney turned to face her and said, "Listen, Carter I've hearing from people that you've been looking into Beecher's murder?"

She felt uneasy about him questioning her about Beecher. She didn't know who to trust anymore and promptly brushed him off. "What I do in my off time isn't your concern, Terney."

"No, no, no. I'm not looking to bust your balls. I just want you to know, if you need help I'm more than happy to give you a hand."

"Thanks." She felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up and felt like she was being watched. She looked up to see John watching them in the shadows before turning to enter an alleyway. "You know, I'm gonna uh… canvas up the block. See if I can get anybody to talk."

Many different emotions ran through her as she made her way to the alley. The last time she saw John in person was after she and Beecher saved Finch on Owen Island from the serial killer. They didn't even speak. It was a brief nod of thanks from afar as he and Finch got in the car to leave. The last conversation they had was last week over the phone and that left her with a sour taste in her mouth. She didn't really want to call him, but needed his support or at least his assurance about what she decided to do for Fusco. She used to be able to get feedback from him before, but ever since she tried to get him out of that bomb vest he'd avoided her. What could he possibly want from her now? She felt tense, agitated, angry, frustrated, but mostly she felt hurt. And hurt won out over all the other emotions. She walked up to him and paused as he turned his body halfway to her.

"You okay Carter?"

_Am I okay? Where have you been? What's going on? Why am I getting the silent treatment? I thought we were friends, but you don't seem to trust me enough to let me know what's going on. Why? What changed? _She thought of all those things but didn't want to put forth so much energy. She barely had any as it was, so she simply replied "How do I look, John?"

John briefly closed his eyes and pressed his lips into a grim line. "You get anything new on Beecher's killer?"

Joss shook her head. "Nothing, but I know HR had their hands in it. And I'm going to do whatever I can to bring them down."

"I'm sorry, Carter. Beecher was a good man."

She nodded and looked down and feelings of guilt and regret for what could have been washed over her. "Yes he was." She gave a tight smile that didn't meet her eyes. "_But_ I've got a job to do. Three fresh bodies- my eighth homicide in two weeks."

"Just tell me what I can do to help." He knew that things were bad since they hadn't gotten a new number in the past ten days. He wanted to help, needed to find a way to help. Waiting around for days with no new numbers left him idle and without much of a purpose. He never did well with idle time.

"You can start by telling me what has changed. Most of these homicides were premeditated. The types of situations you guys usually warned us about."

He turned his body to face her completely; hoping that she trusted him and understood that he wasn't maliciously leaving her in the dark. "There's a situation. We're working on it."

She figured he wouldn't tell her anything and wondered if he and Finch would ever trust her enough to tell her anything. "Well hurry." She fought to keep her tears and feelings of hopelessness at bay. "I never thought I'd say this but the Russians are worse than Elias. More manpower…. fewer rules."

* * *

_(3 days ago)_

Ethan pulled the SUV in the driveway and cut the engine. He turned to Joss and held her hand. She'd been noticeably quiet on the drive back from the lake house and the change in her mood did not go unnoticed.

"Is something wrong? Did I say or do something to upset you?" He thought the morning went well. After their shower they shared a hearty breakfast of blueberry pancakes and the conversation and banter was just as great as it had been for the past couple of days. However, when they packed their bags and loaded them in the car so that he could take her back to her cousin's house, she got really quiet and withdrawn.

"No, I'm fine. Just a little tired. I've got a long trip back up the road." She gave a tight smile quickly squeezed his hand and turned to open the passenger side door. He let go of her hand to get out of the car and opened the door to the backseat to grab her overnight bag. He walked around the car and put his free arm around her waist to walk her to the front door of the house.

As they reached the steps of the front porch, he stopped and turned her body to face him still holding his arm around her waist. "You know, Joss my offer still stands for you and your family to take the jet to get home. I know you can take care of yourself. You're obviously a very independent woman, but let me take care of you and make sure you get back to the city safely. There's no reason for you to have to drive back when you can fly back in style." He gave her the smile he knew to work on many other women and hoped she would capitulate.

Joss sighed. She wasn't sure how to tell him that she didn't want to take his offer because he was only supposed to be a one-night stand and she had no intentions of seeing him after today. She looked at him and started to argue, but he cut her off and continued.

"Here, take this." He pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and fished out a business card. "Call the number on this card and let them know who you are. I will make sure everything is set up so that the jet can fly you from here to Charleston where you can pick up Taylor and your mother and you can all fly back to New York together."

"What am I supposed to do about the car?" she weakly argued, knowing he was going to come up with an answer for everything.

"The car can be shipped back to the city. I'll make sure that's taken care of as well."

Joss looked at the Camry and then looked at the ground to avoid making eye contact. She knew she really needed to end this. She took a deep breath and met his eyes as she finally mustered up the courage to break things off. This didn't need to be more than what it was and she wasn't the type to string a man along. As if he knew she was going to brush him off, he continued on.

"Just think about it okay. Call the number on this card." He took her hand and placed the card in her palm, closing her fingers around it. "I wish I could spend another day with you, but I've got to head back to New York. I have your number and you have mine. I'd like for us to see each other again." He cupped her face in his hands and stared longingly into her eyes. "I really do want to see you again. Use the jet. Call me when you get back safely and we'll talk then." He leaned down to give her a gentle kiss on the lips. He put her overnight bag down on the porch and made his way back to the car, started the engine, and backed out of the driveway.

She didn't move an inch until his car made its way down the street and out of her line of sight. Joss heard the front door open and turned to see her younger cousin leaning on the door frame with her arms crossed smirking.

"Have fun, Joss?" she asked. Her smirk turned into a full-fledged grin.

Joss gave her one of her patented glares and said, "Shut up, Janice." She climbed the stairs to the porch, picked up her overnight bag and made her way into the house.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_(3 days ago)_

While Joss crossed over the threshold and made her way into the foyer, she heard snickers from Janice as she closed the front door and locked it. She dropped her bag at the bottom of the stairway and turned around to frown at her cousin, who still had that stupid grin on her face.

"Care to let me in on the joke?" Joss asked.

"Oh, there's no joke really. I'm just amused that you actually decided to take a walk on the wild side," Janice replied with what appeared to be a mix amusement and genuine disbelief written all over her face.

Joss turned back to face the stairs. "You'd be surprised at all the lines I've crossed lately," she mumbled softly and cleared her throat. "I'm just gonna head upstairs to gather the rest of my things. I need to get on the road to pick up mom and Taylor and start the even longer drive home," she said as she picked up her bag, and started to make her way up the stairs.

"Wait a minute, Joss. Don't be like that. I'm sorry. Really I am. I was only teasing," Janice said as she watched Joss continue to climb the stairs. Seeing that her apology wasn't going to stop her favorite older cousin from leaving, she decided to go for broke and pushed one of Joss' well-known buttons.

"I don't understand the rush home. Ethan said you could use his jet, so you may as well come back downstairs, have a cup of coffee with me, and tell me what happened last night." She saw her cousin stop almost mid-step and knew she'd hit the bulls eye. Eavesdropping or spying on Joss was a big pet peeve and Janice knew that. Back when they were kids she would snoop around on her older sister and cousins all the time wishing to be a part of their crew, but was too young to hang around them. Joss hated her snooping back then, and Janice knew she still hated it now.

Joss stopped halfway up the stairs, took a deep breath and released it as she rolled her eyes to look up at the ceiling. _Stay calm, Joss. She's pushing your buttons on purpose. Just like she's always done and will always do. It's not like you haven't had a shortage of snoops meddling in your life anyway. You have two of the biggest busy bodies tracking your every move in New York. _Joss smiled at that thought and turned around to look at her cousin who obviously wasn't prepared to see that smile and suddenly looked almost nervous.

"If you were listening in on our conversation, why didn't you just come outside to say hello?" Joss asked with a smirk.

Janice shrugged her shoulders. "Nah….I thought about it, but he was clinging to you like sticky rice at a Japanese steak house. I figured you two needed your privacy," she replied with an answering grin, fully aware of the irony in her comment.

Joss tried to hold in the laughter that threatened to bubble from her belly, but couldn't and burst into a fit of giggles. Janice also couldn't hold in her giggles either as it was suddenly contagious. Those giggles soon turned into hearty laughs. If a stranger caught them in this moment they would think that these two women had lost their minds. After the laughter died down Joss wiped a tear from her eye, caught her breath, looked down at her cousin and said, "I really can't _stand_ you sometimes."

To which Janice simply replied, "I love you too Jossy-bear. Now go ahead and pack your things but come right back down here as soon as you're finished. I wanna know all the juicy details from yesterday and last night. Besides, I have a new espresso machine in the kitchen that I just learned how to use and we're gonna have cappuccinos and scones."

"I'm not really all that hungry. I had a really big breakfast so I'll just have some coffee." Joss said as she continued her trek up the stairs to the guest room. "I'll be down in a few."

* * *

_(14 days ago)_

_It's five in the morning. I should really try to get some sleep_, Joss thought to herself as she stood in front of her closet wide awake going through her wardrobe. She was still having nightmares, but this time it wasn't the year old corpse of Detective Stills that haunted her dreams. This time Cal Beecher played the lead role in her nightmares. She woke up in a cold sweat and had trouble going back to sleep after that.

During that bout of insomnia, Joss decided to go ahead and begin packing clothes for her trip. She went to the back of her closet and pulled out the trunk where her spring and summer clothes were packed away. She wasn't really satisfied with her choices. Sundresses, shorts, skirts, capris, tunics, and tanks- while cute and comfortable, seemed timeworn and passé. _I really need to do some shopping. Maybe I'll find some cute stuff at the outlet stores when we get down there _she thought. She smiled as she continued to fill her suitcase with the better looking pieces.

After Joss closed and zipped the top of her suitcase she thought back on last night's conversation with John. She wondered exactly what the _issue_ was that he and Finch were dealing with. It must be pretty bad if he couldn't even keep eye contact with her when they spoke. John had broken this estrangement between them and even apologized. While she was still peeved that he didn't trust her enough to let her know what was going on, she also hoped that things were going back to normal or… at least their version of normal, whatever _that_ was.

The digital alarm clock on her night stand rang loudly pulling her from her thoughts and served as a glaring reminder that she never went back to sleep and wouldn't go back to sleep for the next 14 or more hours. She sighed as she turned off the alarm and slipped on her robe. She went to wake Taylor and started a big pot of coffee. This was going to be a long day.

It was pretty late when she made it home last night so she told Taylor about the trip over breakfast. He seemed pretty excited about seeing his family and was looking forward to the trip. As she cleared the table with their dishes she asked him to see if he could find any decently priced tickets for last-minute flights online. He didn't have any luck so she thought that maybe a road trip would be the way to go. After she dropped Taylor off at his school, she made a mental note to call her mom to see if she wanted to join them on the trip.

As the day wore on into the late evening, Joss found herself in a foul mood. She was upset because she didn't have the evidence she needed yet to solve Beecher's murder, but she was also upset at John's brush off hours ago. He and Finch called her earlier that morning to get information on an "Ernest Thornhill" and she thought that things were getting back to some semblance of normal.

They would call, she and Fusco would get information, John would get in some sort of trouble, and they would go to bail him out saving the day for him and the number. She could do this. She was used to this. She naively got her hopes up that maybe they could save this guy before it all went to hell. Well, it looked to be too late for that.

There was an explosion from a drone that flew into the back of the town car and the driver was critically injured, but stable. However, there was no sign of Mr. Thornhill in the vehicle. No one had ever met Mr. Thornhill in person and everyone at his company was hired online. As usual with the numbers Finch and John worked to save, this was a strange case where there was more than meets the eye.

After speaking with Thornhill's secretary, she called John back to get a better idea of what they were dealing with. Something just wasn't right with this Thornhill guy. He had made a reservation online with the car service with instructions to drive from JFK to his office without a passenger. The conversation replayed in her head.

"We've got this one under control. Thanks-"

"John." She spoke out before he could end the call. _What the hell was this?_ She was tired of being dismissed and felt like she had shown in more ways than one that she was a team player. _Why are they leaving me out of this? What's going on?_ She was having none of it. "If you could just _trust_ me a little bit more, maybe I could help."

"I know you could, Joss. But right now maybe… Beecher needs your help more than we do. Good luck." She was met with a dial tone as he disconnected the call. She resisted the urge to slam the phone down on her desk.

So here she was, going over Beecher's file for what seemed like the millionth time. Joss sighed as she re-read statements and looked over the pictures of the crime scene in the file for Beecher's murder. The evidence pointed at him being killed in the line of duty, but it just didn't feel right. Everything was swept too cleanly under the rug. She knew that Cal wasn't HR and had found himself in their crosshairs, but she couldn't find anything to prove it. She felt her stress level rise and her frustration threatened to lash out on the next person she came across if she didn't calm down. She could deal with the stress. She dealt with stress on a daily basis. She'd rather deal with that other than the guilt she was carrying around for not trusting Beecher or believing that he was a dirty cop up until it was too late.

Guilt. It was a funny thing. She was carrying guilt from Donnelly's, Szymanski's, and Beecher's deaths and it was steadily wearing her down. Logically, she knew that there was no way that she could have prevented their deaths. That while she may have been directly or indirectly involved in the events leading up to their demise, it wasn't her fault. She didn't pull the trigger. She wasn't the one that gunned these men down. But the guilt ate away at her nonetheless.

She told herself that she was justified in her lack of trust and her apprehensive feelings about Cal. Despite the fact she had been holding back in their relationship, he never really gave her a reason to trust him. The first red flag was raised after she'd lost the opportunity to work for the FBI because of her association with him. That was actually ironic. She was scared about failing the lie detector test and being found out as working with "The Man in the Suit." It wasn't working with Finch and John that hindered a career move. It was Beecher. She'd tried to avoid him to cool down and keep the peace, but he was persistent.

When she finally asked him about the IAB investigations he simply dismissed her and her concerns as if being investigated by internal affairs was a common thing for a vice cop working undercover. Except, she didn't buy his excuses and he reacted in anger by increasing the speed of the car to dangerous levels on the slick roads in the middle of a storm on the way to Owen Island. It got so bad that she felt the need to reach for her service weapon. They were never able to get on better footing after that.

Shortly after that incident, everything happened with Szymanski and she just could not trust him any longer. He wouldn't give her the name of his C.I. so, she had to go around him to clear Szymanski's name. Szymanski was shot down hours later. After Fusco bugged Beecher's phone, they later found out that he wasn't dirty and was being used as a pawn in a larger scheme with HR. She thought about the last time she spoke with him. How she was going to meet up with him for drinks, clear the air, and end things as friends. Maybe even find a way to partner up with him and bring HR down for good. But she never got that chance. If anything, that was probably what ate at her. The chance for closure was stripped from her so she carried around this guilt.

Joss sighed as she closed the file and locked it away in her drawer. She decided to stop ruminating over her current state of affairs and went to get a cup of coffee. When she returned to her desk she saw Fusco at his desk across from her wearing his reading glasses and shuffling papers around. He looked to be about as stressed as she was feeling, but she understood that he was going through the motions also. Things had for lack of a better word, _died down_, at the precinct since they were not able to find Stills' body and IAB dropped their investigation on Fusco. But it still seemed like the powers that be were giving him shit for not being able to pin Stills' disappearance on him and lock him away. After Fusco got his badge and service gun back, he'd been put on assignments that had him out on the field for the past few days.

"Hey Fusco, long time no see. How are things looking on the double homicide on 123rd from earlier this week?" she asked of the most recent murder case he'd been working.

Not looking at her, he absently replied, "About as well as it can be. I've got some more leads to follow up on, but I'm about to call it a night. It's been a long day and I just needed to get some things together to look over later." He took off his glasses, tossed them on his desk and finally looked up at his partner.

"Geez, Carter you look like shit."

"Thanks for the compliment, Fusco. You always know how to flatter a girl." She replied as she rolled her eyes.

"It's quittin' time, Carter and you look like crap. Why don't you go home, ya know, get some rest?"

She absently stared at her computer screen trying to decide if she wanted to work on another case or look further into Beecher's file. She clicked on the new mail icon on the screen indicating she had a new message. It was an automated response alerting her that her time-off request had been approved. "I'll rest when I go on vacation. I've got the weekend off and I just got approved for time off the next couple weeks. You say I need rest? Well don't worry. I should get plenty of R&R while I'm out."

"Oh, yeah? Where ya goin'?"

"Taylor and I are taking a road trip down south. Gonna visit my father's family. It's been years since our last visit. And frankly I could use the sunshine and warm weather. It's been so cold and gray lately. I mean, it's _April_ for crying out loud."

Fusco got up from his desk and neatly piled the paperwork together on his desk. He gathered his things and walked over to Carter's desk. "Well, don't stay here too long. That paperwork will be here for the both of us tomorrow. I'm outta here."

"Hey, Fusco, before you leave," she said as she stood up and walked closer to him. She lowered her voice, "Did you ever find out anything on Beecher?"

"Not yet, but I workin' on it. Among other things. Don't worry Carter, we'll get 'em. Maybe Mr. Glasses or Wonderboy can give us a hand. See what they can find out."

"They've been pretty busy doing their own thing lately."

"Yeah, but Mr. Vocabulary can look up all kinds of stuff on his computer and hack into anything. And BOME can hang someone over the side of a building to get them to talk. Besides, as much as we cover their asses, it's about time they return the favor, busy or not. You think the fact that we're busy with actual jobs doing real detective work stops them from asking us to do stuff? No."

"I guess you're right. But we get them involved, _only_ if we run out of options."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen, I'll talk to you tomorrow. I'm beat and I'm ready to grab a pizza and fall asleep watching 'Two and a Half Men'."

Joss shook her head and smiled. "Good night, Fusco."

"Good night," he said over his shoulder as he made his way out of the precinct. Joss went back to her desk, sat down, and settled in to take another look at Beecher's case file.

"Hey Carter." She looked up and saw Terney walking over to her desk. Before Terney approached her desk, she immediately closed the file and covered it with other papers on her desk.

"I got a lead on the guy that shot Beecher. Thought you might want in?"

"Yeah," she replied, unknowingly walking into HR's trap. She opened the side drawer of her desk, retrieved her gun, attached it to her holster, and followed Terney out of the precinct to check out the lead.

* * *

_(3 days ago)_

Joss brought all of her bags downstairs and placed them by the front door. She made her way to the kitchen where Janice already had a cup of cappuccino ready for her on the table in the breakfast nook. She took a seat across from her cousin and picked up the dainty porcelain mug and took a slow sip.

"So how was it?"

Joss decided to stall, not really wanting to discuss her sex life with her baby cousin. "It's good. How long have you been making these? They're just as good as or maybe even better than the coffee shop by my precinct." She took another sip of the coffee.

Janice looked at her as if she'd grown two heads. "Huh? No, Joss! Not the coffee! I _know_ that's good. I was a barista in my former life. We're cool on the coffee. I'm talking about being with Ethan. Was it good?"

Joss sighed and shrugged her shoulders. "Yeah, it was good, but it was just sex. I got a release and so did he," she promptly changed the subject. "Can you make one of these for me to go? This is really good and I could use a pick me up to take with me on the way back."

"You're seriously going to drive back to Charleston and then turn around and drive back to New York? Are you crazy? You know what- don't answer that."

"I'm not crazy, Janice. I just need to end things with him. Cut things off cleanly."

"What exactly is the problem, Joss? The man is obviously smitten with you. I could see that looking out the window through the sheer curtains. That man's nose is _wide open!_ He's nice, fine as hell, _and_ he's wealthy. Besides, I don't think you, Aunt Vicky, and Taylor should have to go home by taking some long ass road trip all because you want to be stubborn." Janice finished, thoroughly exhausted with her cousin's behavior.

"First of all, I don't care about his money. Secondly, I'm not making what happened between Ethan and I more than what it really is- a fling. Lastly, I'm done discussing this with you." Joss crossed her arms, sat back in her chair, and looked at her cousin. Her eyes dared Janice to say anything else about it.

Janice must have taken on the dare because she continued with a knowing smile. "Oh, I think I know what this is about."

"Oh?" Joss asked as raised an eyebrow and leaned forward to rest her arms on the table.

"Where's your list?"

Joss froze. "My what?"

"Your. List. Where is it? What? Did you think I forgot about that? I know we were drinking when we typed it out that night, but I remember what you put on that list and I just wonder if that's why you are so quick to end things. You were with him all day yesterday. _Allll_ day and _allllll_ night long. I just want to know how many things we can check off," she said with a chuckle as Joss suddenly found the magnets on the fridge to be very interesting.

"The list is in my bag," Joss answered quietly looking down into the cup of cooling coffee.

"Well go get it, Jossy-bear. And I'll get you a fresh cup of joe."

Joss walked to the front door and searched the front pocket of her overnight bag. _Hmm. I thought I put it in here. Maybe it's in my purse._ She checked her purse and didn't find it there either. _That's weird. I guess I didn't take it with me after all. Oh, well. At least I don't have to go over this list with her anymore._ "Hey Janice!" she yelled from the foyer. "I don't think I ever took it with me. I probably threw it away. So let's just drop this."

Janice walked into the foyer. "No worries. I saved it on my laptop, so I can print out another copy for you. Go grab your coffee and meet me in the office. Oh, and another thing. Don't forget to bring that card that Ethan gave you. Since you won't make the arrangements, I will. You, Taylor and Aunt Vicky _will_ be flying back home and that's that. You're not gonna have my favorite aunt and my sweet little cousin on that highway all day and night. End of discussion." She walked towards her home office leaving a dumbfounded Joss standing in the foyer wondering why she always lets Janice have her way.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

_(13 days ago)_

It was just after 9am and Joss hadn't slept since before 5am the previous morning. She'd been sitting in the interrogation room for hours after the shooting for questioning with the IAB. They asked her again to tell them what led to the shooting that night. She knew that her version of events was the truth. She repeated her statement for the tenth time, telling them that the suspect emerged, running out of the back door, pointed a weapon at her, and she shot him using lethal force. She didn't know what happened to the suspect's weapon.

They'd left her in the room after that telling her that she was making it harder than it needed to be and that they would resume questioning in twenty minutes. Being on the other side of an interrogation, she knew what they were trying to do, but she wouldn't budge. She was exasperated at this point. She had been up for over 24 hours and was running on fumes. She racked her brain trying to figure out what happened. She had been admittedly tired last night, but not too tired to stay on top of her game while in the middle of a bust. She always kept her wits about her while out on the field, given how dangerous things could be on the streets of New York.

She clearly remembered that the guy had a gun and instinctively she took the shot. Terney said he believed her, but he didn't see a gun. Someone had to have moved it and she came to the conclusion that this was how HR was going to get her out of their way. An IAB investigation would keep her out of the field and depending on the severity of the offense; she could be suspended or worse fired. She couldn't let that happen. She wouldn't let that happen.

Joss replayed the events of last night in her head once more and a light bulb lit up in her head. The uniformed officer on the scene near the criminal's body was dirty, she was sure of it now. He was taken in for questioning last year during the big HR sting, but he was never implicated in any wrongdoing.

She knew that once she was out of this room, the first thing she needed to do was contact Fusco. See if he could have a talk with the guy. She trusted her partner and they had each other's backs. Fusco was as loyal as they came and she was confident that if they put their heads together, they would find a way out of this. She was now determined more than ever to dig in her heels, solve Beecher and Szymanski's murders and bring HR down for good this time. No more loose ends.

Just as she gained a newfound resolve, she heard the door open to see Detective Terney walk through the door with two cups of coffee. She was thankful for the much needed caffeine, but what she really needed was a long hot shower and some rest.

"Hi," he said as he came through the door.

"Hey," she replied.

"You holdin' up okay, Carter?" Terney asked as he closed the door to the interrogation room behind him.

"Ehhh.." was her only response, shrugging her shoulders, too tired to answer much more than that.

"Here," he placed a cup of coffee on the table next to her.

"Thanks" She appreciatively accepted the coffee and looked up at him with a tired smile. He gave her a reassuring rub on the shoulder and made his way to the opposite side of the room facing her at the end of the table.

"So… I made my statement. I.. I don't know what else to do," he shrugged. "Still no sign of the weapon. You really ought to contact your union rep," he finished as he took a sip of coffee.

"No," she shook her head. "I'll be fine. I know who took the weapon." She looked up at him and continued, "I recognized one of the unis at the crime scene. He was questioned on the HR sting, but they let him go. Gonna have Fusco have a little talk with him." She took a sip of her coffee as she looked away, not knowing if she could trust him. She had always thought Terney was a good guy, but she couldn't figure out why he lied and said he didn't see a weapon. He was right there with her as it happened. She feared that he may be dirty, but couldn't be sure since he had been so willing to help her with Beecher's case.

He sighed and shook his head. Carter was so stubborn. She really didn't know when to quit. He realized that he wasn't going to be able to slow her down or stop her meddling so he went for the jugular. "That's always been the problem with you Carter. You, you just never figured out when to keep your big mouth shut."

Joss sat back in surprise. Feelings of dread crept up her spine as the realization of her worst fears about Terney had materialized. He was dirty, this whole incident was a set up, and Terney had been the one chosen to take her down. She looked over to the two way mirror, wondering if anyone was behind it watching them, as he walked around the table and leaned forward against the table to get in her face. She quickly decided it was best to stay quiet as he continued his diatribe.

"Listen, you've always been okay to me Carter. And frankly, I don't like killing women." It took an enormous amount of self-control for Joss to keep a neutral face and stay in her seat. She braced herself for the rest of Terney's words. "You keep digging, I'm gonna put you in the ground. Just like we did to your boyfriend. You drag your recovering dirt bag partner into this, we will pull the ripcord on him too. And maybe.. your kid." She couldn't hold back the look of surprise as she realized the type of monster he was. She didn't recognize the man standing before her. He'd threatened Taylor and didn't even blink. The mother bear in her roared as she felt her anger rise to unhealthy levels.

"Now you're gonna do yourself a favor and sit here and take it." Joss clenched her jaw and gave a barely perceptible nod to let Terney know that she got his _message_. She now understood how a person could kill another in cold blood because she wanted to shoot Terney with his own gun.

"That's a good girl," he sneered as his cell phone rang. He turned his back on her to answer it and walked out of the room. Joss immediately cloned his phone with hers to listen to his call.

"_Hey boss, no, she's not gonna give us a problem. Next up we kill Elias' right hand man. Then we get the man himself. I called in a couple favors. Prison transfer. Tonight."_

Joss hung up her phone after the call ended and was in a daze. _That's what this has been about all along _she thought as the pieces of the puzzle started coming together. _HR must have some sort of alliance with the Russians. That would explain Szymanski's death and Beecher was used as a patsy to set him up, so they had to kill him, too._ Getting rid of her was a way to cut any loose ends that could connect HR to Beecher and Szymanski's murders so they could move on with their plans to take out Elias and rise back into power in the city.

About an hour later, IAB dismissed her and told her she was off duty for the rest of the day. They kept her gun and badge and explained to her that since she was scheduled to be out for the next couple of weeks, she would be on desk duty upon her return until the investigation was complete. She had a funny feeling that the IAB was in on this as well, but it was only a gut feeling. She couldn't trust anyone anymore. If she hadn't already requested time off, she would have been forced to take time off under an unpaid suspension. As she made her way to the desk her phone rang.

"Carter I've been worried, are you okay?" John asked. He didn't really have a reason to call her, but he had a feeling that he needed to check on her. He couldn't help but remember the last time he saw her; how tired and worn down she looked. She looked almost…defeated. He'd never seen her that way before. He remembered the tears in her eyes that she held back, refusing to let them fall. He couldn't even look at her anymore after that. The recent events were definitely taking a toll on her as they were on him.

When he and Shaw were in the library earlier searching for clues on where the machine could be, they came across some pictures of the numbers that Nathan and Harold had tried to help in the early days of their mission to save the irrelevants. As he came across a picture of Jessica, he stopped and he stared at her. She was just as beautiful as he remembered. The feelings of guilt and regret that he couldn't get to her in time to save her was there, but surprisingly it wasn't as prevalent as it once was. He wasn't all the way there yet, but he knew he had started to move on. He didn't think he would ever get to this point; where he could look at a picture of Jess or even talk about her without being overwhelmed by despair, but he was here. Working the numbers with Finch gave him purpose, but building a friendship with Carter- no building a friendship with _Joss_ also had a lot to do with his progress. Their relationship had come a long way.

Now, he was in the middle of a police chase with Shaw and trying desperately to track down Finch and Root. He wanted Joss there with him like she was before when Root took Harold, but he knew she couldn't be with him this time. The circumstances were different, and he didn't want to put her in any danger. Yet, he felt the need to hear her voice. He knew what that meant, but didn't want to acknowledge it. He'd toyed around with the idea of getting involved with her before, but promptly buried those feelings. That was around the time she started seeing Beecher, and soon after that he got arrested and that was when everything went to hell. They were just starting to get their footing back after his self-imposed hiatus, so he would try to be the friend she said he was the night Donnelly caught them.

"I've been better," Joss replied tiredly. She wondered if she should let him know what happened with her and Terney and swiftly decided against it. She would tell him later when she had more time to talk with fewer eyes and ears around. "But look, that can wait. I think HR and Yogorov's crew are gonna take out Elias tonight."

"Elias tried to kill you, Joss. He kidnapped your son. His well-being isn't exactly a priority for me." He quickly pushed away those memories as he felt himself getting tense. He hoped she wasn't going to try to do anything to save Elias, but he had a funny feeling that she would.

Joss knew he would bring up what Elias' past actions, but she pushed forward with the information she found out from cloning Terney's cell phone. "His lieutenant was gunned down this morning. The first thing Elias did was get his bodyguards paroled to watch his man in the hospital. At least he's loyal," she said bitterly thinking about how Terney turned on her. She heard sirens coming from John's end of the line and was automatically concerned. At this point there was nothing she was able to do to help him, even if he were to accept it or ask for it. She had no badge, no gun, and was closely being watched while under investigation. "Are you okay?"

"Sorry Joss, gotta go. Please just keep your head down." Now was not the time to lose focus; there was no need for her to get involved, so he had to end this call. He needed to find Harold and the Machine so that things could go back to normal. Once everything was settled and he knew Harold and the Machine were safe, he would meet with her to talk and find out what else is going on. He knew she was keeping something from him, that there something else was going on with her. He could hear it in her voice how tired she sounded. He just didn't have the time ask her more about it, much less try to figure out what it was. He had a feeling that she was already working on a plan to save Elias. He hoped he would be wrong.

"You too. Though I know you won't," she said with a smile in her voice as she disconnected the call. It was the first time she had a reason to smile all week.

She hung up the phone with him and felt her determination waning. She knew what she had to do. She knew she had to stop tonight's transfer for Elias. They'd already tried to kill Elias' lieutenant and she was sure they were going to make the drop on him tonight during the transfer. But John's words gave her pause, forced her to reevaluate her pending course of action, and left her in doubt on what to do next.

John was right about Elias. He was nothing but trouble. She thought of all the hell he brought into her life; how he tried to have her killed; how he took her son and tried to use him as leverage for the mafia dons. But now the tables had turned. It was HR that tried to get rid of her. It was HR that threatened her son and her partner. It was HR that had to go down.

If she wasn't so tired she'd say the phone call from John was a bit odd. After such a long period of silence and separation, the road back to their...whatever it was had been rocky to say the least. And he called her Joss, which he never used to do. He called her out of the blue asking about her in the middle of what sounded like a police chase. He seemed genuinely concerned about her well-being. She couldn't quite wrap her head around it. Maybe this was their new normal. She inwardly chuckled at the thought.

If she had to be honest with herself she'd admit that although the call was odd and seemed out of character for him, she really did need to hear his voice at that time. She couldn't help but smile as she remembered how she felt to hear the sound of her name spoken in his voice. Once things died down she hoped they would be able to meet up and simply talk to each other like they used to. She missed him. She missed their banter, the flirting, but mostly the friendship. She dallied with the idea of things moving beyond friendship between the two of them but quickly brushed those thoughts away.

_Get it together, girl. Just because you're truly on first name basis with him doesn't make it more than what it is. Stop mooning over a simple phone call, go home, and get some sleep. You need to figure out what you're going to do about HR and Elias!_

She collected her coat, purse, and Beecher and Szymanski's files. She walked towards the doors of the precinct and ran through a mental checklist of things she had to do today. She knew she had to call Fusco as soon as she left the precinct. She needed to go home, shower, sleep, eat and make sure Taylor was fully packed for their trip. And somewhere in between all of that she also had to come up with a feasible plan to stop HR and the Russians from killing Elias.

The pragmatic side of her said that she needed to stay out of this. She'd been essentially "suspended" from her job, had a target on her back with HR, had threats made against her child, and knew her actions were being watched closely just after getting the FBI and CIA off her back. But the fearless side of her refused to back down. Whatever she decided to do tonight needed to be covert and from how things sounded over the phone with John, he was busy dealing with whatever was going on with their source. It was highly likely that she would be working alone. She had no idea how things were going to turn out tonight and wasn't sure what would happen upon her return to work in two weeks, but she knew she needed to do this. The Russians were worse than Elias, and with HR behind them the murders that have been on the rise in the past two weeks would be child's play.

As she walked down the steps outside of the precinct, she called Fusco to see if he could meet her at the diner for a late lunch a few blocks away to talk. What they needed to discuss couldn't be done over the phone. She hailed a cab, opened the door, slid into the seat and closed the door behind her. She rode home in the silence of the cab, lost in her thoughts.

* * *

_(3 days ago)_

Joss sat on the small sofa in Janice's home office as she watched her cousin print out another copy of her bucket list. Janice pulled the paper off the top of the printer, grabbed a pen and a book from her desk, and took a seat next to Joss on the couch. She sat the book in her lap and, placed the print out on top of it, and clicked her pen ready to scratch off the items on the list.

"So which ones have you done so far?" she asked with faux seriousness.

Joss sighed and rolled her eyes. "I am _not_ doing this with you. Will you please just let it go."

"Oh, come on! You don't even have to tell me all the details. Here," she held the paper out to Joss to take. "Just take a look at the list and tell me which ones to cross off."

Joss didn't make an effort to take the paper from Janice. In fact, she didn't move an inch. Janice annoyingly waved the paper in her face urging her to take it. Joss sucked her teeth, snatched the list from Janice, and skimmed through the items on her list. She couldn't believe she typed half the things on here. When would she ever have time to do any of this stuff? Hell, _why_ would she even want to do any of this stuff? As she got towards the bottom of the list she took note of which ones she'd done and gave the list back to Janice.

_Too late to turn back now, _she thought to herself_. I did it, and my only regret is that I didn't break things off with Ethan while we were here. This is just one more thing to deal with when I get back home. I might as well go for some of the rest of these items and see where that takes me. It might even be fun. Besides, what else am I gonna do when I get back home?_

"Scratch off 17, 18, and 19," Joss said as she picked up the mug of coffee from the end table next to the sofa, and took a long sip. She looked at her cousin and almost choked on her coffee as she laughed at the expression on her face. "Next time, be careful what you ask for Jan."

Janice was momentarily speechless. She looked down at the list and looked back at Joss in disbelief. "No…. I don't believe you. I think you're pulling my leg, Joss. I didn't fall off the turnip truck, okay? I was _pushed_."

Joss chuckled at her cousin's colorful version of the old colloquialism. "I'm being serious. Scratch those off the list. And while you're at it, scratch off number one as well." Joss said feeling bold now. _Why the hell not?_

"Cut your hair? Joss I can't even remember the last time you wore your hair above your shoulders. The last time your hair was short was before you went off to college and met Michael. Then you let it grow out and stay long because that's how he liked it." Janice looked at Joss waiting for her to say that she was joking, but it looked like she was ready to go through with it.

"I tried to talk you into cutting it almost two years ago, but the only thing you would let me do is give you the feathery layers." Joss sighed as she listened to her cousin go on a tangent about her hair. Who knew it was this damn serious? She wasn't going to pick anything too short or crazy. Geez….

Janice continued not noticing that her words were starting to go in one ear and out of the other for Joss. "_Then_ you went and got those DREADFUL bangs. You shoulda shot your hairstylist in her pinky toe for that shit. You have a cute heart shaped face and don't need bangs to cover it up. Thank goodness you grew them out. Ugh!"

Joss smirked as she watched her cousin taking deep breaths after getting herself all worked up about hair that wasn't even on _her_ head. "Are you done now?"

"Yes," Janice replied crossly as she glared at her.

"Well, that's why I'm asking you to do it. You're the hair stylist with the successful beauty salon in Buckhead. I'm sure you can come up with something," Joss replied as Janice rolled her eyes and let out a dramatic sigh. "What's wrong? You kept poking the _Jossy-bear_, and now you act like you don't know what to do."

Janice pursed her lips and looked at Joss with amusement in her eyes. "Okay." Janice nodded her head as she spoke. "You wanna be all Billy Badass? Fine!" She stood up from the couch and went to the small bookshelf behind the desk. "Let me get a few hair books and you can pick out whatever short style you like. While you're doing that, I'm going to call the number on that card Ethan gave you and set up the arrangements to get you on that plane and get Aunt Vicky's Camry shipped back to New York."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

_(3 days ago)_

Ethan pulled into Brown Field about 40 minutes after dropping Joss off at Janice's house. He was on cloud nine and was all smiles as he parked his car in a space close to the hangar. He was greeted by an attendant as he exited the vehicle.

"Good morning, Mr. Bradley. The jet has been fueled and is ready to go. We also have directions to route the plane back here to pick up Ms. Carter to return to New York with a stop in Charleston to pick up two additional passengers. We've also arranged to have her vehicle shipped back to New York. Are there any additional arrangements that need to be made?" asked the attendant.

Ethan's smile got wider. He was elated that Joss decided to take him up on his offer. He couldn't wait to see her again. "No, that will be all. I'll just grab my things and board the plane."

"Not a problem, sir. Allow me to help you with your bags," he responded as he walked around to the backseat of the car to help with Ethan's luggage. Ethan opened the door and grabbed his overnight bag while the attendant reached for the suitcase on the other side. As he was walking toward the plane, the attendant called out for him to get his attention.

"Mr. Bradley!" Ethan turned to face him and saw that he held a folded sheet of paper. "It looks like this may have fallen out of your bag."

Ethan didn't recognize the paper, but took it from the attendant anyway. He put the paper in his pocket, thanked the attendant with a generous tip, and made his way to the plane. He walked up the stairs of the Gulfstream and was greeted by a smiling flight attendant at the door. "Good morning, Mr. Bradley."

The pilot appeared soon after to join the flight attendant in the doorway and spoke to Ethan. "Good morning, Mr. Bradley. You're looking rather happy this morning," he said with a knowing smile. He had been Ethan's pilot for years and he'd never seen him this chipper in the morning. The man was all smiles. _Looks like somebody got lucky last night_ he thought. And knowing Ethan's reputation as being an unrepentant bachelor, whoever she was had to be someone special considering his huge grin.

"Good morning, Shirley," Ethan nodded as he greeted the flight attendant and turned his attention to the pilot. "I am happy, Jeff. Happier than a woodpecker in a lumberyard. How are the kids?" He asked making small talk as he handed his bag to Shirley.

"They're doing well, sir. The weather looks good for the flight. We're all set to take off and should be arriving in New York in no more than two hours." Jeff replied.

"Sounds good," he replied and walked to the middle of the plane and taking a seat in one of the luscious tan leather seats and buckled his seat belt. After the plane reached altitude, Shirley came around and offered him a choice of magazines to read, but he declined. He remembered the paper that the attendant from the airport gave him and reached in his pocket to unfold it and see what it was. It probably wasn't anything important, because he didn't remember putting a folded sheet of paper in his bag but he checked anyway out of simple curiosity. Nothing in his 43 years of living could have possibly prepared him for what he read as he opened the sheet of paper. "What in the hell is this?" He absentmindedly asked aloud as he read through the items.

Shirley returned to his seat assuming that he'd called for her. "Was there something you needed, Mr. Bradley? Perhaps you'd like something to drink? Water? Coffee? Tea?" She asked him noticing that he never looked up from the sheet of paper.

"I'm sorry, what?" He asked finally looking up at her wondering why she was there. He hadn't even noticed that she had returned; he was too busy trying to wrap his mind around what he was reading.

"I asked if you would like something to drink," she answered waiting for his reply.

He looked down at the list again. Yeah, he _definitely_ needed a drink. "I'll take a scotch. Clean, please."

Shirley wanted to comment on his troubling choice of brown liquor so early in the morning, but bit her tongue. Whatever it was on the sheet of paper he was holding had him frazzled. She prepared and served his drink and left him to his own devices.

He folded and unfolded the sheet again, nervous energy making him fiddle with the paper. It most definitely didn't belong to him and now he wished that the attendant hadn't found it. This belonged to Jocelyn Carter, the woman he has spent the past two days with and was quickly and foolishly falling for. He wasn't even sure what to make of it as he re-read the items on the list. He was slightly amused at some of the items at the top, but as he got towards the end of the list he wasn't sure how to feel.

He wondered what her motivation was behind such a thing. He chuckled as he thought about that silly movie starring Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson- but those were two old men living out their last days. Jocelyn was a beautiful, vibrant woman that was full of life. _Is she dying? What could have driven her to write such a list? No wonder she was trying to end things with me_, he thought ruefully. He was just another item on this list to her.

Ethan sighed as he ran his hand through his hair and looked at the clouds outside the window. He really liked Joss. She was strong, independent, beautiful, smart, sassy, funny, and so many other adjectives that he could go on and on about. He felt as if they made a connection and he bonded with her in a way that he hadn't with any of the women he'd been with lately.

Ordinarily after he bedded the women he dated, he ended the relationship soon after. He knew he was labeled as some playboy with a preoccupation for short term flings, but he really didn't care. He hadn't been in a serious long term relationship with a woman since his college sweetheart, Sabrina.

Ethan thought about his relationship with Sabrina and how it all started. Sabrina was a beautiful woman with almond shaped dark brown eyes, high cheekbones, full pouty lips, soft skin that was the color of cafe au lait, and unruly curly black hair. She was a sprinter for the track team and had a tall athletic body; yet she couldn't hide those curves. He'd seen her at parties and around campus but never had the nerve to approach her. He admired her from afar as he watched her turn down one guy after another.

One day as he was walking back to his dorm after baseball practice, he saw her running by herself around the track. He couldn't stop staring at her; she was so graceful. He didn't know what came over him, but he walked over to the track and ran to catch up with her. Once he reached her, he slowed down to match her pace.

"Hi."

She gave him a curious look and replied, "Hello."

He couldn't find the words to say so he continued to jog beside her and tried his best not to stare at her. Sensing that he didn't have anything else to say and not wanting to be bothered, Sabrina picked up her pace to a full sprint to get away from him. He ran faster to catch up to her and once he was next to her he matched her pace again.

"I'm Ethan," he said trying not to sound so winded, but failing miserably. Sabrina stopped abruptly, looked at him, and sighed putting her hands on her hips. He was grateful to no longer have to run and stopped soon after she did, turning to face her.

"Is there something you wanted, Ethan?" she asked, annoyed that he was interrupting her workout.

"Um..." _Come on Ethan, man up!_ "I was just wondering if you'd like to go out sometime. Like for dinner or something?" He was glad to get that out finally but braced himself for the rejection.

"I don't date white guys," she replied flatly as she started walking towards the bleachers to get her water bottle and backpack. Her workout came to an abrupt end and she was clearly annoyed.

"Well, we have something in common because I don't date white guys either," he said with a smirk.

She laughed and he thought it was the most beautiful sound. He stood there like a lovesick puppy and tried to think of something to make her laugh again. Before he could say anything else, she turned him down again. "Look, Ethan. You seem nice, but I'm not interested," she said as she looked down and back up at him with a shy smile. She gathered her things and walked away leaving him at the track standing there watching her walk away.

He saw her several times again on the track and each time he would run with her and ask her out, and each time she would turn him down. Until the one time she finally said yes.

"If I go out with you just once will you stop messing up my workouts?" she asked in exasperation.

He flashed his best smile at her and could see her blushing. "Yep." He was nothing, if not persistent. Especially when it came to getting what he wanted. And he wanted her.

She sighed, glaring and smiling at him at the same time. "Fine."

And things took off from there. Months later he told her he loved her, but thinking back to when she finally said yes to going out with him looking at him the way she did, Ethan realized he fell for her at that moment. Sabrina wasn't just his college sweetheart. She was the woman he was supposed to marry and grow old with, but she was killed in a car accident two months into their engagement. He focused on getting his business off the ground after her passing, engrossing himself in his work to distract from the heartache. Although he had moved on since her death, he hadn't wanted to get serious with anyone after that. Never really gave it a second thought.

But Jocelyn stirred something in him that he hadn't felt since Sabrina and he wanted to see where it could go. He realized that they moved pretty fast on getting physical, but he found himself wanting to step back and take things slow; see if he could build something with her. That's why he wanted to make sure they kept in touch with each other and see how things went upon their return to the city.

He was at a crossroads now. End things as they were and chalk it up as just a fling or continue to see her and try to see if the connection he felt with her in Atlanta was real. He took a sip of his scotch as he made his decision. He put the crystal tumbler down and took the cell phone out of the front pocket of his blazer; scrolling through his list of contacts. Once he found the name he needed, he picked up the phone in the plane and dialed the number. A smoky, feminine voice answered on the third ring.

"Zoe Morgan," she answered, as her driver opened the door to the backseat of the car and she climbed in. She was on her way to a Sunday brunch appointment with a client.

"Zoe! It's Ethan Bradley. How have you been?"

"I'm well, Ethan. It's been quite a while since I've heard from you. How can I be of assistance?"

"I need you to look into someone for me. A woman named Jocelyn Carter. She's a homicide detective but I'm unsure of which precinct."

"Detective Carter?" she asked, as her curiosity was now peaked.

"Yeah, do you know her?" asked Ethan, not entirely surprised if she did.

Zoe was a woman who held her cards closely to her chest. In her line of work, one can never forget a name or a face. She remembered briefly meeting Carter while helping John on a case. He didn't even have the manners to formally introduce them so she introduced herself as his wife. The look on Carter's face was amusing and she got a kick out of watching John squirm.

She remembered wondering what it all meant, but never put any additional thought into it; especially after the night before she and John got 'divorced'. Which reminded her that it had been a while since she'd 'played poker' with John and she had an itch that needed to be scratched; Zoe made a mental note to give him a call later and ask him to meet her for drinks.

"No. I don't know her, but the name sounds familiar," she smoothly lied and decided to deflect and find out why he wanted info on Carter. "Why do you want information on a homicide detective? I'm a fixer not a defense lawyer. I try to keep my hands clean when it comes to dead bodies, though it is my business to know where they're buried."

Ethan knew all too well about her resourcefulness. That's why he called her. "I can assure you that I am in no such trouble. I need you to find out anything and everything you can about her down to the most mundane details. Also, I know that cops have to take yearly physicals. So if you can get a hold of the records from her most recent physical that would be great."

Zoe wondered why he needed all of this. She had a few contacts in the higher levels of the NYPD, but she didn't know how much she could get out of them or how long it would take. "Exactly when will you need all of this?"

"No later than Tuesday morning. As a matter of fact, if you can get it to me by tomorrow evening, I'll triple your fee."

Zoe heard dollar signs chime in her ears. "I'll get on it as soon as possible."

"I assume that you will apply the utmost level of discretion for this?"

"Of course, I'll call you as soon as everything is ready."

"Thanks Zoe. I'll talk to you soon," he said and disconnected the call.

The driver stopped the car in front of the entrance of Hearth, a restaurant known for its delicious brunch fare and strong mimosas. Zoe exited the vehicle and walked inside the restaurant looking for her client. She found him seated at a table in the center of the restaurant waving in her direction and made her way over to him.

"Good morning, Ms. Morgan. So glad you could join me on such short notice," he said with a smile.

"Good morning, Mr. Quinn. I'm always available for a decent brunch. Especially when I'm not covering the tab."

Alonzo Quinn gave a smile that didn't reach his eyes and continued, ready to get down to business. "Before we order, let's get to the matter at hand," Quinn said as he gave Zoe a manila folder.

"It has been brought to my attention that the FBI has been looking into Bradley Capital for what looks like some sort of Ponzi scheme related to one of its subsidiaries. Seeing as how Ethan Bradley was a major contributor to our campaign, we want to know as much as possible about the investigation so that we can get in front of the story and set the narrative if something leaks to the press. We don't want any bad press rubbing off on the mayor's office because of a connection with a generous donor."

"Wouldn't it just be easier to get your information from Bradley directly?" Zoe asked looking through the information in the folder. She wasn't quite buying what Quinn was trying to sell her.

"We've tried to talk to him but have had very poor results from those efforts. He's not providing full disclosure, so now we have to take a different route to get the information we need. Do you think you can look into it?" he asked, taking a sip of coffee.

"I'll look into it," she replied closing the folder and reaching for her mimosa. _This day just got interesting_, she thought as she took a sip of the fruity drink.

* * *

_(13 days ago)_

Joss sat in the booth in the back of the diner facing the door waiting for Fusco to enter. She'd managed to get quite a few things done and even caught a small nap. She spoke to her mother and let her know that she was working a sting tonight so Taylor would stay the night with her. Her mom told her that she wanted to leave as early as possible tomorrow morning to make the 13 hour drive, so she'd better not work all night. She downed the last of her coffee and shook her leg to quell the anxiety she was starting to feel. _Maybe I shouldn't go through with this. I should just go home and try to get some more sleep. So what if HR kills Elias? I don't owe him anything. He took Taylor and he tried to have me killed. Why am I even thinking about going through with this?_ She thought to herself as she continued to look at the door waiting for Fusco to make an appearance.

"Would you like a refill on your coffee?" the waitress asked Joss after she approached the table with a carafe preparing to add more coffee to Joss' now empty mug.

"Yeah sure," Joss replied distractedly still looking at the door at the front of the restaurant. The waitress poured the refill and left Joss to wait. She didn't have to wait much longer as she finally saw Fusco come in looking around for her. He spotted her in the back booth of the restaurant and walked over to the table to take a seat across from her. He had a look of confusion and annoyance on his face as he looked at her waiting for her to start the conversation. She did ask him to meet her out here after all.

"Thanks for meeting me here, Fusco. Glad you could make it," she started.

Fusco didn't care for any sort of small talk at the moment and went straight to questioning. "Carter, what the hell is going on? I came in late this morning to find you not at your desk. And then I hear that you're under investigation with the IAB. They said it was about a shooting that happened last night. What the hell happened? Why were you with Terney? I thought you were headed home yesterday right after I left." He was not pleased with what he heard around the precinct water cooler about his partner. He knew he needed to hear it directly from her.

Joss sighed in exasperation. "I swear, those guys gossip worse than high school mean girls. But look, that's beside the point." She stopped as the waitress arrived to take their order. After she left, Joss leaned forward over the table and continued in a lowered voice.

"Listen, Terney is dirty. I know he's working for HR and they have something big planned for tonight. They've worked out a prison transfer tonight to get Elias out of Rikers so they can kill him."

Fusco looked blankly at Joss, still waiting to hear what was so important. He couldn't care less about Elias and his upcoming demise and all he really wanted to do was to stay out of it. He was trying to lay low after being in HR's crosshairs. When she didn't add anything else, he spoke. "Yeah, so? Why should you care? Didn't Elias come after you and your son? Why should I care about him after that? Actually, I don't care. Let the trash take out the trash. Besides, you still haven't told me what happened last night. How do you know Terney is HR and how do you know what they plan to do?"

"It's a long story," Joss said looking down at the table.

"Well, I've got time to hear it so spit it out. Besides, you have that look in your eyes. It's the same look Mr. Happy gets right before he does something stupid. Or dangerous. Or both." Joss shot him a look and he shot one back at her defiantly. "What happened last night?"

Joss told Fusco about last night's shooting and how the suspect's weapon was moved. She told him about the uniformed officer she suspected moved the weapon and went on to tell him about Terney and how he set her up. How he lured her out to the scene because he told her it was a lead on Beecher. How he later threatened her, Taylor, and Fusco in the interrogation room that morning.

"He said he didn't like killing women so I guess this was his way of getting me out of the way," Joss continued; the memory of Terney's words leaving a bitter taste in her mouth. "So after his phone rang, I cloned it before he walked out of the room. That's how I found out about them trying to take out Scarface. Now they're gonna finish the job by taking out Elias. HR is working with the Russians. The last piece on the chess board to knock down is Elias. Once they take him out the Russians will take over the city. You think it's been crazy with all these murders over the past two weeks? Well, that would be child's play compared to the bloodshed that would happen once the Russians take over the city. And they'll have HR in their back pocket to cover up crimes or look the other way as they both line their pockets."

The waitress returned with their food and placed the plates on the table in front of them. Neither touched their food, allowing the information Joss shared to sink in. Fusco picked up a french fry and took a bite of it, trying to figure out what they should do. Fusco was thoroughly appalled with what he found out and planned to definitely have a talk with some people when he got back to the station. The problem was trying to make sure Carter stayed out of it. If she was still under investigation, then she needed to lay low. They both did.

"You try calling Glasses? Maybe he can get into the system and delay the prison transfer. Or what about Wonderboy? He's probably more equipped for something like this. Elias wouldn't even be alive if he hadn't saved him over a year ago. Maybe he should clean up the mess. It wouldn't be the first mess he's had to clean up." Fusco knew he was pulling at straws. Neither of them had heard from the dynamic duo for a while. He knew Carter was up to something, but hoped they didn't have to go through with this crazy plan he was sure she had already cooked up.

"I tried calling Finch a few times to try to get a safe house set up to hold Elias until we can get him back to Riker's safely, but he didn't pick up. That's something he's never done, so there must be something going on. When I spoke to John this morning, I heard police sirens in the background. I think whatever they're dealing with has something to do with how they get their intel on the people we help. I really don't think they could help us tonight if they wanted to." Joss looked down at her plate and picked at her sandwich but paused as what Lionel said finally sunk in.

"Wait… Fusco," she was so focused on trying to get Fusco on the same page with her, that she nearly missed what he said. "What did you mean when you said this wouldn't be the first mess John's had to clean up?"

Fusco leaned forward and lowered his voice. "You know- the whole thing with Stills. I'm sure you had to talk him into it," he stated, confused about why she would have to ask. Surely John had told her, right? She would have been the only one able to talk him into moving the body. That's why he finally came through for him on this when things were starting to look dire and he was grateful for that. Did he make the wrong assumption? It wasn't John that moved Stills?

Joss shook her head as she was trying to piece together what he was saying not wanting to believe what she knew he was going to tell her. "No….I spoke to John about everything going on with your investigation, but he was uh… hmph _busy_," she said bitterly trying not to remember the conversation or what she decided to do later that night.

"So if he didn't move Stills, than who di-" Fusco stopped but not before it was too late. John hadn't told her about Stills and now he just spilled the beans, unwittingly stepping into a shit storm.

Joss looked at Fusco incredulously. "Fusco, _I_ moved Stills. Why would you think John did it and why would it be his mess to clean up?" She already had a guess at the answer, but needed to hear it for herself.

_Shit, shit, shit_, Fusco thought. He decided a non-answer was the best approach and took a sudden interest in his food.

"Oh, no Fusco. You don't get to do that. You don't get to just drop it. Why would it be John's mess to clean up?" Joss asked growing more frustrated by the minute.

"Listen, it doesn't matter anymore. What good is it to bring up stuff from the past? Why should it matter?" He said still avoiding her eyes.

"Just tell me what happened, Fusco," she replied quietly. She appeared calm on the outside, but felt anger storming inside. _This is just something else John couldn't trust me with. None of them trusted me enough to tell me_ she thought as she braced herself for what Fusco had to say.

Fusco told her about what happened with Stills and the reason why John shot him. Explained to her that John used his gun to kill Stills and made him bury the body. "You remember when I told you I was blackmailed into helping them? Well, that was how it all got started," Fusco finished pushing his plate aside; his food remaining untouched. Joss couldn't eat much of her food either. She was already wired from the caffeine in the coffee that was now cold and the adrenaline pumping through her veins, preparing herself for what she had to do tonight; but whatever appetite she once had was gone now.

Joss was disgusted, but not nearly as surprised as she thought she would be. Under normal circumstances, she would talk to John about it and try to get his point of view; have another talk about trust over a drink. Not this time. She had done so much for him- for _them_ and this was how they decided to pay it forward. They couldn't even give her the respect to tell her the full truth about Fusco and Stills' murder.

She knew they were never going to tell her how they got their information, but damn it this was about her partner. Why keep this from her? John could have told her about Stills at any point between when it happened up to the night she moved the body. At this point, she was fed up and tired of the bullshit. Although they seemed to be getting back on familiar ground, their…._friendship_ was strained. She didn't even want to hear what he had to say at this point. She was _done_. She set aside the feelings of resentment and decided to push forward with why she had Fusco meet her at this diner.

"Listen, Fusco" Joss started as the waitress came back around to check on them and noticed the barely touched food on their plates. "Was there something wrong with the food?" She asked with concern noticing the tension between the two patrons at the table.

"Nothing's wrong. Just lost my appetite," Joss responded blankly. "Can we get the checks, please?"

"Sure thing," the waitress said as she cleared the plates from the table and walked away.

Joss reached down in her purse and took out the two burner phones she purchased, among other things, on her way to meet Fusco. She gave him one of the phones "Here, take this. I preset the first speed dial to this phone," she held up and pointed to the other burner phone in her hand. "I need you to get me a safe house or even a motel room of some sort that is out of the way. Once you have it set up, give me a call or better yet text me the address. I need to get out of here."

She tossed a few bills on the table and slid out of the booth. Fusco caught her by the arm, stopping her forward movement. "Wait, Carter. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about this. I honestly thought you already knew. You didn't have to do what you did for me and you don't need to do this, either. Just let it go," he pleaded with her.

"Just do this for me, Fusco. That's all I ask. Try to have a place ready for me tonight. I'll fill you in on everything later," she said as she removed his hand from her arm and walked out of the diner not stopping or looking back to see the look of concern on Fusco's face as he watched her leave.

* * *

_(3 days ago)_

Joss flipped page after page of the third book Janice gave her to find the perfect cut. Everything was too short or too boring or too provocative. How hard can it be to find a simple hair cut? She could tell Janice was getting annoyed with her. They had moved from her home office to her in-house hair salon in the finished basement. Apparently she used this for her VIP clients on the days the main salon wasn't open and they wanted more privacy. Joss joked that she thought Janice had moved beyond being a "kitchen beautician" and that earned her a glare that could match one of her own.

"Joss, are you ever going to find a style you like?" Janice asked impatiently as she watched Joss close the third book in frustration.

"Maybe this was a bad idea. I don't have to do this. Maybe just a simple wash, blow out, and a trim will be fine."

Janice looked at her incredulously. "Um, no." She turned the chair so that she could really get a good look at her cousin. She studied the shape of her face and took Joss' hair out of the messy bun so that it would fall down around her face. "Hmmm," she said as the inspiration finally hit her.

Joss gave her a questioning look. "Why are you staring at me and what are you thinking?" she asked nervously. She could see the wheels turning in Janice's head and when she gets an idea, somehow Joss is the one that ends up doing something out of character. _Like writing that silly bucket list _she thought.

"I know what kind of style to give you. It won't be too long, won't be too short, and it will be manageable considering how busy you are trying to save the world," she added an exaggerated eye roll with that and continued. "You just have to trust me. Do you trust me?" she finished looking at Joss expectantly.

Joss thought about it. She had a hard time with trusting people when it came to work and even when it came to her barely existent dating life. But she trusted her family, and right now she trusted her cousin. She was the expert in this matter after all. "Sure, I trust you. Just don't get scissor happy," she said with a nervous smile.

"Oh, come on Jossy-bear! I _will_ get scissor happy! Every stylist loves getting scissor happy. Just trust me to hook you up. So let's go get you shampooed and conditioned and you won't be able to see anything until I'm done. Okay?"

"I feel like I'm on the makeover show 'What Not to Wear'." Janice shot her a look. "Okay, okay. Let's get started."

* * *

Janice pulled her Mercedes into the parking space close to the hangar in Brown Field and cut the engine. She looked over to Joss to see her fidgeting _again_ with her hair. "Joss, stop! It looks great. I promise, when you get back home you're gonna turn heads."

"That's what I'm afraid of," Joss muttered as she looked at herself in the mirror of the sun visor. The cut was beautiful. It was a simple and sleek asymmetrical bob cut that was longer in the front and shorter in the back. It shaped her face in a way that drew attention to her apple shaped cheeks and large brown eyes. She smiled at her reflection. Her cousin knew what she was doing.

"Well come on, let's get you on that plane before you try to bolt again."

"Is that why you drove me here? So that I wouldn't change my mind? I could have driven mom's car here on my own."

"Nope, I arranged for Aunt Vicky's car to be picked up from my house."

"You mean your McMansion?"

"You still got jokes, I see. No, I meant _my house_. The one that I will be turning into a home filled with pretty curly haired babies after Gabe and I tie the knot," she said looking at the engagement ring on her finger. "Just make sure you get fitted for your bridesmaid dress," she winked at Joss and got out of the car. Joss followed her lead and also got out of the car.

"Wait a minute. I'm a bridesmaid now? You don't ask me, you just tell me?"

"Of course, Jossy-bear. Is that a problem?" She smiled at her cousin.

"No, you know it isn't a problem. I just had to call you out," she said with a smile. "Let me get my bags, so I can get on that plane," she said as she looked over to the private jet waiting for her on the tarmac. This whole experience seemed so surreal. She'd flown commercial plenty of times, but this was her first experience on a private plane.

The attendant approached them before Joss could even open the back passenger side door to remove her bags from the back seat. "Good afternoon, ladies. Please make your way to the plane and allow me to get those for you."

Janice looked at the attendant curiously. "You know, I've never seen you before. Tony is usually here. Is he out? What's your name?"

"My name is Marcus," he replied as he removed Joss' overnight bag and suitcase from the car. He looked up at Joss and froze. "Oh my gosh. Are you…. are you?" He couldn't even get the words out from his excitement.

Joss looked at him as if he had two heads. She wondered what his problem was and why he seemed so excited. "Am I what?"

"Aren't you Taraji P. Henson? The actress? My wife loves that 'Think Like A Man' movie."

"I'm sorry, but no. I'm not her." Joss could hear Janice snickering and shot her a look.

He gave her an apologetic look. "I'm sorry miss. It's just that you look so much like her with the haircut and everything." Joss gave a polite smile but was cringing inside.

"Sorry to have dashed your hopes Marcus," Janice replied with laughter still in her voice. "My cousin Jocelyn Carter is the only one getting on the plane, and those aren't the only bags you'll have to carry." She popped the trunk of the car and lifted it to reveal an impressive collection of shopping bags and shoe boxes.

"Janice, what the hell is this?" Joss asked in confusion and irritation.

She knew her cousin would be upset, so she walked around to the other side of the car to Joss and put her arm around her shoulders. She led her away from the car and towards the plane. "Joss, do you remember when we went shopping for a little retail therapy a couple days ago?"

"Yes, and I remember clearly telling you not to get me anything from those pricy boutiques and that if I found something I would get it myself," she replied angrily.

"I know, and you did purchase a few cute pieces." She sighed and stopped their movement to face her cousin. "Don't be mad at me Jossy-bear. I told you I had Gabe's black card, so we could have some fun. And you tried on all those cute dresses, and suits, and skirts, and blouses and you looked great in them. We were having so much fun that while you were in the dressing room, I made sure to tell the salesperson to ring them up so that I could pick them up later. I just wanted to do something for you to lift your spirits. You seemed so down when you first got here. Granny is always telling us not to block our blessings, so don't block this."

Joss laughed and shook her head. "Wow! Really Janice? I can't believe you put grandma in your closing arguments."

"It worked didn't it?" Janice grinned. "Come on, girl. Let's get you on that plane. You've got a movie to shoot and we don't want you running late like some diva," she joked.

"Shut-up, Janice." They both laughed and continued their walk to the plane.

* * *

Joss sat back in the plush leather seat of the jet as she waited for her mother and Taylor to enter the plane. She looked out the window to see them walking on the tarmac on their way to up to the plane. Judging by the curious look on her mother's face, she knew she was going to have a lot of explaining to do.

She stood when she saw them walk into the plane and went to give Taylor a hug. "Whoa, mom! Look at you! You cut your hair? It's different, but I like it. You look nice, mom. You kinda look like that actress from that Benjamin Button movie. What's her name again?"

She shook her head smiling at him. He wasn't the only one to say that today. "Just find a seat and buckle up for the flight. Don't worry about my celebrity look alike," she joked with him. He went towards the back of the plane and chose a seat while Shirley gave him an iPad to keep himself entertained on the short flight.

She turned to face her mom and gave her a hug as well. After their embrace, Joss returned to her seat by the window. Her mother sat in the seat directly across from her and gave her a questioning look as they buckled their seat belts and prepared for take-off.

Vicky didn't say a word to her daughter until they reached altitude. She noticed the changes in her daughter compared to how she looked earlier in the week. She looked well rested and happier, but she saw the worry in her eyes. Whatever it was that was going on with her must either have something to do with why they are on this plane or whatever she's been dealing with at home. She was tired of the guessing game and decided to ask.

"Joss," she started, waiting for her daughter to look at her.

She didn't look at her. She didn't want to look at her. She continued to look out of the window and replied with a "Hmmm?"

"You wanna tell me what's going on?"

"No."

"Can you at least look at me?"

"No."

"Jocelyn," she said in a tone she used when she meant business. It seemed like that worked because Joss finally turned away from the window and looked at her.

"What is it, mom? What do you want to know?" she asked tiredly. She hoped that they would just be able to enjoy the flight and make it back home without issue. Those hopes were now dashed as she prepared herself for the interrogation from her mother.

"What exactly are you into that would have us going home on a private plane? Whose plane is this? What's with the new look? What has been going on with you? Is it something at work? Just talk to me, baby girl. Tell me what's wrong," she pleaded with her daughter. Vicky knew that Joss was going through something, but just like she always does, she kept it bottled in. Joss had always been a strong person, but she knew that whatever it was, it was affecting her. She had been distant for the past few weeks. She was here, but not _here_ and her behavior and now this change in her look reflected that.

"Mom, I promise I'm fine. I'm not _into_ anything at all. This plane belongs to Ethan Bradley. He is a friend and business partner of Gabriel, Janice's fiancé. He was nice enough to offer a ride home on the plane. That's all. There's nothing more to it than that mom," she finished looking out of the window again.

"Nothing more to it? So this Ethan guy just lets you and your family fly on his private plane and ship my car home all out of the goodness of his heart? Just because he's nice? I'm not buying it."

"Well, mom I'm not trying to sell you anything. You asked and I answered, so can we drop it please?" Her mom didn't give a response, just looked at her. "Listen, mom. We're on a private jet and we're gonna be home in like two hours. So just roll with it and enjoy yourself." Joss sat back into the leather seat and looked out of the window again. She hated the feeling she got when she was under her mom's scrutiny.

Vicky wasn't entirely satisfied with Joss' answers, but decided to let it go and went with what she hoped would be a safer topic. "I like your hair cut. It's very flattering. Did Janice do that?"

"Yeah, she worked her magic," she said fluffing her hair out a bit with her fingers. At that moment, Shirley stopped by to offer refreshments.

"Hello, ladies. I've been told to make sure that you all are very well taken care of. I've brought an assortment of fruit and cheese and some champagne. Is there anything else I can get you? Would you like something else?"

"No, this is terrific," Vicky replied as she accepted the crystal flute of champagne and took a sip. "Thank you very much."

"Not a problem. I'll just leave this here. Please let me know if you need anything else."

"Do you have any chocolate strawberries?" Vicky asked earnestly.

Shirley gave a big smile. "Well, aren't you a woman after my own heart. I'm pretty sure we have it, but let me see what I can find." She walked away and Vicky turned to see Joss looking at her with a smirk.

"What? You're the one who told me to roll with it and enjoy myself. So that's what I'm going to do," she said as she smiled and took another sip of the champagne. "I could get used to this, you know."

Joss laughed and reached for her glass and took a sip of the champagne. _I could get used to this too, _she thought to herself and smiled.

* * *

Joss closed the door to her apartment and locked the bolt after Taylor and the driver carried the last of her bags in. She had no idea what she was going to do with all these clothes and shoes, but she knew she would have fun figuring it out and smiled at the thought. She tossed her keys on the table next to the door and looked at the phone she left behind. She picked up her cell phone and saw she had a ton of missed calls and voicemails to check. Most of those missed calls came from an unknown number. She knew who those calls were from and decided that she would deal with that later. She put the phone back down on the table and walked to her bedroom and closed the door for privacy. She sat on the end of her bed, took the burner phone out of her purse and dialed Ethan's number. He answered on the second ring.

"Jocelyn! Good to hear from you. Are you home now?"

"Yes, I'm here. The flight was wonderful. Thank you so much for the offer. I really didn't want to go through that long road trip. Now, Taylor and I have time to unpack and settle in and he'll be able to go back to school tomorrow without being so tired. I really appreciate it, Ethan. My mom also thanks you." Joss chuckled. "You should have seen her when Shirley came around with the champagne. She thought she was living the high life."

Ethan laughed, "Your mother sounds like a woman after my own heart."

"Ha! That's what Shirley said when my mom asked for chocolate covered strawberries. I can't believe she did that. It was too funny!"

"Sounds like she's a bit of a firecracker, like my mother. I like her already." The conversation fell into a comfortable silence and Ethan looked at the time on his watch. It was still early enough for dinner and he took a chance to see if she would join him.

"Hey, Joss."

"Yeah?"

"It's still kinda early. You wanna grab a bite to eat? Just a casual dinner. I know you and Taylor probably haven't eaten anything yet, seeing as how you just got in," he hedged hoping she wouldn't turn him down.

Joss inwardly sighed. "Ethan…."

He cut her off, "You know what, never mind. You're tired and you probably had plans to get takeout and fall asleep early, right?"

Joss chuckled. "Yeah, I did." She paused and decided to do what she couldn't do in Atlanta. "Ethan, whatever this is between us, can't continue." She didn't hear anything from the other line and thought he hung up on her. "Ethan, are you there?"

"Yeah, I'm here."

"Did you hear what I said?"

"I did."

"Well?"

"What am I supposed to say, Joss? I like you. A lot. And I know you like me. We're just two people that are attracted to each other getting to know each other. What's the problem?"

"It's just that…I don't know. I wasn't… This wasn't supposed to be…" Joss was having a hard time finding the words to say. He was right. She did like him. She liked him a lot. She also liked someone else a lot. Someone she was angry with, wasn't speaking to, and was avoiding at the moment. _That_ was the problem.

"Tell you what, have dinner with me tomorrow. We'll see how it goes and we can take it from there."

Joss decided a stall tactic was best. "I don't know. Tomorrow's not good for me."

"Well, let me give you a call tomorrow and we'll set something up. Sound good?"

She smiled. This man wasn't going anywhere and she had to admit to herself that she liked it. She liked that he was fighting for her and not letting her run away. He was straightforward and that was just one of the reasons she liked him. "Sounds perfect."

"Okay, then I'll talk to you tomorrow. Goodnight Jocelyn."

"Goodnight Ethan." She disconnected the call and fell back on the bed staring at the ceiling. _What am I getting myself into?_


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

_(13 days ago)_

Joss watched as the NYPD transfer van pulled over to the side of the road while another car that she assumed belonged to Yogorov parked behind it. She parked her car about a quarter of a mile up the road away from view and got out the vehicle to follow the path she saw Elias, Terney, and Yogorov take into the woods. As she caught up to them, Joss walked closer to where the three men stood. She was now close enough to hear part of their conversation.

"No," Elias shook his head as he spoke to Terney. "You don't get to talk to me. I'm true to what I am." He turned to look at Yogorov. "Like my friend Mr. Yogorov here. I killed his father, he kills me. Fair is fair. But you…you're a… you're an _oath breaker_. You're a _worm_." Elias looked at Terney in contempt.

"I think that's enough of you," Terney replied in disdain. He placed the hood back over Elias' head, stepped back and pulled his gun. "You piece of crap." He raised and pointed his gun at Elias ready to end this once and for all.

Joss had hoped she wouldn't have to do this, but she knew that this wasn't supposed to be the end for Elias; whether he thought it was fair or not. She shot Terney before he could fire his gun. Yogorov turned to her direction to take a shot and she disabled him as well by firing a second shot, hitting him in the shoulder. Acting on pure adrenaline, she took long strides to walk over to the group with her gun still drawn- ready to fire again if she needed to. She walked up to Terney as he knelt before her begging for his life.

"Please, I.. I got a family," he pleaded with fear in his eyes.

_Oh really? A family? You think I should spare you because you have a family? What about my family? You weren't saying that when you threatened Taylor you backstabbing son of a bitch!_ Joss reached back as far as she could and hit Terney vigorously with the butt of her gun. Knowing that she would agonize over her actions later, she lived in the moment and savored how good it felt to see him tumble to the ground in pain. She turned to grab Elias and led him to her car.

Joss opened the back passenger side door and let him in, closing the door before circling around the front of her car. She removed the ski mask she was wearing and looked around to see if anyone else was around. After seeing that there was no one following them, she got into the car.

Elias removed the hood from his head to find out who the mystery person was that saved his life. He looked at the woman sitting in the driver's seat, genuinely surprised. "Detective Carter?" He smiled. "What a funny old world. Where are we going?"

"I don't know." She looked at her cell phone waiting to get a call from Fusco, but still hadn't heard from him yet. He tried to talk her out of this during lunch today, just like John had earlier this morning. She hoped that he wouldn't leave her hanging. She already felt alone in this and didn't want her feelings of being alone to become reality. She started the car, put it in drive, and moved forward not yet knowing her destination.

There was no reasonable explanation as to why she did this. She already had a target on her back with HR, and if they ever found out who was responsible for taking Elias, she would be a target for the Russian mafia as well. And this time there would be no set ups or IAB investigations; they would surely kill her. But her gut told her that even though Elias may not be the man she wanted to save, he didn't deserve to be executed either. He'd been charged, tried, and found guilty for his crimes and the punishment given to him by the court on behalf of the people of New York was to serve his time in Riker's. His punishment was not supposed to be some twisted idea of street justice. After ten minutes of aimlessly driving west with no real destination, Elias finally spoke.

"You know, Carter, I would have never expected something like this from you. Why'd you do it? Why did you save me?" Elias asked, turning from watching the scenery go by out of the back passenger window. He made eye contact with her in the rear view mirror.

"Better the devil you know," she replied wearily. She broke their eye contact in the mirror and focused on the road. _Come on, Fusco! Come through for me on this_, she thought in exasperation.

"You didn't have to do this, considering everything that's happened between us. And you're working alone? This seems like something better suited for John. But I suppose working with him for as long as you have, he would start to be sort of an influence. Where is he, by the way?" Elias asked with a gleam of hope in his eyes. He had taken a liking to John ever since he saved his life over a year ago.

Joss didn't answer him and continued to drive. Her phone finally beeped, alerting her that she had a new text message. It was from Fusco:

_**Bayside Anchor Motel**_

_**3450 Linden Pl **_

_**Flushing, NY 11354**_

_**Room 128**_

She sighed in relief. He'd come through for her and now she had a destination. The only problem now is what to do with Elias after they got him settled.

* * *

Fusco opened the door to the cheap motel room and watched as Carter ushered Elias inside. He looked outside to see if they had been followed and after not seeing anything suspicious, he closed and locked the door. Carter gave Elias two shopping bags.

"Here. Take these. These are fresh clothes so you're not walking around in your prison gear. I didn't know your size so if it doesn't fit, deal with it."

Elias grinned as he accepted the bags. "Gee, Carter you thought of everything." Joss sighed and rolled her eyes at him in response.

"Can we at least order something to eat? I'm starving and judging by how thin you've gotten since we last saw each other you look like you could eat something as well. Have you been eating, Carter? What's got you so stressed?"

Elias was genuinely curious. He'd heard about Beecher's murder and knew that Carter was dating him. He wondered if that was what was going on with her or was there more than what was on the surface. Contrary to popular belief, prisoners are a bunch of gossips and it has always been in his best interest to stay in the know about his enemies- or in this case an enemy turned ally. Even when it came to the most frivolous information he made sure he knew about it.

"Just go freshen up and get changed." She'd had enough of him and his questions and she refused to let him get in her head. Joss shot him a look and he decided to drop it. He went to the tiny bathroom and closed the door behind him. Once the shower started, Fusco decided to speak.

"Carter, what exactly are we doing? We can't keep him here. Once word gets out that Elias is back on the streets, all hell is gonna break loose." Fusco was exasperated and annoyed with this entire situation. He didn't want for Carter or himself to get involved with this. Especially now, seeing how things were spiraling out of control between the Russians and Elias.

Joss paced back and forth in front of the bed. She'd spent a majority of her time figuring out how to rescue Elias and that part of her plan had gone off without a hitch. What would they do now that they had him? Well, she hadn't really thought it through. She stopped pacing and sat on the foot of the bed as Fusco sat in the plastic chair by the window.

"I don't know. To be honest, I… I didn't really plan any further than getting Elias and finding a place to hide him in the meantime. And I thought you'd be able to get a better hideout than this. We're like sitting ducks, Fusco!"

"Hey, don't put this back on me. This was your bright idea! _You_ asked me to do this. This wasn't _my_ idea. If it were up to me I would've let him rot. Besides, I couldn't get a safe house without the brass asking too many questions." Fusco crossed his arms over his chest, "I told you to let this go… to leave this alone and now we're in the middle of a friggin mob war! How did you even get him out?"

Joss sighed as she replayed the scene from hours earlier in her head. It wasn't her best moment, that she was sure of, but she was already starting to regret what she did. "How I got Elias, isn't really anything to worry about. I need to figure out what I'm gonna do."

"Don't you mean, what _we're_ gonna do? I'm just as much involved in this as you are now," he said as he rubbed his hands down the sides of his face in frustration.

Fusco knew he was right. He just hoped that Carter could see it. She had gotten him involved in this mess and it was time for them to put their heads together to figure something out. He heard her stomach growl loudly before he could even think of anything. "I'm gonna go to the Chinese restaurant I saw on the way over here. You want anything?" she asked.

"I don't see how you can even think about eating right now. Although I bet they heard your stomach growling all the way in Brooklyn. You're not actually gonna get Elias something to eat are you?" Fusco wondered where her head was at right now. She seemed to be all over the place.

"Well actually, I was going to get something for myself. I haven't eaten anything since…" Joss tried to remember the last time she put anything in her stomach other than coffee. She'd picked over her lunch at the diner and couldn't remember really eating anything since yesterday. "I don't think I've really eaten anything all day."

Fusco looked at Carter, took a really good look at her. She looked exhausted. Worse than she had a couple days ago. She had bags under her eyes like she hadn't been sleeping well. Elias had commented earlier about how small she's gotten and Fusco had to admit that he had a point. Carter was always a petite woman, but she looked as if she's missed a few meals. And now her current behavior was questionable. If he didn't know anything about his partner, the one thing he knew for certain was that she didn't do anything half assed and never walked into a situation blind. However, she seemed to be flying by the seat of her pants when it came to this Elias scenario. Her cell phone rang, pulling him out of his thoughts.

He watched as Joss stared at the cell phone not answering it. After the third ring, Fusco asked, "You gonna answer that?" She took a deep breath and answered before it went to voice mail.

"Hey mom," she got up and paced the floor again. Back and forth. Back and forth. Fusco felt like he was gonna get seasick. He didn't know what was being said on the other end, but it looks like Carter was getting chewed out. He tucked that tidbit away in his mental Roladex for later. He could threaten to call Carter's mom when she got out of hand. It seemed like her mom was the only one that could really get through to her when she's being stubborn and thickheaded. Other than Wonderboy and even _he_ usually couldn't do that without pissing her off.

"Yeah, mom…about that. I don't think we'll be able to leave in the morning. As a matter of fact, this case just took a turn for the worse and I may not be able to get things settled until sometime in the middle of the week and -" she stopped pacing and listened as it appeared that her mother cut her off on the other end. Joss audibly sighed and began pacing again. "Mom…. Mom…. _Mom!_ Let me call you back. I gotta… I need to go. Mom! Okay. _Okay._ Okay… I'm hanging up now." Joss hung up the phone and continued pacing the floor. They both looked to the door of the bathroom as they heard the shower stop running.

"So what was that about?"

"What was _what_ about?" she asked, giving Fusco a warning look.

"That call with your mom. She keeping an eye on Taylor?"

She chuckled. "That was just my mom chewing me out about how I came up with the idea of this trip and she's making me feel guilty for backing out. About how I seem to be putting work first. How it's affecting Taylor and I don't see it. I never bring this stuff home with me. Or at least I try not to. You understand that, right? I know you don't bring this stuff home to Lee." She looked at him expectantly waiting for him to agree with her.

Fusco knew he was gonna regret this, but it was time to step up and take one for the team. Carter was in no shape to deal with this and he had to get her out of here. If she was caught, if they _both_ were caught with Elias in their possession, they could lose not only their jobs, but their lives over this. He knew she would want to do the right thing in finding a way to get Elias back in prison, but being the pragmatic of the two, he knew that probably wasn't the best option at this time. It wasn't good to let him run loose either, but if what she told him about HR teaming up with the Russians was true than they needed to look past enemy lines for help. HR had done enough to make both their lives miserable.

"You know… maybe your mom is right."

"What? Are you kidding me? Not you too, Fusco."

She looked hurt, but he didn't let that stop him. He needed her to leave and let him take care of this. And Wonderboy and Glasses were definitely getting a call regardless of her earlier protests in getting them involved. "Listen, Carter. Maybe you should get out of here. Go home, get some rest, and then go take this trip with your family. You need to lay low anyway and not get any more caught up in this than you already are."

She gave him a look of confusion mixed with anger. "Oh, so you think I can't handle this? This isn't your fight Fusco! Terney threatened me and I'm gonna be here to make sure this comes to an end, once and for all."

He walked to her and put his hands on her shoulders, looking at the bathroom door before looking her straight in the eyes. In a lowered voice he said, "Joss, you need to leave. You need to let me take care of this while you take care of yourself and things at home. You're not up to this, no matter what you say. I need my partner back, but right now she's not here. You need time to rest and get ready to get your head back in the game. You can't do that if you're constantly on the move and not giving yourself a chance to rest. Besides, you have a big red HR target on your back, so you need to stay outta their crosshairs. If I need you I'll call you, but you need to go. Right now."

She looked into his eyes trying to read him and see if there was doubt in his eyes, but it looked like his mind was made up. For once, she decided to give in and let someone else be in control. Not that it came to her easily. "Lionel, I can't let you do that."

"I'm your partner, Joss. Trust me to take care of this. Can you do that? Do you trust me?" He looked at her pleadingly, hoping that she would give in, just this once. He needed his partner back because the woman standing before him was a frazzled mess. He could see it in her eyes the moment she conceded.

"Okay. But, you call me on the burner phone if something happens. I mean it, Lionel," she said firmly but tiredly. Even she could hear the exhaustion in her voice and figured it was her adrenaline finally wearing off.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll call you. Just go. Now."

Joss collected her things and walked to the door of the motel room with trepidation. She turned to look back at Fusco, not sure if this was the right thing to do. Just as she was about to speak, she saw the door to the bathroom open and watched Elias step out with a curious expression on his face. She was sure he heard their conversation through the thin walls. She sighed as she turned to leave the room and didn't look back.

* * *

_(2 days ago)_

Joss woke up early with an unbelievable amount of energy. She didn't know if it was nervous energy or the energy you have after getting some much needed rest. All she knew is that it was early and she had to do something, anything to burn off this energy she had. She couldn't go back to sleep although she knew she could have. It was 5:30 in the morning and she didn't have to return to work for another week, but she couldn't just lie in bed all day either.

She went to the bathroom to freshen up and go through her morning ritual. Once she was done, she threw on an old Army t-shirt, a pair of jogging pants, and her running shoes. She decided that she would go for a run to burn off this energy. Maybe purchase a few things from the bodega around the corner to make a big breakfast for Taylor to start off the week with a bang. She smiled to herself as she found her mp3 player and headphones and went to grab her keys and her burner phone. She would be back before Taylor woke up. She usually had to drag him out of the bed most mornings anyway. She walked out the door and locked it behind her.

As she went down the steps of the stoop in front of her building, she noticed the sky was starting to lighten and change color- a sign that dawn was just on the horizon. She felt the chill in the air that New York couldn't seem to shake but thankfully, it wouldn't last. Spring had come roaring back in the city and the weather for the week called for sunshine and higher temperatures. Besides, she knew once she started to run, she would warm up rather quickly. She placed the ear buds in her ears and started her playlist. Mary J. Blige's "Just Fine" filtered in her ears and she found herself smiling as she found a comfortable jogging pace.

About an hour later, Joss came back from her run sweaty and spent, but she still felt good and had a renewed sense of exuberance. She felt…dare she say it, happy. Yes, she felt happier and lighter than she had over a week ago and was surprised to feel that way given the things she knew she had to sort out upon her return. She woke up Taylor and went to take a quick shower. Once she got out of the shower and changed into a pair of worn jeans and an old Milton University t-shirt, she went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast with the items she purchased at the store.

While making the batter for the chocolate chip pancakes, Taylor's favorite, she thought about what she should do for the day. She knew she needed to check her voice messages. She needed to meet up with Fusco to be briefed on everything that happened in her absence. She also knew that she needed to speak with John, but that could wait. _Maybe I can put that off until tomorrow- no need to rush_, she thought dreading but anticipating the inevitable meeting between the two of them. She wanted to see him and confront him, but the woman in her wanted him to see her new look. See if she could get a reaction out of him other than the stoic stare or smirk that's usually plastered on his face. Other than that, she realized she didn't really have any plans for the day.

_Well, there's always the list, _she thought drolly and smiled. She could take a look at it and see if there were any of the items she could scratch off the list today. Or maybe even do something impulsive. Who knew? But if she planned to do something impulsive or spontaneous, would it still be spontaneous? She let out a soft chuckle and shook her head at such a trivial thought. The prospects were boundless at this point because other than making sure Taylor was fed and off to school, she had no real plans or responsibilities for the day.

Taylor walked into the kitchen following the familiar smell of pancakes and scrambled eggs cooking on the griddle and bacon frying in the skillet. "Good morning, mom. It smells good in here."

"I cooked your favorite; it'll be ready in a minute. Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, I slept fine. You must have slept pretty well, too. You're in a really good mood this morning. You're making pancakes…on a Monday. You hate Mondays."

Joss smiled as she stacked the pancakes on his plate and sprinkled them with powdered sugar. "I guess I woke up on the right side of the bed this morning." She added the eggs and bacon to his plate and grabbed a fork out of the drawer holding the flatware as he took a seat at the kitchen table.

"Well, whatever it is, I'm just glad you're feeling better. Are you back? Like, whatever it was that was bothering you...is it over? Are you back to being just mom?" he looked at her with a hopeful expression and Joss felt heartbroken. Her mom and Fusco were right. She hadn't been herself lately and although she tried to conceal it, Taylor had noticed and it affected him more than she knew. She placed the plate of pancakes on the table in front of him and kissed him on the temple of his forehead.

Looking him in the eye, she said, "I never went anywhere, but if you feel like I wasn't here with you, I'm sorry. So, to answer your question, yes I'm back, sweetheart." He looked at her with a smile and she could see the relief in his eyes. They gave each other their signature fist bump and she knew everything was going to be okay. "Do you want maple or chocolate syrup for your pancakes?"

"Chocolate," he replied with a mouth full of scrambled eggs. She smiled as she grabbed the syrup from the fridge. _Today is gonna be a good day_, she thought. _A very good day_.

* * *

John turned the faucet to stop the running water in the shower. _Today is gonna be a bad day_, he thought. _A very bad day._ He stepped out of the shower, grabbed the towel from the wall rack, rubbed the towel through his hair to dry it, and wrapped it around his waist. He looked in the mirror and saw the stubble on his face, but he wouldn't have time to shave. He was running late. If he hadn't spent the night with Zoe at her apartment, he would already be leaving his favorite bakery with his daily box sweet treats and making his way to the library by now. Muttering curses to himself he went to his walk-in closet to pick out one of the many black suits he owned and a crisp white shirt; his uniform of sorts.

As he put on his clothes, he wondered what made him go to see Zoe last night. He didn't have to answer her phone call. They hadn't seen or spoken to each other since that night at the Coronet Hotel where they spent the night in the penthouse suite. But last night, he needed a distraction and while Zoe proved to be a viable diversion from the thoughts weighing down on him, he still couldn't get _her_ off his mind. Just like he was thinking about _her_ now.

_Joss_. She had been gone for a week, but now she was back. Last night he wanted to talk to her, find out what was going on, and shake her for disappearing on him and making him worry, but he didn't. Zoe's call was a cop out for him and a reason to leave before he crossed the street, walked up the stairs to her stoop, and knocked on Joss' door. He questioned if he even would have done that if Zoe hadn't called, because he wasn't really ready to approach Joss yet. And he wasn't really sure if Joss wanted to see him at all. He didn't know where she had been other than 'down south' visiting relatives. He managed to contact her once on the burner phone that she used to contact Fusco, but that conversation didn't go over so well. Once she knew he had her number she ignored his calls and even turned her phone off so that anytime he called her it went to voice mail.

John gave himself a mental shake to rid himself of the bitterness of those memories and went to the small arsenal in his closet. He grabbed his SIG Sauer and placed it in the small of his back. Walking to the door, he grabbed his keys, cell phone, and earwig from the side table and walked out the door. He rushed to the bakery and then made his way to the library in record time, but still arrived later than usual.

"Another yoga class today, Mr. Reese?" Finch asked as he taped the third picture to the glass window.

"There was a line at the bakery. Apparently it's National Doughnut Day," John lied as he placed the box of doughnuts on the desk next to Finch's computer along with his daily cup of Sencha green tea.

"Maybe you should lay off the doughnuts for a while, John. You're getting a little bit of a pouch there around your middle. You know they say it's harder to get rid of it as you get older," Shaw snarked as she walked into the room.

"Shaw….always great to see you," John replied sardonically with a smile that didn't meet his eyes. He was already in a foul mood as it was. "What brings you here?"

"Retirement is getting a bit boring so I came to visit Bear."

"Actually, Mr. Reese I called Ms. Shaw here because her assistance is needed today," Finch replied. "We had three new numbers come in late last night."

"Any of them related?" Reese asked as he took a sip of his coffee and looked at the three different pictures taped on the glass.

"Based on their backgrounds, no. These appear to be three separate cases that need our attention. Which is why I called Ms. Shaw."

"Who are they?" John asked.

Finch walked over to the window and pointed to the first picture of an older, bald white male with wire rimmed glasses and a thick mustache on the far left. "The first number is William Hartwell. Age 53, born September 7, 1959. Currently lives in Westchester, New York and teaches chemistry at a local high school where his son Timothy also attends as a student. Mr. Hartwell studied at Caltech where he became a brilliant chemist who specialized in crystallography, or 'gray matter'. In 1985, his groundbreaking research contributed to a project he worked on with Elliott Walters regarding photon radiology that was awarded the Nobel Prize.

"Soon after, he and Mr. Walters co-founded a company called Gray Matter Technologies. For reasons unknown, he sold his share of the company to Walters for $5,000.00. About a year ago, Hartwell was diagnosed with stage-3 lung cancer. I am not sure what the threat could be against him, but I have already filled the opening available for a substitute of the computer science class. The regular teacher, Ms. Hall is out on maternity leave and they have had a bit of trouble filling the slot. I should be leaving soon, before I am late for my first class."

Shaw walked to the glass and pointed to the second picture. "So who's cold glass of water on a hot summer's day in the second picture?"

While Finch managed to suppress the urge to roll his eyes, John openly did so. "The second number is Ethan Bradley. Age 43, born August 4, 1969. Currently resides in Manhattan, New York, but was born in Savannah, Georgia and raised in Atlanta. He attended the University of Georgia on a baseball scholarship and earned his Bachelor of Science degree in business administration graduating magna cum laude. He went on to further his education at Harvard Business School where he obtained his MBA. Bradley then entered the management consulting industry and as a young star in that industry he was able to obtain the position of chief executive officer of Mortimer and Company helping to lead the company out of a financial crisis. About five years later, he left Mortimer and Company and cofounded Bradley Capital with former Harvard classmate and current business partner Gabriel Lambros, age 41."

Finch taped a picture of Lambros on the glass under Bradley's picture and Shaw became even more interested. "Ooh, is he a number too? Please say he is, because I _definitely_ have these two covered. Wait. They're not gay are they? It's always the good looking ones that call themselves _partners _that end up being gay." She looked at John and then to Finch. "No offense."

Finch gave Shaw a curious look, not really knowing or wanting to know what she meant by that and continued. "Bradley Capital is a highly profitable private equity investment firm and is one of the largest of its kind in the country. Mr. Bradley has an estimated net worth of $500 to $750 million dollars though I'm sure that estimate is quite low considering the money he may be holding in overseas accounts."

"So what do I need to do?" Shaw asked Finch, ready to get started.

"His personal assistant, Paula Adams, needs an aide to handle administrative and other miscellaneous obligations that she can no longer handle given the amount of responsibility she has taking care of Mr. Bradley's various and sometimes eccentric needs. She tends to go through assistants rather habitually as she is known to be a very, shall we say _demanding_ individual. I have assigned you to the temporary position through my employment agency and you start today. You may want to get moving seeing as how you're due to arrive in the next 45 minutes."

"I'm on it," she said on her way out of the library, not looking back.

John frowned at the picture of Ethan Bradley. He was glad that Shaw had so enthusiastically volunteered to take on Bradley as a number. He was tired of having to rescue wealthy, pretentious assholes who thought the world owed them something because they made a lot of money. He looked over to the final and third picture. It was a picture of a biracial teenage girl with auburn curls and hazel eyes who looked to be no older than 16 years old.

"Finch, who's our third number?"

"Chloe Richards. Age 16, born April 12, 1997. Currently a runaway, but her last known place of residence was in Brooklyn where she lived with her mother and stepfather. She was reported as a runaway two months ago. Whereabouts are currently unknown, but her number has come up so at least we know she isn't dead and is likely to be in the greater NYC area."

"I'll contact Carter to see what she can pull from Chloe's case file," he replied with a feeling of dread and anticipation. He was dreading the phone call wondering if she would ignore his call again, but was also anxious to speak with her and hear her voice. This time the conversation would happen under less contentious circumstances and although it was work related, he'd hope it would be a way to break the silence between them.

"Yes, of course. As I understand, Detective Carter and Taylor returned yesterday evening. Keep me posted on what you find out and call me if you need anything. I'll be in Westchester," he said as he picked up his suit jacket and limped towards the stairs that led to the library's exit. He abruptly paused, and turned to John, "Oh, and Mr. Reese?"

"Yeah, Finch?"

"Could you call Fusco or Leon to see if they can keep an eye on Bear? I don't know how long either of us will be out today."

"Yeah, I'll handle it."

"Thank you." He awkwardly turned around and went down the stairs and John heard the bang of the door closing behind him.

* * *

_(12 days ago)_

John sat in the library as Finch typed information in the computer. After the eventful day that led into last night, he craved normalcy. The machine hadn't put out another number since the impromptu save of the bride and groom in Manhattan yesterday afternoon. Since the machine had moved itself and its location was unknown, they had no idea if they would get another number or not. He sighed as he tossed a tennis ball across the room for Bear to fetch.

Finch looked up from the computer and eyed his friend in exasperation. "Perhaps, your time would be better spent taking Bear for a walk, Mr. Reese."

"Why don't you join us, Finch? It doesn't look like you pecking away at the keyboard is doing much of anything."

Finch frowned, but got up from his seat anyway. He figured it would be best if all three of them got some fresh air and he also wanted to clear the air between him and John and apologize. "Very well. I'll get my coat."

Finch and John left the library with Bear and walked a few blocks in the direction of a park close by. There was an uncomfortable silence between the two men, and Reese decided to break the silence.

"Finch, you think we'll ever get another number." Even though John was tired from the events of the past two days, he knew that he didn't want to have another lull in between numbers. That is, if they ever got anymore numbers. They continued to walk through the park, slowly as to not tire out Finch too soon. He especially seemed to be in pain today, though he would never admit it.

"I don't know. Mr. Reese, I owe you an explanation. And an apology. Three years ago, when I put the code out there to free the machine, I had no idea what path it would take. Or what unintended consequences it might have." Finch stopped walking and turned to face John and continued. "I never intended to hurt anyone. But I accepted that someone might get hurt. I always worried that events that I had set in motion may have…changed things for you."

"My life changed. When I kept my mouth shut at an airport terminal seven years ago. You didn't have anything to do with that. You lost a friend. You did what you had to do." Finch was one of the few true friends John had, and his actions prior to them working together and becoming wouldn't change that. Finch saved his life. Everything happens for a reason, and if it weren't for Finch, he'd still be a homeless drunk trying to kill himself.

John looked away and noticed a pair of pay phones nearby. Finch followed John's line of sight and noticed them as well. They began to walk again and slowly made their way down a small set of concrete stairs. "Since the numbers have stopped, you shouldn't go on paying me as generous as you are."

Finch stopped and turned again to face John. "Since you give away ninety percent of what I pay you, I don't see why I shouldn't continue." The pay phone rang as they both looked at it, wondering if this was just a fluke or the machine trying to contact them. Finch slowly limped to the phone to find out.

What he heard on the other end was very familiar as the automated voice rattled off numbers, letters from the phonetic alphabet table, and author's names. He gave a small smile as he hung up the phone and looked at John.

"Mr. Reese, it looks like we have a new number."

John smiled at Finch. "Well, let's head back to the library and get to work."

When they returned to the library, Finch discovered that their new number wasn't new at all, but a reprise of a former number. Finch frowned as he printed out the picture of the number and taped it to the window. "Carl Elias," he said, not adding anything else because nothing else needed to be said. Finch knew that John would not take this news well, and could see the worry in his eyes though his face remained neutral and apathetic.

Feelings of dread washed over John as he attempted to grasp the implications in this turn of events. He took the phone out of his pocket and called Joss immediately. When she didn't answer and the call went to her voice mail, he used all of his CIA training to remain calm and not panic. He checked the app on his phone and per the GPS tracker on her phone it showed that she was home. He breathed a sigh of relief, but wasn't quite satisfied yet. He knew today was her day off. He would go by her apartment just to check on her and make sure she was okay. He planned to do that anyway. When he spoke to her yesterday she didn't sound too good. He walked towards the stairs and before he could leave, Finch called out.

"Mr. Reese. Where are you going?"

John stopped, but didn't turn around. "I have an idea on where Elias might be or who knows where Elias might be. I'll call you if I need anything." He walked down the stairs and Finch heard the sound of the door closing downstairs.

"Oh, dear," he said sighing as he sat back down in his chair in front of the computer. He worried about how things would turn out this time and had a feeling that he and John were about to partake in another wild ride. Sensing the tension in the air and feeling that something was wrong, Bear whimpered and shuffled over to Finch to lay his head on his leg. Finch absently scratched Bear behind the ears as he blankly stared at the computer screen.

* * *

"So what are we going to do, Detective? What's the end game here?" Elias asked as he opened the newspaper that had been sitting on the nightstand.

"Listen pal, just stay put. John is gonna be here any minute and we'll be able to get you in a safe house. After things blow over you're going right back to Rikers."

"What makes you think you'll be able to keep me for that long? You can't watch over me 24/7 and you told your partner to take off. Which was very noble and very loyal of you, but not a very smart move. Clearly Detective Carter is the brains _and_ brawn of your duo."

Fusco shot him a glare. "Shut it."

Elias smiled and lifted the newspaper to read it. Fusco turned on the small television to see if word of Elias' escape had hit the local news. Moments later there was a knock on the door. _Finally_, Fusco thought as he got up from the uncomfortable plastic chair and walked to the door. He looked out of the peephole to see John with murder in his eyes. _Shit! Looks like this situation is gonna go from a clusterfuck to a Category 5 shit storm_. Fusco opened the door to let John in.

John walked into the small motel room and quickly assessed the situation. He saw Elias sitting on the bed with his back against the headboard with his legs stretched out reading a newspaper. He saw the containers of last night's takeout piled high in the small wastebasket. He noticed the bright orange prison uniform was neatly folded at the end of the bed and that Elias had changed into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.

John noticed the television playing the local news and saw the bags under Fusco's eyes and the worry lines across his forehead. He also noticed that the one person he was looking for and was most concerned about was not present. Elias put the newspaper down on his lap and smiled at John.

"Hello, John. It's good to see you again. I was starting to worry that I would be stuck with this man." He turned to look at Fusco. "No offense, but you're not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer. But as I said before you're loyal. You're loyal to your partner and I respect that. I'm partly indebted to you but more so to her. She did save my life."

John didn't acknowledge Elias' greeting. He saw there was no immediate threat, but he knew they needed to move Elias as soon as possible. However, his biggest priority was locating Joss. She was absent and he didn't see a sign of her anywhere in the small room, and that troubled him even more. Before he received the call from Fusco, he went to Carter's apartment only to discover that she was gone. Her cell phone and Taylor's cell phone were on the side table next to her door. He didn't have a way to contact her and he found himself feeling sick with worry. He turned to Fusco and asked, "Lionel, where's Carter?"


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_(12 days ago)_

"Lionel, where's Carter?"

Elias felt affronted. It had been a while since he and John last saw each other and he didn't take too kindly to being ignored. Before Fusco could answer, Elias spoke again. "Detective Fusco here talked her into leaving." John still didn't look at him, choosing to coldly stare at Fusco instead.

Elias went for what he knew to be John's soft spot and continued. "I'm quite surprised that she did, considering she's a former soldier. Who knew she would abandon a mission?" With that statement Elias received glares from both men. Not that he cared much about offending the corpulent detective, but he wanted John's attention focused on him.

John's face remained neutral but Elias could see that anger in his eyes. He noticed the slight clench of his jaw and how John balled his hands into fists before releasing them again. Elias smiled. Yes, he had definitely hit a nerve.

"Hey screw you, Elias. I won't stand here and let you disrespect my partner. Especially after she saved your sorry ass," Fusco retorted, getting red with anger.

"I suppose you're right Detective Fusco. My apologies," Elias said more to John than to Fusco.

John had no use for the back and forth between Fusco and Elias. He ignored Elias once again and turned to speak directly to Fusco. In a very low tone he asked, "Where is she?"

"Hopefully she skipped town and decided to lay low for a while. Based on her actions last night during my rescue, I think that it would be best for her own safety," Elias answered again. He knew that John had a soft spot for Detective Carter, but he decided to push John to get an idea of how much of it had to do with some noble sense of respect for her as a good cop or how much of it was because of something on a deeper and more personal level.

John wanted to put his hand around Elias' neck and squeeze until he could no longer breathe, but remained rooted in place. He knew what Elias was trying to do, and right now he needed to know as much as he could so that he could track down Joss. He finally decided to address him. "What happened last night?"

"Detective Carter saved my life. Which begs the question: where were you? The way she came in to save the day reminded me so much of you." Elias smiled fondly at the parallels between the two of them.

"Granted, I wasn't able to see much because my head was covered, but I remember hearing gun shots and I heard that lowlife Terney beg for his life. So imagine my surprise when I discovered that my savior was Carter. She's a tough lady to come into a situation like that, guns blazing, all alone. I really underestimated her. Frankly, I have to say I admire her."

John did not like the picture Elias' words were painting. He hated that she decided to put herself in such a dangerous situation without any backup. He hated that he couldn't be there for her. Now she was gone and he didn't know where she was or how to contact her.

"Where is she now?"

This time Fusco answered without interruption. "She left to go visit her relatives down south. Taylor's out for spring break so she'll be back in a week."

"That makes no sense, Lionel. She saves Elias and then leaves him here with you to go on a vacation? That's not like her." John wondered what Fusco wasn't telling him. None of this smelled right and he felt a tidal wave of anger and frustration wash over him. He took deep slow breaths to remain calm, his face still expressionless.

"Listen, just take it easy. She's fine and we can talk about it later but right now we need to get him out of here," Fusco said as his attention was drawn to the television behind John. Elias' mug shot was on the screen while the anchorman read the news.

_Mobster Carl Elias escaped late last night during a prison transfer, wounding an officer. The chief of police released a statement asking the citizens of New York to call their hotline if you know of his whereabouts. Do not, we repeat, do not engage with this man as he is considered to be armed and dangerous._

Elias picked up the remote and turned off the television in disgust. "They make me sound like a monster."

John turned to look at Elias. "You are a monster."

"Hmm. Curious to hear you say that, John. So what does that make you?"

John didn't respond as he lifted his right hand to tap his earpiece. "Finch, did you get that?"

"Yes, Mr. Reese and unfortunately Detective Fusco is right. You need to leave immediately. I've been listening to the feed of the hotline and the police just received a tip to your current location. I've texted you the address of the nearest safe house," Finch said with urgency in his voice.

"Get your things, Elias. We're leaving," John said walking to the window to look outside. There weren't any cops outside yet, but that didn't mean they weren't already en route.

"There's nothing I need here. We can leave now."

John looked at the bright orange prison uniform neatly folded on the foot of the bed. He walked over to pick it up and tossed it to Elias. "You'll need this. You're going back to Rikers, Elias."

Elias looked down at the uniform that landed on his lap and back up at John. He gave another smile but this time it didn't meet his eyes. "We'll see about that, John."

* * *

Joss woke abruptly at the feel of the car coming to a stop. She was surprised she was able to even fall asleep because at the start if the road trip she wasn't able to rest. She was so on edge. It was so bad she volunteered to drive the first leg of the trip. Her mother didn't think it was a good idea, but Joss insisted. She needed to be able to focus on something else other than the problems she was walking- better yet, running away from. She was making herself sick with worry and doubted that Fusco would be able to handle Elias on his own.

They made a pit stop at a rest area in Virginia and she called Fusco on the burner phone. He told her that he was able to contact John and Finch and that John was on his way over and they would be moving Elias soon. Joss was relieved to hear that Fusco would have backup but she knew they would not be out of the woods yet. She also knew that there would be a lot of questions about her absence. She thought it would be best to get Taylor and her mom to their destination and then go back to New York to help. When she suggested this to Fusco he insisted that she stay away.

"Carter, stay put damn it. You said you trusted me to handle it, so let me. Do NOT come back up here until things blow over. The fact that you're out of town visiting family is your cover. Don't be stupid," he said. She could hear his irritation over the phone and knew it wasn't just the situation she put them in. She figured Elias was needling Fusco's nerves as well. She only got a small dose of it while driving him to the motel, but Fusco had been stuck with him for over half a day now.

Joss once again asked Fusco to keep her updated and he told her that if she kept hounding him, he would have John keep her posted until she returned. That was the last thing she wanted and she told Fusco that she did not want John or Finch to contact her. "I didn't bring my regular cell phone. Just the burner phone. Only you should contact me on this phone, Fusco. I will explain myself to John and Finch when I return. Just tell them I went down south to visit relatives."

"Why don't you want them to contact you? Is this about Stills? Listen, I know your upset, but-"

"Fusco," she cut him off. "You told me to leave. You told me you would let me know what's going on. If I don't hear from you, I'm going to call you. Only you. I will talk to John and Finch when I'm ready." He let it go and they talked a bit more before wrapping up their conversation. He told her that he would call her in a couple days after things settled down and they ended the call.

Joss rubbed her tired eyes as she looked out the passenger side window and saw that they were traveling through a very familiar part of town waiting for the light to change. They were about 15 minutes away from her grandmother's house and she couldn't help but smile at all the happy memories that came to mind. Like all of the summers from her childhood or all the times she and her late husband Michael brought Taylor when he was just a small boy; even the last time she and Taylor visited over three years ago.

They were passing small shops and a few new stores and gas stations that had been built since her last visit. It was still light out, but the sun had begun to set turning the sky a mix of orange and pink hues. Vicky turned off the A/C and let the windows down so they could get some fresh air. The wind was cool against Joss' face and it felt good. It felt like she was coming home.

After a few small winding roads, they pulled up in the gravel driveway to a small red brick cottage with white shutters. There were large bushes with pink, blue, and white hydrangea in full bloom signaling that spring had definitely arrived. The white rocking chairs on the porch reminded her of the late summer evenings when she and her cousins would try to catch fireflies or 'lightning bugs' as her southern cousins called them, out front as her grandparents sat on those rocking chairs and watched. As she got out of the car, she heard the waves of the ocean crashing coming from behind the house and felt herself begin to relax already. A heavyset older woman with salt and pepper hair and smooth walnut toned skin that hid her true age walked out the front door to welcome her visitors.

"Is that my oldest grand-baby and favorite daughter-in-law with my sweet great-grandson?" she asked as she walked over to the car, her floral house dress fluttering in the cool spring breeze.

Joss couldn't keep the smile off her face. She was so happy to see her grandmother. It had been too long since they last saw each other in person and Joss made a promise to herself to change that. "Hey grandma," she said as she walked over to meet her halfway, her arms already outstretched for a warm embrace.

"Hey baby," she replied, finally meeting Joss and hugged her tight while rubbing her hand up and down Joss' back. Pulling back to look at Joss she said, "My goodness Jocelyn, you are a bag of bones. What they feedin' you up there in New York? Baby, you need to eat. It's a good thing I cooked."

Taylor, being the growing teenage boy that he is, automatically got excited at the prospect of food. He walked over to his great-grandmother and gave her a huge bear hug. "Great-grams what did you make? I'm starving. We haven't eaten anything since noon."

Joss shot him a warning look and so did Vicky. "Taylor, I swear you act like you're going to starve to death if you don't eat in three hour intervals! Go get our bags out of the trunk and bring them in the house," Vicky fussed.

Taylor reluctantly left his great-grandmother's embrace, but not before she quickly whispered in his ear. "Don't you worry about a thing. I made the lemon pound cake you like so much and it's all yours." He walked to the car to get their luggage with the biggest grin on his face.

Vicky was the last to get her hug, but didn't mind one bit. It had been almost ten years since she last paid a visit and had been hard for her to come down to see Howard's family after he passed away. "Good to see you, Helen. It's been a long time," she said as they held their embrace.

"Good to see you too, Vicky. It's been too long. I feel like I lost you too when I lost my baby boy, Howie. You make sure you don't stay a stranger anymore, you hear me?"

Vicky released Helen and smiled, quickly wiping the tears from her eyes as she tried to compose herself. "I hear you," she said softly.

"Well, let's get on inside. I made fried pork chops, red rice, pinto beans, cabbage, and hot water cornbread for dinner so y'all better be ready to eat," Helen said as she led the trio to her house.

Joss' mouth watered and she couldn't wait to eat and catch up on everything going on with the family. She followed her grandmother inside the house and decided to set aside her worries... at least for a few hours.

* * *

_(2 days ago)_

Shaw walked into the building where the New York branch of Bradley Capital was located. It was an impressive building in a prime location of the business district of lower Manhattan near Wall Street. She shuffled along with the crowd of workers and squeezed into an already crowded elevator and pressed the number to her floor.

Once she reached her floor, she stepped out of the elevator and was amazed at how sleek and expensive the space looked. Calming blues were painted on the walls while the white leather chairs and glass and chrome tables provided a stark contrast in the waiting and reception area. Behind the long, oval shaped receptionist's desk were floor to ceiling windows providing an amazing view of the Hudson River and the Brooklyn Bridge.

Shaw walked to the young brunette woman sitting behind the desk. "Hello, my name is Regina Sanderson. I'm here to start the assistant position for Paula Adams."

The receptionist keyed a few stokes in her computer and gave Shaw a temporary badge. "Good morning, Ms. Sanderson. Welcome to Bradley Capital. Please go through the glass double doors to your left and walk to the very end of the hall. You'll find Ms. Adams there."

"Thank you." Shaw opened the glass door and walked inside. She checked the time on her watch and it showed that she was seven minutes early. _At least I won't be starting off on the wrong foot_ she thought as she made her way to the large corner office down the hall.

Shaw opened another pair of glass doors to a smaller reception area with two desks sitting on opposite ends of the room across from each other. She saw a small waiting area with a couch and coffee table and a flat screen television mounted on the wall with CNBC playing on mute. She noticed a dark wooden door next to one of the desks and she assumed that was the door to Ethan Bradley's office. Once she knew the ins and outs of this place, she would be able to get into his office and plant cameras and bugs inside for additional surveillance. She'd been to many different places on many different undercover missions before, but this place seemed pretty tame compared to that. She didn't see anyone in the room and wondered if she was in the wrong office. The receptionist said she would find Paula Adams here but she saw no one.

"You're late," were the words Shaw heard from behind her. The icy tone in which it was said gave her pause. Shaw turned around to see a tall, slender woman with long, sleek, bone straight light blonde hair and expressionless brown eyes. She looked as if she were a model that stepped out of a "Working Women of New York" article of Elle magazine. Her makeup was impeccable, her jacket was tailored, the pencil skirt fit close to her body, and her black leather Louboutin pumps gleamed in the harsh fluorescent light.

Shaw supplied a fake smile to the woman. "My apologies Ms. Adams, the temp agency informed me to be here by 8am. What is the best time to arrive?" She asked, hoping to diffuse the situation before her cover was blown and she lost the fake job.

"The best time to arrive is early, Ms. Sanderson. Not just barely on time."

"Please, call me Regina."

Paula gave Shaw a tight smile. "Ms. Sanderson, we are in a place of business and neither of us are that close or familiar with each other. I will address you as Ms. Sanderson and you will address me as Ms. Adams. Are we clear?"

Not giving Shaw a chance to respond, Paula continued. "Okay, let's get started. Mr. Bradley will have a busy week because a lot of meetings were delayed and pushed back due to his absence last week."

"His absence? Where was he?" Shaw asked, wondering if it had to do with why his number came up.

Paula glared at Shaw as if she was appalled that she would dare to ask such a question or speak out of turn. "Mr. Bradley had his schedule cleared all day on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday while out of town on business visiting our Atlanta branch. Are there any more questions?" she asked briskly.

Shaw thought of all the different ways she could kill Paula but remained calm, kept her facial expression neutral, and replied, "No, not at the moment."

"Good." Paula walked to the desk facing the door across the room as Shaw followed her scowling as her back was turned. "This is your desk. I've already compiled a checklist of duties I need done by the end of the day." She picked up the list from the desk and gave it to Shaw.

Shaw read through the tasks; while they were pretty basic, there was a lot to do. After looking at Shaw expectantly for a moment she asked, "Well, are you going to just stand there or are you going to get started?"

Giving Paula another phony smile, she replied, "I'll get started right away."

Paula gave a tight smile that looked more like a grimace and walked away to take a seat at her desk to answer the ringing phone. Shaw really hoped she didn't have to shoot this woman. While Finch was a gentleman in describing the woman as demanding, Shaw figured that she would have no trouble describing Paula Adams as an overbearing, frigid bitch.

* * *

Finch left the main office of the school with his temporary badge and paperwork in his hands. The office aide gave him a copy of a map of the school and told him how to find the computer lab, but he still found himself getting lost in the hallways trying to find room 325. With every corner he turned, it seemed as if the classrooms were all even numbered. Just as he turned around to go back the way he came, he ran into William Hartwell.

"You lost?" he asked, eying Finch suspiciously from behind his wire rimmed glasses.

"Yes, unfortunately I am. I'm looking for the computer lab in room 325," Finch replied. He wasn't at all fazed by Hartwell's apprehension of him. Finch had been in enough scenarios playing the role of someone else that it felt almost like second nature to him. He was actually happy that he didn't have to go out of his way to try to meet this number. The opportunity fell in his lap.

"So you're the new substitute for this week," Hartwell said with a grin. It was more of a statement rather than a question.

"Yes, I am. I've been told that the position has been hard to fill."

Hartwell chuckled, "That's an understatement. Come on, I'll show you the way." He walked forward heading in the direction that Finch was originally taking before he stopped to turn back. Hartwell took note of Finch's limp and slowed his stride so that Finch could follow at a comfortable pace. "You have to go to other 'wing' of the building to get to the odd numbered classrooms. It's really stupid, but that's the layout of this place. What's your name?"

"Harold Lark. And you are?"

"William Hartwell. I teach chemistry here."

"Well, I'm glad to have run into you, Mr. Hartwell. I'm afraid I would still be wandering the halls if I hadn't."

Hartwell gave a polite smile and didn't say anything else as they walked to the other side of the school. After a few minutes of walking the empty halls in silence, they finally arrived to room 325. Although the door was closed, Finch could hear the raucousness of the students waiting in the classroom.

"Well, this is it. This is the computer lab. My classroom is right around the corner. The students can be a bit rambunctious but they're generally good kids. The thing that's bad about the lab is-" Hartwell was cut off by the ringing of his cell phone. "Hey, listen. I gotta take this. Good luck, Mr. Lark." He walked away and turned the corner to answer his phone and Finch was able to conspicuously force pair his cell with Hartwell's to listen in on the call.

_"Yeah, what is it?"_

_"What is it? Are you outta your fucking mind? I've been trying to contact you since last night man! Where the hell were you? You were supposed to meet me and bring what they asked for. What the fuck, Bill? These guys aren't playing around!"_

_"Take it easy! I can't really talk right now because I'm at the school. You knew I didn't have all the supplies I needed. I was able to find it last night and I'll be able to bring what they want tonight."_

_"Dammit you better have it ready, Bill! They sent in reinforcements and those motherfuckers almost broke my leg! Shit! I need a smoke. I'll call you back. And make sure you answer the goddamn phone next time!"_

Finch stood in the hallway in shock. Mr. Hartwell was obviously involved in something very dangerous and illegal. It was now up to Finch to figure out exactly what that was. He walked into the computer lab and discovered what the bad thing was that Mr. Hartwell was going to tell him about the lab. The computers were ancient. The students' cell phones were of better use than the dinosaurs sitting in front of them. Finch let out a weary sigh. This was going to be a long day, but he was going to have to find a way to get through it. He made a mental note to send a generous donation to the school to revamp their computer lab.

"Good morning, everyone. My name is Mr. Lark."

* * *

Joss walked back to her room to grab her purse so that she could take Taylor to school. Before she walked out of her room, she saw her bucket list on the nightstand in the corner of her eye. Now that it had caught her attention, she stopped for a moment to look it over. _Hmm, what can I do today?_ She smiled as she read further down the list and came across the one she liked:

_**14) Say yes to everything for a day**_

_Yeah, I think I'll do this one today. How bad can it be? It might even be fun._

"Hey, mom! You ready to go?" Taylor called out from the living room bringing Joss out of her musings.

"Yes, Taylor. No need to shout in the house," she replied as she walked into the living room with her purse hanging on her shoulder. She grabbed the keys from the side table near the door and tossed both phones into her purse.

"You're wearing that?" Taylor asked making a face.

"Yeah. What's wrong with what I have on?"

"Nothing, it's just that you had all those fancy new clothes and shoes and I thought you'd wear one of your new outfits today."

Joss smiled. "Well, I'm only giving you a ride. I didn't think I needed to wear designer duds to drop you off at school. Especially on my day off," she ended with a raised eyebrow.

"No, nothing like that. I just hope you don't plan on wearing those old beat up jeans all day."

"There's nothing wrong with my jeans," she said as she opened the door following Taylor out of the apartment.

"Yeah, sure mom. If you say so," he replied no longer paying attention to her as he was now busy texting or tweeting or facebooking or whatever it was that teens did on their cell phones. He'd been glued to the thing since they returned yesterday evening.

Joss drove Taylor to school in a comfortable silence. Well it was silent because he was still engrossed with his cell. As she stopped the car in front of his school, he finally looked up from his phone and spoke again.

"Mom, can I stay over Kevin's house tonight? He just texted me that he has the latest God of War game. I know it's a school night but we were away all last week and..."

"Yes, Taylor." She almost laughed at the look of surprise on his face.

"Huh?" He looked on in shock and confusion.

"I said yes. Make sure it's okay with his parents first, but realize that if you two stay up all night playing video games, you'll have to suffer for it the next day. Not me."

"So you're saying it's okay?"

"_Yes._ Now go to class before I change my mind."

Taylor was elated. "Aw, man thanks mom! You're awesome! Can I also go to a party on Friday?" He was grinning from ear to ear and wondered if he could get her to agree to anything else while she was still in a good mood.

"Don't push your luck, Taylor."

"Well… at least that wasn't a no. Will you at least think about it?"

Now that was something she was more comfortable saying yes to. "Yeah, I'll give it some thought."

He moved over to kiss her on the cheek. "Thanks mom. You're the best. See ya later!" He rushed out of the car and walked into the school. Joss smiled and shook her head as she watched him stride into the school with a bit of swagger in his step. Although her baby boy was growing up, he still had a playful and youthful side to him.

As she drove back home, she heard her cell phone ring. Looking briefly at the caller ID she saw the familiar unknown number. _If I answer the phone, I guess that's sorta like saying yes._ She took a deep breath and released it as she answered the phone on speaker.

"Carter." She didn't hear anything on the other end. "Hello?"

"I'm surprised you answered, Detective."

She had to admit she's always liked the way John called her '_Detective_'. He would say it so smoothly and in a low tone that would sometimes make her blush. She didn't even try to hide the smile on her face, in spite of their unresolved issues. It's not like he could see her. She was in a good mood today and she _did_ decide to say yes to everything for today. She wondered what he wanted; hoping for the best but bracing herself for the worst.

"What do you need, John?"

* * *

_(8 days ago)_

Several days had passed by and Joss felt herself going through the motions. During the times she spent with Taylor and her family she was happy, relaxed. She got a chance to spend some much needed quality time with Taylor. They went bike riding, played a game of bocce on the beach, and even did a bit of shopping at the outlets. But Taylor soon found friends that were his own age and she was left alone to get lost in her thoughts, like today.

Today, Taylor was hanging out with his new friends. Not having anything to do, Joss went to help her grandmother and mother in the kitchen while they prepared the food for this evening's fish fry and seafood boil. She must not have been much help because her mother kicked her out. "Go take some time to clear your head. You're zoning out on me again and you're not about to burn down Helen's kitchen on my watch," Vicky scolded.

So she grabbed a beach chair, walked out the back door, and took the path through the high grass to get to the beach. After finding a spot to settle in, she checked her burner phone once again. Still nothing from Fusco. Her anxiety seemed to increase as the days went by without word from him. No news is usually good news, but in this case she didn't want to be left in the dark. She called his phone again, but just like yesterday, he didn't answer. She let out a huff of frustration and stared out at the ocean.

She wondered how things led up to this point in her life. She thought about everything that has happened over the past two years and how the choices she made led her here. Things used to be so simple, so black and white. Now everything was shrouded in shades of gray.

She went from being a good cop that followed the letter of the law to a good cop helping a vigilante save lives. Soon after, she became a not so good cop obstructing an FBI investigation by destroying evidence and drugging a man for his DNA. But it didn't stop there. It should have stopped there but it didn't. The lines were no longer blurred. She completely crossed the line and lost herself in the process.

She became an accessory to murder to help her partner by digging up and moving a corpse. And now it seemed her transformation was complete by becoming a vigilante of her own by saving Elias. _Where do I go from here? Who am I now? _She sighed as she watched the waves roll in and didn't seem to notice her surroundings while sinking deeper into her thoughts.

Her grandmother seemed to have invited all the family that was in Charleston and Joss knew that there was going to be family coming from other cities a couple hours away. Like her cousins Jennifer and Jacqueline who were settling in next to her with their own beach chairs and coolers, without her noticing.

Joss was suddenly brought back to the present from the thoughts of the past. "Hello? Earth to Joss! Are you with us?" Jacqueline teased.

Joss looked up to see two smiling faces looking back at her. She stood up to greet them with a huge smile of her own. "Oh my god! Jenny! Jackie! Hey!" The three women squealed like young girls as they embraced each other in a group hug.

Jocelyn, Jennifer, and Jacqueline. The three Js. When they were growing up as kids, they were inseparable from each other during the summer. Joss was the oldest, beating Jacqueline by six months. Jennifer was the youngest of the trio, being a year behind Jacqueline. Not only did they share each summer together as children and teenagers, they also spent spring breaks together during their young adult years taking trips to Miami and Cancun. They were the closest thing Joss had to sisters being the only child in her immediate family.

"Aunt Vicky said we'd find you out here. What were you out here thinking about so hard that you didn't even hear us setting up next to you?" Jennifer asked as the ladies sat in their chairs.

"Oh, nothing. I was just daydreaming," Joss lied and quickly changed the subject. "Where are the kids? How many do you have now, like six or seven?" Joss asked playfully.

"Haha," Jennifer replied rolling her eyes. "You know I only have five children."

"Only five? Girl, that's a starting lineup," Jacqueline quipped.

"Shut up Jackie," Jennifer retorted with a smirk. "The kids are in grandma's house changing into their bathing suits. They should be out here soon. Melody will be especially happy to see you. She clings to you worse than Janice ever did, _Jossy-bear_," Jennifer teased. Melody was her youngest child and was very attached to Joss.

Joss laughed. "Aww, I miss my baby Melody. She's such a sweetheart. And how is Janice doing? I haven't spoken to her in a while."

"Janice is fine and getting on my nerves as always, especially with planning this wedding. You know she's engaged, right?"

"Engaged? To who?" Joss asked.

"To Gabe. Gabriel Lambros." Joss looked at her in confusion so Jennifer continued. "You know, Joss. That cute Greek guy she met on New Year's Eve when all of us came up to visit you and decided to stand in Times Square all night because of her stupid bucket list crap."

"Oh, yeah. I remember now. I didn't know they were still together after all this time. Janice and long-term relationships don't seem to mix. I'm happy to hear she found someone."

"Well, what about you Joss? You dating anyone?" Jacqueline asked as she took a plastic pitcher out of the cooler and three glass jars. She added ice to the three jars and filled them with the fruity pink punch from the pitcher with pieces of fruit plopping on top.

"I'm not seeing anyone at the moment. Don't really have time to date these days. And the guy I _was_ dating… well, let's just say that didn't work out."

"Well, Joss, you gotta be willing to put yourself out there again. You can't end up being that old lady who lives in her apartment alone with a bunch of cats. Besides, it shouldn't even be that hard for you to find a guy. We come from a lineage of _fine and sophisticated_ Mitchell women." The women shared a laugh as Jacqueline passed the drinks to Joss and Jennifer and kept the last one for herself.

Joss took a sip of the fruity drink. "Mmm. This is good. What's in it?"

"Oh you know peaches, oranges, cherries, orange juice. Just ordinary things you make punch with," Jacqueline fibbed.

"Yeah, right Jackie. I can taste the alcohol. I just wanna know how to make it. This is good."

Jacqueline and Jennifer gave each other a look. Joss was never a heavy drinker, so she hardly ever asked for any drink recipes. Something was definitely up with her. "Joss, come for a walk with me and let's catch up. I'll even tell you everything that's in this drink," she said rising from her chair and offered a hand to Joss to help her up. "We'll be back in a bit Jenny."

"That's fine," Jennifer replied taking a sip from her glass jar. As she watched Joss and Jackie walk away with their arms linked she heard her phone ring. Digging it out of her bag, she checked the caller ID and answered.

"Hello?"

"Hey Jen."

"Hey, what's up Jan?"

"Nothing much, just calling to check on my big sister. I haven't heard from you in a couple weeks so I thought I'd call. I mean you could be dead or something and I wouldn't even know."

Jennifer loudly sighed. "Girl, please don't get extra dramatic on me. You know how hectic everything has been lately. But the kids are finally on a break so I'm hanging out for a while."

"Hanging out? You don't hang out anymore. Hanging out where?"

"At Granny's house. She didn't call you? Aunt Vicky, Joss, and Taylor are down here visiting for the week."

"What?! Joss is there? And my baby Taylor, too? Even Auntie Vicky? Aunt Vicky hasn't come down to visit since Uncle Howie died."

"Yep. They haven't been down here in years so Grandma is pulling out the red carpet so to speak."

"What do you mean?"

"Everyone is here that can be here and we're having a big seafood boil and fish fry."

Janice's mouth began to water at the thought of all the food she was missing out on. "Dang, I wish someone would have told me. I would _so_ be there right now. I haven't spoken to Joss in months and the last time we all saw each other in person was New Year's Eve a couple years ago. But as always, no one tells me anything."

Jennifer laughed at Janice and could hear her pouting over the phone. "Don't even trip Janice, we know you're busy with the salon and planning the wedding of the century for you and Gabe. How is he by the way?"

"He's fine."

"I know he's fine. Still trying to figure out how you snagged him up."

"You're sounding like a hater right now, Jen it's not a good look."

"Whatever."

"How's Joss doing? Is she nearby? Let me speak to her."

Jennifer looked down the beach to see Joss and Jacqueline holding glass jars of fruity drinks, walking together near the shoreline laughing and kicking water at each other. "No she's not close to me. She's further down the beach drinking Jackie's party punch out of a mason jar. 'Cause according to her it tastes better that way," Jennifer chuckled.

"The fruity one laced with moonshine?" Janice asked with her eyebrow raised.

Jennifer laughed, "Yep! That's the one."

Janice laughed boisterously. "Oh my gosh! You have to- no it is _imperative_ that you take pictures of this!"

Jennifer laughed and said, "Oh, I plan to."

"Well, at least she's having fun and cutting loose. You know she can be a stick in the mud at times. Wish I was there. Do you know how long they're staying?"

"From what I understand, they're staying until the end of the week. Oh, and trust me it looks like it might take a lot of coaxing to get Joss out of her shell today. According to grandma she's been in an unusual mood. Constantly checking her phone. Spacing out. She won't tell anybody what's going on. When I called her on it, she said she was just daydreaming. I think that Jackie thinks it's man trouble but I think it's deeper than that. Just don't know exactly what it is."

Janice gasped, "Oh no, not my Jossy-bear. I'm gonna see if I can make time to get up there before they leave."

"And do what when you get here? The last thing she needs is you meddling around stirring shit up, Janice. You know she can't say no to you. Hey wait.." An idea popped in Jennifer's head as she thought of a plan.

"Hey wait what? I don't always stir up shit. I don't appreciate that Jen!"

"No, I think she needs to see you. But let her come to you."

"What? How am I supposed to get her to come to Atlanta?"

"Just ask her. Duh! She never tells you no. All you have to do is call her Jossy-bear and she folds. I _honestly_ don't get it."

"Joss and I have a bond. She's like the big sister I actually wanted but didn't get."

"Wow. That was a really bitchy thing to say, but I'll let it slide. I think you'll be the kick in the butt she needs to get her out of this funk. From what Grandma tells me she's better than she was when she arrived, but something is still off about her."

"Let me talk to her. I'll ask her now."

"No, not yet. I gotta set this up in a way that's less obvious." She saw Joss and Jacqueline heading back in her direction. "Jan, call me back in like 20 minutes. I think it's time to pull out the big guns this time so we can get our girl back. Can I count on you to do this? Get this right?"

Janice sucked her teeth. "Of course I can Jen. I'm not an idiot. I can practice tact."

"Okay. Gotta run. Bye." Jen disconnected the call moments before Joss and Jackie joined her, taking the two vacant beach chairs next to her.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

_(2 days ago)_

"What do you need, John?" She pulled her car into a parking space close to her apartment and got out of the car. She began walking towards her apartment and waited for John to reply.

John watched her desk from the hidden camera on Fusco's desk. Seeing that she wasn't there yet and hearing the noise in the background, John assumed she was on her way to work. "Are you on your way to the precinct? I need you to pull a file on a teenage runaway named Chloe Richards."

"Actually, I'm headed home. I just dropped Taylor off at school. Why do you need me to pull the file on Chloe Richards? Did your source give you her name? Is she in danger?"

"Yes, our source gave us her name. Whether or not she's in danger is what I'm trying to find out. Why aren't you at work?" _Fusco told me you'd only be gone for a week_, he thought.

Joss audibly sighed, "I'm off for two weeks, John, not one. I'm not setting a foot in that precinct until next Monday. I'll call Fusco and ask him to pull her file for you. In the meantime, you may want to try the shelters. There are crisis shelters throughout the city that provide emergency shelter for homeless teens. I'd start there, to see if you could find her. If that doesn't pan out, I know that the teen runaways tend to hang out at the parks during the day. Especially now that the weather is nicer."

"Thanks, Carter. Can you meet me at our spot with the file, please?"

_Shit! I knew he'd want to meet_, she thought but quickly recovered, choosing to redirect with a question of her own. "Wouldn't it be easier for you to meet Fusco? He has to pull her file anyway."

"Fusco and I aren't exactly on the best of terms right now."

She rolled her eyes and unlocked and opened the door to her apartment. She tossed her keys on the side table and sat her purse down next to the keys. She went back to the kitchen where she saw the pile of dirty dishes in the sink from her and Taylor's big breakfast. She sighed and asked, "Which spot, John?"

"Lyric's." He couldn't help the smile that crept on his face. She agreed to meet him, which he hoped meant that she wanted to see him as much as he wanted to see her. Maybe after they discussed the new number she could tell him why she's been avoiding him.

She wasn't ready to see him yet, but… she did decide to say yes to everything today and didn't want to say no, so she left it open-ended. "I'll see what I can do. I'm supposed to meet up with Fusco sometime today anyway. In the meantime, try to stay out of trouble please."

"I'll try my best."

Joss smiled as she disconnected the call. She started on the dishes and called Fusco, speaking to him on speaker.

"Fusco," he grumbled sounding cranky and cantankerous.

"Hey Fusco, I need a favor from you."

"You and everyone else," he replied grumpily.

"Well, I would do it myself, but you know I'm off until next Monday. And you also know I can't just walk in there to get what I need."

Fusco sighed. After all this stuff blew over, he was going to take two weeks off for himself. Carter sounded pretty chipper on her end, so the vacation must have done wonders for her. "What do you need, Carter?"

"Well, first I need to know what time you want to meet today. I need you to fill me in on everything that has happened since I left because we never got a chance to speak to each other during my absence. Second, I need you to pull a file for Chloe Richards, a teen runaway. And third, could you please bring the file with you? _Pretty please_?"

Fusco rolled his eyes at his partner's cheery disposition and syrupy sweet tone as she said _pretty please_. "I can meet you at the park at around 11. I'm supposed to meet Wonderboy to pick up the guard dog." He sighed as his annoyance had already reached peak levels and the day had just begun. "When did I become everybody's Benson? Always on the beck and call," he grouched.

Joss almost dropped the plate she was rinsing. "You're meeting John? I thought you two weren't on the best of terms at the moment?" she asked, repeating what John told her just moments ago.

"Yeah, well _that's_ an understatement. He called me about 20 minutes ago and asked, well more like _demanded_ that I dogsit Bear. As if I don't have a day job. That guy is a real pain in my ass, ya know."

Joss knew the feeling. "What time are you supposed to meet John?"

"At 10:45."

Joss smiled as she found her loophole. She didn't _have_ to meet with John today, maybe another day. She'd get him what he needed, and still meet with him, only at a different time. "Okay, here's what I can do to make your day a little better. Bring the file and give it to John when you pick up Bear. When we meet at 11, you can brief me on everything that happened while I was gone, and I'll take Bear off your hands."

"So you'd rather deal with the four legged guard dog, instead of the two legged guard dog that pulled a gun on me last week?" He snorted. "I completely understand."

Joss stopped the running water from the faucet, not sure she heard Fusco correctly. "Did you say John pulled a gun on you?"

"Yeah, that's how he got the number for your burner phone last week. After that, I figured it would be best to just wait until you got back to update you. Have you talked to him yet? He's been moodier than usual and he's been taking it out on me and probably Glasses, too."

Joss thought about the phone call that day and how John constantly called her after that. _Figures_, she thought. At least Fusco gave her up under duress rather than rat her out for the hell of it. "I spoke to John this morning. That's why I wanted the file. So I'll meet you at the park at 11, right?"

"Not so fast, Carter. I mean have you _talked_ to him, yet?" he asked, inferring the issue of contention between the two of them regarding Detective Stills. "He asked me what was going on but I didn't tell him because he already had a gun pointed at me. No need to urge him to pull the trigger. I've already put my foot in my mouth one time and that was one time too many, if you ask me."

Joss sighed and rolled her eyes. She took her time to answer as she drained the dishwater in the sink and dried her hands. "No, I haven't _talked_ to him yet, but I will." She could hear Fusco coughing on his end and it sounded like he said "bullshit" in his coughing fit. "I promise, Fusco."

"You two act like an old married couple, you know that? And I ain't no marriage counselor so whatever it is, youse two need to work it out."

"What?" she glared at the phone as if Fusco could see her.

"Never mind, just meet me at the park at 11. I'm holding you to your deal about watching Bear."

"Thanks Fusco. I'll see you then."

* * *

_(8 days ago)_

"No, not yet. I gotta set this up in a way that's less obvious." Jennifer saw Joss and Jacqueline heading back in her direction. "Jan, call me back in like 20 minutes. I think it's time to pull out the big guns this time so we can get our girl back. Can I count on you to do this? Get this right?"

Janice sucked her teeth. "Of course I can Jen. I'm not an idiot. I can practice tact."

"Okay. Gotta run. Bye." She disconnected the call moments before Joss and Jackie joined her, taking the two vacant beach chairs next to her.

Joss flopped into the chair on the left side of Jennifer. "I think I drank this punch too fast. I'm already buzzing," she said setting the empty jar on top of Jacqueline's cooler. "Who were you talking to just now?"

"Silly PTA stuff. Mrs. Williams was freaking out about the book fair coming up at Melody's school," Jennifer lied giving a brief look over to Jackie settling down in her own chair and reaching for the cooler to refill their glasses. She passed the refilled jar back down to Joss, and topped off Jennifer's jar that wasn't empty yet.

Joss smiled as she took the refill. "You know Jenny, I would have never thought you'd become the quintessential stay at home, president of the PTA, organizer of bake sales, soccer mom. Out of all of us, I just knew you'd be the one jet setting around the world taking pictures of beautiful people and beautiful places." She took a long sip of the fruity punch.

Jennifer smiled. "I do freelance work for the local paper. And I also take family portraits, but it's mostly of hubby and the kids who are marching in line on their way over here as I speak." The three women turned to look at Jennifer's family make their way to the beach. "I still do what I love, just in a different format."

Jennifer's husband Marcus was the leader of the pack, marching and singing a cadence as the group of children marched and laughed behind him. Once Melody spotted Joss, she was the first to break formation and ran as fast as her little seven year old legs could carry her. "Jossy!" she shouted as she hopped in Joss' lap.

Joss gave her an affectionate hug and big sloppy kiss on her cheek. Melody almost collapsed into a fit of giggles. "Hey Melody, baby I missed you."

"I missed you, too. You said on Skype that you were gonna come down to visit but it took you forever," Melody said as she absently pulled on one of her pigtails.

"Well I'm here now. And Taylor's here too."

Melody shrieked. "Where is he?" she asked excitedly.

"Well, he's not here right now because he went to spend time with his new friends, but he'll be back," she looked at the time on her burner phone. "He should be back really soon."

"I can't wait to see him. Can he go with us to Myrtle Beach?" She stood from Joss' lap and went to stand in front of her mother. "Mommy, can Taylor come with us?"

Before either woman could answer her, the rest of the family made it over. Her husband, Marcus came over followed by Marcus Jr., the oldest at 11; Michelle, the second oldest at 10; Thomas, the third oldest at 9; and finally Antoinette, the fourth child at 8 years of age. Everybody got so caught up in hugs, kisses, and greetings that Melody never got her answer. Not that she forgot.

After the hullabaloo, she pulled on her mother's sundress and said, "Mommy, you didn't say yes. Can Taylor come with us to Myrtle Beach?"

Jennifer couldn't help but smile. If they could get Taylor out of the picture, there wouldn't be anything holding Joss in Charleston so that when Janice called it would all work. She just hoped that Joss would say yes. Who knew that Melody would be a helpful accomplice to her last minute plan? _She's turning out to be more like her Aunt Janice_, she thought. "That's up to your big cousin. I don't have a problem with it. There's plenty of room in the condo."

All of a sudden, all eyes were on Joss. She felt as if she was being put on the spot. On one hand, she wanted to spend more time with Taylor. On the other hand, he'd already found new friends to spend time with cutting into their time together and leaving her to dwell on her current predicament. She wasn't really up for any more of _that_, either. "I don't know guys…" she was cut off by the shrill of Jennifer's cell phone. _Saved by the bell_, Joss thought.

_Right on time_, Jennifer thought as she picked up the phone and answered it on speaker. "Hey Janice! You'll never guess who's sitting right next to me."

"Who?" Janice asked, feigning ignorance. Jennifer smiled and passed the phone to Joss.

"Hey Janice," Joss said into the phone.

"Jossy-bear!"

* * *

_(2 days ago)_

After having meetings in the conference room for the early part of the morning, Ethan was finally able to step into his office. As he walked in, he noticed that Paula had a new assistant. He wondered how long this one would last. She was a pretty woman, but she had a sort of menace about her. Or was it just the scowl on her face? _Paula must be working this one pretty hard already,_ he thought and chuckled to himself. Paula must have heard him laughing because she looked up from typing out the notes from their early morning meeting and gave him a smile.

"Want to let me in on the joke?" She picked up several papers and gave them to him. "These are the contracts that you need to look over that require your approval and signature." She gave him a smaller set of papers. "These are your messages. The most urgent messages are on top. Looks like there's an issue with the London branch, but I think it can wait to be discussed on your conference call this afternoon."

Ethan sighed. He had a bit of a lover's hangover from the last couple days and he just wasn't ready to get back in the groove of things at the office. He could barely concentrate in any of the meetings this morning. "I'll get on these as soon as I can. I just need a minute." He looked over to Shaw who was now looking up from her work and watching them with interest. "I see you have a new assistant, Paula. Who's the lovely lady?"

Shaw was able to observe the two people talking in front of her. Standing next to each other they almost looked like a real life Barbie and Ken, Shaw mused. She noticed that Paula's almost lifeless brown eyes warmed and brightened at the sight of Ethan walking into the office. But as soon as he asked about her, those same warm eyes suddenly turned cold and her soft smile stiffened into a grimace. "This is Regina Sanderson. She's a temp, but very effective so far," she said dismissively.

Shaw stood from her seat and walked over Ethan taking him in. He was even more handsome in person. He was tall, at a little over 6 feet and towered over her short stature. The dark blue suit he wore was tailored to show off the broad shoulders that tapered into a narrow waist. He wore a navy blue and white gingham shirt with a solid yellow silk tie and matching pocket square. On his feet, he wore dark brown leather wingtip shoes, which were likely to be Italian and expensive but not nearly as expensive as the watch on his wrist. He even smelled as good and expensive as he looked. "It's nice to meet you Mr. Bradley," she said as she shook his hand.

"It's a pleasure to meet you too, Regina." After he released her hand, he said, "Don't let old Paula here scare you off. She's really a big old softie." He grinned and winked at Paula and she glared at him.

Shaw smirked at the exchange and wondered just what the history was between the two of them. "I don't scare easily," she said looking directly at Paula.

"That's good. So you shouldn't be too scared to get back to work," Paula replied with a smile that didn't meet her eyes.

Noticing the tension filled exchange, Ethan tried to lighten the mood. "Play nice, Paula. Give Regina a break here. As a matter of fact Regina why don't you grab a cup of coffee or tea? Take a break." He looked to Paula and spoke directly to her. "Paula, I'll be in the office if you need me."

He walked into his office and put the contracts and messages on his desk. He unbuttoned and shrugged off his jacket placing it on the back of his chair and took his cell phone out of his pocket before taking a seat in the chair behind his desk. He had been busy all morning and now he finally had a moment to himself. He scrolled through his contacts and came across Joss' name. He wanted to call her or even text her to see how she was doing. She was on his mind again and he'd been daydreaming about her during the board meeting this morning. This woman was really throwing him for a loop. Just as he was about to hit send, his phone rang and he saw his friend and business partner, Gabriel's name pop up on the screen.

"Hey Gabe, what's going on?"

"Hey Ethan, are you busy right now? I saw on the calendar that you were in meetings most of the day, so I was hoping to catch you in between meetings."

"Well, the New York branch is a lot busier than the Atlanta one. If you weren't engaged to be married to Janice I'd make you work up here and take your place," Ethan replied jokingly.

"Aw man, I wish. I miss the feel of the big city. Atlanta is nice, but it's not New York."

"Yeah, that's for sure," Ethan snorted. "Atlanta's less tense and the people, while just as phony sometimes are less angry at the world. Did you need something?"

"Yeah, I did. I'm sorry but I won't be able to make it to the fundraiser on Wednesday." Gabriel said reluctantly.

"_What?_ What do you mean you can't go? One of us needs to be there to show face since the company makes a generous donation every year. You know I hate going to those things. I went last year and it's your turn to go this year. The only reason I tolerated it last year is because I knew the proceeds were going to The Boys and Girls Club of America. You know I can't stand those phony elitists. They're pretentious and annoying."

"I know, I know. But Jan is making me go to this hair contest…competition or something. I don't know what she called it."

"A hair show?" Ethan asked, curiously.

"Yep! That's what she called it. A hair show. Do you know what it is?" Ethan smiled as his friend proceeded without waiting for an answer. "She says she wants my support while her salon competes. I don't understand how hair stylists compete with each other. I have no idea what I've agreed to, but she really wants me there so I'll be there."

Ethan couldn't keep the amusement out of his voice. "Oh you're in for a treat, buddy!" He laughed uncontrollably.

"What's so funny? What did I get myself into? Ethan! Ethan, damn it stop laughing and tell me!" Gabriel said irately and started swearing in Greek.

Still chuckling, he answered, "I'll let you be surprised. The only reason I even know what it is, is because of my friend Reggie. You remember him, right?"

"Yeah, your old childhood friend. I met him once at one of your parties at the lake house. He was manning the grill."

"Yeah, that's him. He's always manning the grill. Thinks he's some sort of pit master, you should have seen him a few days ago at his party. He had a on an apron that said _Big Things Choppin'_." Ethan chuckled at the memory. "Well anyway, his sister was one of the uh… I guess you could say _models_, for a local hair show back when we were in high school."

"I don't understand. How did _you_ end up there?"

"He dragged me to the show with him because his mom made everyone in the family go. He said that if he had to go then so did I. Let's just say it's one of those once in a lifetime type of things. I really think you'll get a kick out of it. Jan's a stylist, so you should enjoy seeing her work in her element."

"I guess so, but with the way you reacted, I'm still a bit wary about it..."

Gabriel's voice trailed off as Ethan took the phone away from his ear after hearing a knock at the door. Paula peeked in around the door before she walked into the room. Seeing that he was on a call, she walked to his desk and whispered, "This came for you from Ms. Morgan. She said she couldn't stay because she had another appointment, but assured that this is everything you asked for." She placed the large legal envelope on his desk. He mouthed a silent thank you to her. She smiled, nodded her head, and quietly left the room. He picked up the phone again barely paying attention to the conversation as he began to open the envelope and pulled out the file.

"...She says it's something I should put on my bucket list. I told her I wasn't dying. But then she starts going on and on about how I should live a little and that I don't have to be dying to have a bucket list and blah blah blah."

That little tidbit caught Ethan's attention. He put the file down on his desk unopened. "Wait, go back. What did you say?"

"What?"

"You said Janice asked you to put it on your bucket list?"

"Yeah. So what? I don't actually have a list, but I let her think I do. It makes her happy. You know I'll do anything to keep her happy."

"But what was her reason again?"

"Wow, no jokes or wisecracks about how I'm whipped? Are you okay today? Anyway, she went on this platitude about living life to the fullest with no regrets. She told me that if she never made the list and tried to do some of the things on her bucket list we would have never met."

Ethan looked at the file on his desk still closed. "Gabe, let me call you back."

"But wait, what about the fundraiser?"

"Yeah, whatever I'll do it." Ethan disconnected the call and sat back in his chair.

_Well that explains everything_, he thought. From what he knew about Joss he could tell she was a person that lived by the book. From their many conversations he knew she served in the military, she was a cop, and on top of that she was a single mom raising a teen aged son. Of course her life could start to get repetitive and hum drum. He saw that even though she appeared to be a straight arrow, there was a fun, fearless and spunky woman underneath that just wanted to live a little.

Ethan picked up the file and put it back in the envelope. He realized that he had gone about this the wrong way. He was treating Joss like an acquisition instead of a woman that he was interested in having a relationship with. He got up from his desk and walked over to the large shredder in the far corner of his office. He watched as the envelope slowly went into the shredder as a whole to be decimated into tiny pieces in the wastebasket below.

He went back to his desk, took the folded sheet of paper from his front jacket pocket, sank into his chair and opened it. Looking at the items, again in a different light he smiled to himself. _If you wanna live a little, then I'm sure I can help with that_, he thought. He sat forward and pressed the intercom button on the phone on his desk.

"Paula?"

"Yes, Mr. Bradley?"

"Can you come in here? I need your help with something."

"I'll be there in a moment," she said before she signed off from the intercom. She looked over to Shaw who just came back with a cup of coffee. "Ms. Sanderson, I'm going to be in a meeting with Mr. Bradley so I need you to handle the phones while I'm away from my desk. I shouldn't have to tell you that you shouldn't accept any calls during that time, should I?"

At this point, Shaw held no pretenses and simply looked at Paula with a cold stare. "No. I understand what I need to do."

"Very well. If you'll excuse me." She gathered a notepad and pen before she stood up, walked to the heavy wooden door of Ethan's office, and entered his office once again, quietly closing it behind her. She took a seat in one of the chairs in front of his desk and waited for him to begin. She noticed he was intently reading something on an unfolded sheet of paper and hadn't looked up at her since her arrival. She cleared her throat to get his attention. He still didn't look up from the paper so she decided to speak up.

"Mr. Bradley... Ethan? What did you need help with?"

He finally looked up and gave her a quizzical look. "Have you ever made a bucket list?"

"I'm sorry, a what?"

"Bucket list."

Paula looked at him in confusion, not sure where this conversation was headed and had a feeling it was veering towards the personal. She had been his assistant for over seven years now and they were beyond the boss/subordinate level in their relationship. They were partners, friends even. She knew him like the back of her hand. It was a necessity actually. If she didn't know him as well as she did, she wouldn't be able to do her job efficiently.

She knew that Ethan was very focused, smart, and determined when it came to business- he had a drive like no other and when he set his mind on achieving a goal there was no stopping him. He usually gets what he wants when it came to business, and even when it came to personal matters. However, he was sometimes fickle when it came to that. The man went through his share of supermodels, starlets, and socialites like any wealthy bachelor would; maybe more so than others. He was a good looking and charming man with money. That's catnip to those types of women. Heck, it was catnip to most women in general.

Although he dated a lot, he was always a gentleman. He never led the women on and they understood what they were in for- though there were a few who didn't know how to let go, wanting very badly to snag one of New York's most eligible bachelors. He appeared to be very happy with his life, but lately he's been in a funk and with the FBI investigation he'd downright been moody.

When he asked her to clear his schedule at the end of last week and she figured it was because he wanted to spend a bit more free time in his home town. Hang out with his childhood and college friends. Get some much needed downtime before getting back to the day to day bustle that had become their lives. All day meetings, working nights; sometimes so late that they wouldn't leave until after the nighttime cleanup crew left. Since his return he's been unusually chipper and now he was asking her about bucket lists? _What in the world happened in the last three days?_

"Can't say that I have. Why do you ask?" she asked as a more horrifying thought popped up in her mind. "Oh god, are you dying?" she asked fearfully.

He chuckled as he remembered having the same thoughts when he discovered the list. "No, I'm not dying."

Paula let out a sigh of relief. "So what is this all about?"

"I met someone," he said and Paula could see his eyes light up at the mention of this mystery woman.

"Okay..." she said, urging him to continue.

"And I want to take her out."

_Aha!_ _That's what's going on with him, _she thought. Paula shook her head and prepared to take notes. "Okay, so should I make your usual dinner reservations at Atelier? For tonight? And I need to call the florist to deliver a dozen long stemmed red roses. Do you have her address?"

Ethan looked at Paula in disbelief. "Am I really that predictable?"

She gave him an incredulous look. "Well, this is usually par the course for the women you date. If you really like them, you sometimes fly them out to San Francisco for the weekend. Should I also set that up?"

He looked agitated as he shook his head. "No. No to all of it. That's... that's not what I want for her. She's not just anybody. She's... special. I want to do something special." He looked down at the list again. "Like dance lessons," he said, grinning as he looked up to Paula.

She wore an impassive expression on her face, not sure what to make of what he was telling her. "Dance lessons?" She asked as she raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, dance lessons." Noticing her frown he continued. "Aw, come on Paula, chin up! I think it's time you earned your pay," he teased, his green eyes twinkling in amusement.

She glared and smiled at him at the same time. Shaking her head, she started writing notes in the notepad on her lap. "Okay, got it. Dance lessons. What else, Casanova?"

* * *

_(7 days ago)_

_I can't believe I let Janice talk me into this. I should have joined Taylor and gone to Myrtle Beach with Jennifer's family,_ Joss thought as she pulled into the driveway of a very large white craftsman style home with black shutters in the cul de sac. The lawn looked as if it was professionally manicured and the landscaping gave it a very welcome feeling now that the flowers were in bloom for the season. An array of yellows, reds, and purples caught her eye as she took the house in.

As she stepped out of the car, she looked up the street and saw an elderly white man with silver hair watering his rose bushes. She also noticed a family of four riding on a golf cart taking a trail to the wooded area behind the house next door. The young children were blowing bubbles at each other and Joss wondered exactly where they were going. When she first entered the small city on her way to Janice's house, she noticed other families traveling on golf carts as well. _This is beyond the average suburb. It's like Mayberry with golf carts._ _I'm definitely not in New York anymore._

She popped the trunk and grabbed her bags, closing it before walking to the front door of the house. The porch expanded across the front of the house with potted flowers stationed at the top of the stairs on both sides. To her right Joss noticed ceiling fans lazily turning above a sitting area with outdoor wicker furniture. On the far left side of the house she noticed four white rocking chairs and Joss had to grin. _Just like grandma_. She hoped she was at the right home, because it would be embarrassing to ring the bell and have some stranger answer the door. Joss pressed the button of the doorbell and waited as she heard small dogs barking and a familiar voice yelling at them. _"Gigi! Prada! Hush all that noise! God! Every time the doorbell rings you two go berserk!"_ Joss smiled at all the commotion she heard coming from the other side of the door. She definitely had the right house.

The door opened and Janice got more excited than the two Yorkies scurrying around her feet. "Jossy-bear! Oh, you made it!" She hurriedly crossed the threshold to the porch to give Joss the tightest of hugs.

Joss couldn't help but chortle at Janice's reaction and hug her back. "Okay, you can let me go Janice. Or at least ease up. I can't breathe." Janice still hugged her tightly. "I did drive five hours to get here. I just want a moment to relax."

Janice finally let Joss out of her embrace and said, "And relax you shall, Joss. Dinner will be ready in a bit. Tonight is fiesta night. Texas fajitas and margaritas! Come in. Let me get those bags for you. For the next few days, mi casa es su casa."

"You cooked?" Joss asked as she stepped into the large home.

"No! I had Joe, our personal chef make them for us."

"You have a personal chef?" Joss looked at her in disbelief. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah. Gabe says I shouldn't have to worry about preparing meals since I work most of the day in the shop. I agree. There's nothing better than coming home from a long day at work and having a fresh meal already prepared for you."

Joss nodded. There were plenty of days where she was too tired to cook and she and Taylor would have to rely on takeout. "Congratulations on your engagement. I didn't even know you two had gotten so serious. Looking at the size of this house, he's very serious about making an honest woman out of you," Joss joked.

Janice smiled as she led Joss up the stairs to the guest suite. The small dogs followed at their heels. "Thanks. He proposed on Valentine's Day. He can be such a romantic sap sometimes, but I love him," she giggled. They finally reached the guest bedroom and Janice opened the door. Joss took a peek around Janice and was shocked at the guest room. It was beautifully decorated and looked like a picture from Southern Living magazine.

The walls were a rich buttercream color but the focus of the room was the bed which made the room so cheerful. The nail studded headboard was covered in a blue-green fabric with a bed skirt in the same matching fabric. The bed sheets were a crisp white and the pillows were stacked on top of each other in different floral patterns with a sunny yellow duvet at the foot of the bed. The room had fresh daisies in a simple glass vase on a table by the window. The wall sconces on either side of the headboard gave the room a professionally designed look, but the black and white photos on the wall of Charleston taken by Jennifer gave it a personal touch.

"Janice this is beautiful."

"Thanks. There's a bathroom attached. It has a garden tub, but if you wanted Jacuzzi jets, you can use the whirlpool tub in the master bathroom. Why don't you freshen up and when you come downstairs we can have dinner and drinks and catch up. Sound good?"

She took a look at the large garden tub in the bathroom and knew she wouldn't have any problems taking a nice long soak. "Sounds great."

* * *

_Joe is a fantastic chef_, Joss thought as she finished her dinner. These had to be some of the best fajitas she's ever tasted. She stood to clear the plates and Janice stopped her. "No, Joss. You're a guest in my home. Let me get these cleared up and I'll refill our drinks. How was the fish fry at grandma's last night?" She asked as she carried the dishes to the sink to rinse them.

"It was so much fun. Uncle Charlie showed up and showed out."

"Oh, gosh. Did Uncle Charlie get drunk and try to get everyone to do the cupid shuffle again?"

Joss laughed at the memory. "Yes! And he tried to do the dougie. Taylor had to show him how to do it correctly. I think Jennifer took pictures. I haven't laughed like that in a long time," her voice faded at the end of her last statement and it didn't go unnoticed by Janice.

"So, Joss… Tell me what's been going on with you lately." She placed the dishes in the dishwasher and walked to the fridge to remove the pitcher of margaritas. "Pass me our glasses on the table."

Joss grabbed the glasses from the kitchen table and placed them on the countertop of the island in front of Janice. "Not much. I've been really busy with work lately. I think I'm burnt out."

Janice poured the alcoholic beverage in the two margarita glasses and pushed one towards Joss. She took a sip of her own and said nothing, waiting for Joss to continue.

"So I requested some time off and thought it would be a good idea to come visit grandma and the rest of the family. I needed some sun. It was still cold enough for my coat when we left."

Janice nodded her head. "Right… anything else you want to talk about?"

Joss looked at Janice coolly. "What's with the interrogation, Jan?"

"It's not an interrogation; I just want you to talk to me. When I spoke to Janice yesterday she told me about your behavior- or at least what Aunt Vicky described. That you were zoning out, constantly checking your cell phone, and being overall temperamental at times. She told me that Aunt Vicky said you've been working a lot lately and that some guy you were dating from work got killed in the line of duty. Is that what it is?"

Joss sighed. "That's only a small part of it. Cal and I were dating, but it never got serious or heavy. Well, it almost did, but…" She thought about losing the FBI offer. "It just didn't work out." She took a big gulp of her margarita and tried to change the subject. "Wasn't Jennifer supposed to send you the pictures from last night? Maybe you should check your email. I really want to see those pics."

Janice smiled at Joss' attempt to change the subject. "Sure. I left my laptop in the family room." She grabbed the pitcher and her glass and walked out of the kitchen. "You mind grabbing the chips and salsa? Our conversation isn't done by the way," she said over her shoulder.

* * *

Joss ended up telling Janice some of what was going on with her. Not everything, but some of it. The alcohol or maybe the need to get a load off her shoulders gave her the courage to talk. Janice didn't seem to be fazed at all. Surprisingly, she understood.

"Why was that so hard to tell me, Joss? You've always been the type to try to help people so it's not a surprise that you would help some mysterious vigilante duo prevent bad things before they happen. It has to be a rewarding feeling to prevent a homicide instead of trying to solve one. But I know you're not telling me everything. You're one tough woman. You did tours in Afghanistan interrogating terrorists, you went to law school and passed the bar, you've raised Taylor as a single mom, and now you're a detective for the NYPD. You're tough as nails. I highly doubt that bending a few laws would affect you in this way. What happened to you?"

"I don't want to say. I just feel like I've lost myself. I've done things I'm not proud of, and I can't do anything to change it." Joss looked at the ice clink around the bottom of her glass and reached for the pitcher to pour herself another drink.

"Well of course you can't change it. It's in the past. The things you've done that you say you're not proud of, was it for selfish reasons or was it to help someone?"

"It was to help someone. I thought they deserved a second chance," she said, thinking of John and Fusco.

"It sounds like you've already come to terms with what you've done. The next step is to accept it. You may not be the same goody two shoes that you were, but no one remains the same. We all have to change and grow. You're still a good person, a good mom, a good cop. And from what it sounds like, a damn good friend. Maybe you're not the one with the problem. Maybe it's your 'friends' that need to take a look at themselves. It doesn't seem fair that you're the only one going through the motions."

"That's just it Janice, I chose to help them. _I chose_ to do the things I did. That's on me, not them."

"So accept it and move on! You can't walk around like a zombie, Joss. It's not good for you and it's not good for Taylor. You have to live. Be the person I know you are. Do things you've always wanted to do. Live everyday like it's your last with no regrets."

Joss took a sip of her drink. "When did you become so philosophical Janice?"

Janice laughed. "I don't know about philosophy, but I do know that sometimes we have to be a little bit selfish."

"Selfish?"

"Yeah. Selfish. Do what you want to do without worrying about what someone else thinks. Maybe you should make a bucket list."

"Oh good grief, Janice are you serious? Ever since you wrote that stupid list several years ago, you've been trying to get people on your bandwagon."

"Maybe instead of saying it's stupid you should give it a try."

"No."

"Come on, Joss. Humor me."

"Absolutely not."

"Jossy-bear, please give it a try. At least think of five things you've always wanted to do, but haven't done and would like to do before you kick the bucket."

Joss sighed in exasperation. She decided to agree to it because she knew that Janice would annoy her until she went through with it. "Fine. I need a pen and paper."

Janice grabbed the laptop from the coffee table. She opened it and logged in to open a new document in Microsoft Word. She typed _**Jocelyn's Bucket List**_ at the top and hit enter. She gave the laptop to Joss. "Here you go. Time to get started."

Joss looked at the blinking cursor on the screen and started thinking about what she wanted to type. She smiled and began.

_**1) Cut my hair  
2) Take formal dance lessons  
3) Learn a foreign language  
4) Try a new dish every day for a month  
5) Be a contestant on "The Price is Right"**_

"Joss, let me see what you have so far." Janice took a look at the computer screen and frowned. "Are you serious? Come on, be for real!" Joss glared at her, so Janice softened her approach. "Sorry. What I meant to say is what you have so far is... _nice_. I mean, who doesn't want to be on 'The Price is Right'? But put some juicy stuff on the list!" Joss takes another sip from her third, or was it her fourth margarita and starts typing again.

_**6) Take a road trip from coast to coast  
7) Explore a waterfall cavern  
8) Throw a dart at a map & travel to wherever it lands  
9) Go zip lining in Hawaii  
10) Learn how to surf**_

"Okay, there's ten. That's more than what you asked for. I'm done with this stupid list." Joss moved the computer from her lap and reached for the chips and salsa. Janice read through the last five and still wasn't satisfied.

"Joss, what is the point of making this list if you're not going to take it seriously. This sounds like an itinerary for your travel agent, not a bucket list. I know there's got to be some crazy, wild stuff you've always secretly wanted to do, but was too much of a goody two shoes to do. It's just me and you. No one else is going to see this list. I mean really, how bad could it be?"

"I didn't want to make this list in the first place. This was your idea, remember?" Joss came back to the computer and stared at the screen. She started to type again.

_**11) Take an exotic dance class  
12) Learn to fly a helicopter  
13) Drive an Aston Martin 100+ mph on the autobahn in Germany  
14) Say yes to everything for a day  
15) Watch the sunset from a hot air balloon  
16) Have a picnic on a deserted island  
17) Go skinny dipping  
18) Have a one-night stand  
19) Play strip poker  
20) Fall in love again**_

Joss sighed after she typed the last item on the list. "I'm done now. I'm not adding anything else to this list." She gave the laptop to Janice and lied down on the couch because she was beginning to feel woozy from the margaritas.

"Wow… Now _this_ is what I'm talking about Joss! Oh my gosh! You really never went skinny dipping?" Janice laughed.

Joss only looked at her and ignored her question. "That's my list. I'm over it now. Can we just watch a movie until we fall asleep now?"

Janice smiled as she saved the list. "Fine, Joss. I'm gonna print this out and then we can find something to watch on Netflix. Do you watch Scandal?"

"Don't have time to watch much TV. Isn't it that show about the woman sleeping with the President?"

Janice rolled her eyes. "There's more to it than that, Joss."

"Whatever. Just get it started."

"Fine, but we can't be up all night. I have plans for us tomorrow."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

_(2 days ago)_

Joss finally got around to checking her voice messages. Four of the messages were from last Saturday and were mostly the sound of someone hanging up the phone. She assumed those messages where from John when he tried to call her. Three of the messages were calls from her cousin Jennifer who obviously didn't realize that she didn't have her cell phone with her. Another message was from Jacqueline who was likely calling on behalf of Jen because she didn't want to be a nag and leave a fourth message. One message was from her dentist's office reminding her of an appointment coming up later this week. The last message was from her old law school friend Abby, who called her on Saturday.

"_Hey Jocelyn! It's Abby! I was just calling to catch up and see how you were. Maybe we could meet for lunch? It's been months since we last saw each other and I miss my girl! Call me back so we can set something up. Smooches!"_

Joss smiled as she deleted the last voice message and returned Abby's call.

"Hi Joss!" She said cheerfully through the phone. It was infectious, especially since Joss was already in a good mood.

"Hey Abby! Sorry I missed your call a few days ago. I was out of town."

"No worries. I'm glad you called back. I've got some good news to share with you. Can you meet me for lunch today? Around noon?"

"Yes, but I've agreed to dog sit today; and I'm picking up the dog at 11. Can we meet around one o'clock somewhere that's pet friendly? I won't be able to do the fancy dining establishment today," she teased. Abby always had a taste for the expensive. Anytime they met for lunch, the tab was always ridiculous. Even during lunch hour.

"Well, we can always meet at The Highline. It's an outdoor food court and I think it's pet friendly. The weather is supposed to be really nice today."

"Isn't that in the meat packing district on 18th?"

"That's the place. So I'll see you there at one?"

Joss smiled and had no problem saying yes to this. "Yep. I'll see you there." She disconnected the call and walked into her bedroom to search her closet for something to wear. She smiled at her new dilemma of having too much to choose from instead of having nothing to wear. She sifted through the dresses, blouses, slacks, and skirts donning designer names.

Prada. Marc Jacobs. Dolce & Gabana. Michael Kors. Gucci.

Any of these pieces would have been perfect for the usual meet up at the white tablecloth restaurants where she usually met Abby. But today would be more casual and the temps were set to hit the high 70s today. She decided on a very fun, springy, and casual look. She pulled out a pair of white denim skinny jeans and a light turquoise scoop-neck top with crossover braiding detail on the back. She grabbed a pair of teal blue wedge sandals and decided to break the monochromatic look with a coral handbag she purchased in Charleston. She added a few teal and coral accessories to complete the look and went to the bathroom to start on her hair and makeup.

* * *

Fusco waited at the park for Reese to show up, grouchier than he was a couple hours ago. He looked at his watch. _10:43 AM._ _Two more minutes_, he thought.

"Hello, Lionel."

Fusco turned to face the bane of his existence. He thought that maybe he was hallucinating, but it looked like there was a smile on John's face. Not a smirk, but a smile. Fusco figured it was because he spoke to Carter earlier. He gave John the file on Chloe. "Carter said you needed this." He noticed that the small smile on John's face faltered and it was replaced with the same stoic look as normal.

John took the folder and gave Bear's leash to Fusco. "I'll stop by to pick him up later," he said before turning around and walking off.

"You're welcome," Fusco yelled out to John's back as he left the park.

John barely heard Fusco as he walked away. He thought that Joss would bring him the file when they were supposed to meet today, but it looked like she changed her mind. She didn't want to see him and was avoiding him again now that she had returned. She sounded happy today so he figured they would be able to meet and just talk. He thought things had turned around for him, but now he felt worse than he did when he woke up this morning. _I knew today was going to be a bad day._

He wished he knew what it was that she was upset with him about. Whatever it was, it had to be serious because the last time she ignored his calls it was because he gave up the location of the safe house to Elias and got Szymanski shot in the process. He found a bench outside the park and took a seat to look in the file. After reading the statements of the parents, something seemed off. He took note of the address and decided to pay them a visit for a few questions under his Detective Stills persona.

* * *

_(6 days ago)_

_"Well, Carter. I don't know who to trust anymore. When 'The Man in the Su_–_ when John here, slipped away the first time I knew he had a mole. Someone on the inside. Then when his fingerprints went missing and his DNA got switched, I was forced to consider it might be you. And I'll admit you played a pretty good game. Until I put him in the yard alone. And that's when I saw it… in your eyes. Genuine concern. How'd he turn you Carter? What was your price?" Donnelly looked at Carter in the rearview mirror._

_She looked at John before she answered, but he wouldn't look at her. She willed him to look at her, but he refused. She wanted him to know that he meant a lot to her, that their friendship meant a lot to her. "No price. Just helping a friend."_

"_Then you've been played for a fool. Recruited as an asset for a private intelligence_–_"_

_"You don't understand, Donnelly. He's a good man. We're helping people."_

"_Oh, god! Is that what he told you? Wake up, Carter! Your 'friend'," he spat out bitterly, "is nothing more or less than a highly trained murderer. You don't wind up with that job by accident. He chose that life. He chose to become the monster that he is… Now you've made your choice, too."_

_She sighed and shook her head deciding not to respond any further. He didn't understand. He wouldn't understand. She knew where he was coming from because she had been that rigid once. Besides, he was just doing his job._

_The silence in the SUV was broken by the ringing of Donnelly's cell phone. "Who is this?" He asked before they were hit by a speeding truck with so much force that it flipped the car over several times. Joss could feel her body being tossed around like a rag doll. Her shoulder felt like it was dislocated and she felt a sharp pain in her ribs. She could feel herself losing consciousness and she tried hard to stay awake._

_She heard the sound of slow, steady footsteps approach the overturned SUV. Joss tried to lift her head, but couldn't. It was like she was paralyzed and could only lie there while she heard two gunshots muted by a silencer as they hit and killed Donnelly. She heard more footsteps, but this time on the other side of the vehicle near John._

_"Hey, lover. Miss me?"_

_That was the last thing she heard before fading into the comfort of darkness that her unconsciousness provided._

_She later awakened by the shrill sound of Donnelly's cell phone. She slowly lifted her head and felt dizzy. There was a burning sensation above her eyebrow and she reached up to rub it and felt blood. Her blood. She'd been injured worse than she thought. The ringing of the cell phone continued and she could feel it reverberating in her ears. She was in so much pain._

_She fumbled around until she was able to reach the phone and answered it. It was Finch. He was asking if they were okay. She looked to see that John was gone and saw Donnelly's lifeless body. He was dead. He was dead because he was doing his job. He was dead because he'd caught her and The Man in the Suit_–_ or just John, since he knew now._

_She found the keys to the handcuffs in his pocket and gently put her arm down after removing the cuffs. She slowly climbed out of the overturned vehicle and gingerly stepped out into the empty street. She looked north and south and didn't see a soul. It felt so eerie._

_Finch was trying to convince her to leave but she couldn't. She couldn't just leave Donnelly there, she couldn't leave the scene. This was all her fault. If she had just kept her feelings in check this wouldn't be happening. Everything was going according to plan. She destroyed the prints, swapped the DNA samples. Everything checked out._

_If she hadn't been so emotional about John being brutally beaten in the prison yard, they wouldn't have gotten caught. If she had just went home instead of seeking him out... If she had just kept her feelings and emotions in check…if she… she could feel herself starting to have a panic attack. But Finch's words brought her back._

_"I understand, Joss. But things will get a lot more complicated if you don't."_

_She dropped the phone and ran south, the abandoned buildings passing by her in a blur. She thought she saw a car parked at the end of the street. Maybe she could hotwire the car and get out of here so she could find John._

_It seemed as if the closer she got to the car the further away it was. She stopped running, her legs giving out on her as she tried to suck more air into her lungs._

_She bent over and placed her hands on her knees as she tried to catch her breath. She felt a wave of nausea and closed her eyes hoping to quell the urge to throw up. She stood up straight and finally opened her eyes to see a tall brown haired man looking at her in concern._

_"Carter, are you okay? Why are you looking at me like that? As if you've seen a ghost?"_

_Joss closed her eyes, shook her head, and opened her eyes again. He was a ghost. He wasn't really there. "Szymanski, you're not real. You're dead. You're not alive and you're just a ghost. This is just a nightmare I need to wake up from."_

_He looked down at himself and saw the gunshot wound bleeding out from his chest. He looked up at Joss and smirked. "I guess you're right. Why were you running, Carter?"_

_"I couldn't stop it. I tried but I couldn't stop her. I didn't mean for things to go this far. I didn't want Donnelly dead. I was ready to accept my fate."_

_"Fate is a funny thing. I guess it was fate that I got killed after you were able to get me off after HR set me up with that dirty money. That was solid detective work there, Carter. Glad you were there to have my back."_

_"No! I didn't do enough! I couldn't stop it. I couldn't stop them from killing you! And now I can't figure out who did it. I feel like I've let you down because I haven't solved your murder yet. It was my fault they were able to get to you in the first place."_

_"Carter you were doing your job. There's no way you could have known that I would be killed. Hell, even I didn't know until right before it happened." He cocked his head to the side and looked at her curiously. "Come on; let's get you to the car."_

_This time she could reach the car without further issue. He led her to the passenger side, opened the door, and gently guided her inside; making sure she was secure before he closed the door. She laid her head back on the seat and closed her eyes, willing herself to wake up from this dream. She heard the driver's side door open and looked over to see Beecher take a seat behind the wheel and start the car._

_"Where's Szymanski?"_

_"He's dead, Joss. You know that," he said dryly not looking at her, choosing to keep his eyes on the road. All of a sudden a downpour of rain fell in sheets over the windshield. This all felt eerily familiar._

_"I know he's dead. So are you. Why are you driving instead of him?"_

_"You tell me. It's your dream. Even after death you can't seem to trust me. I just can't catch a break."_

_"It wasn't like that, Cal."_

_"Really?" He asked, unconvinced of her answer._

_"Yes really. After losing the opportunity to work for the FBI because of my association with you, I just needed space. Not only that, but you wouldn't tell me the name of the C.I. that gave you that bogus tip on Szymanski."_

_"That C.I. was someone I trusted. And we were momentarily vindicated once that money was found."_

_"That money was planted, Cal! By the same people that killed you. I just can't prove it yet. No matter how many times I look at your case file..." Her voice wavered and tears formed in her eyes._

_"That night when you called me, before I got shot, you wanted to meet up later. Was it to work things out?"_

_"No. It was to end things amicably. I never got the chance... to tell you how sorry I was for thinking you were HR." The car pulled to a stop in front of a restaurant. Joss looked out the window and saw that the restaurant was lit up as if it was open for business, but it looked empty. "Where are we?"_

_She turned to look at Cal and he had vanished. She got out of the car and walked inside the restaurant. The minute she stepped in the building, she was hit with a foul, rancid smell. It was a smell she'd never forget no matter how much she'd like to. She looked in the center of the empty restaurant and saw Fusco sitting at a large round table talking to Stills' decomposed, mud covered corpse. Joss found the nearest wastebasket and vomited. She went to the exit to leave but couldn't open the door. She was locked in._

_"Hey Carter, you're just in time. Come on take a seat," she heard Fusco say from the table. She turned from the door and slowly walked to the table and took a seat next to Fusco._

_"You okay?" he asked, looking at the blood running down the side of her face._

_"Yeah I'm fine," she lied._

_"I guess you are compared to this guy," he said pointing towards Stills "Lose an earring?" Fusco reached in his pocket and placed a small silver hoop earring on the table in front of her. "Figured you might need this."_

_Joss felt both her earlobes and realized that an earring was missing from her right ear. As she put the earring in her ear, she felt someone take a seat next to her. It was John._

_"Hey John. Long time no see, buddy," said the decaying corpse._

_"Not long enough, Stills."_

_Joss felt herself getting nauseous again. The pain from her injuries, the stress, the rancid smell of the corpse… it was all too much. She just couldn't take it anymore. She rose from her seat and John grabbed her by her arm. "You can't leave yet, Joss."_

_"I can't be here with all of you, this… this is toxic. I can't do this anymore, I can't be this person. I'm not this person."_

_John released her arm and unbuttoned a few of the buttons on his shirt. He had on a bomb vest. "Kara says stay or we all blow up."_

_"Why don't you just walk to the roof for another self-sacrifice, John?" She asked cynically as she snatched her arm out of his grip. "It's not like you'll actually let me help you," she huffed as she sat back down._

_Unbeknownst to her, the other guests had arrived, bloody and battered in some way. Donnelly, Szymanski, Beecher, Stills, Terney, and even Yogorov were all battered or bleeding out in some shape or form. The only dinner guest who appeared unscathed physically was Fusco. There was one chair open on the far side of the table directly across from her. Joss had a sinking feeling of who the man of the night would be to finally make an appearance. She didn't have to wait long as he finally walked over to the table._

_"So glad you could make it, Detective Carter," Elias said with a smile as he took the final seat._

Joss awoke from her dream in a cold sweat. She sat up abruptly and quickly regretted it as the room began to spin. "Ugh…" She slowly laid back down and let her eyes do the moving as she got herself together.

At first she didn't recognize where she was. The surroundings were different. She wasn't in her bedroom and she wasn't in the guest room at her grandmother's house. She looked around and saw that she was laying on a large overstuffed sectional in a family room and finally remembered that she fell asleep on the couch last night watching Scandal with Janice.

Joss felt sick, but it wasn't from drinking too many margaritas last night. She could still smell the stench of the corpse from her dream. She hadn't had any dreams for the past two nights and the ones she had before she left New York hadn't been that vivid in quite a while. She took a deep breath and released it slowly so that she could gather her wits about her and sat up.

She noticed that there was a glass of water and two aspirin sitting on the coffee table in front of her next to Janice's laptop. Joss was thankful that Janice was considerate enough to leave her there to sleep and have a remedy ready for when she woke up. She took the two pills and downed the entire glass of water, almost gagging on it towards the end. She stood up and stretched as she saw Janice walk into the room in running shorts, a sports bra, a heart rate monitor on her wrist, and her running shoes.

"Great, you're finally up. Surprisingly early, too. How are you feeling?"

"I need some air," Joss responded trying to shake the remnants of her dream. She felt the need to call Fusco. The dream felt so ominous and she knew something was wrong. _Very wrong_.

"Well, I was just about to go to the lake for a run on the 10k trail. You up for joining me? We can take the golf cart to get there and you'll be able to get some fresh air." Janice looked at her with a hopeful expression. She really wanted to get Joss out of this funk, and the way she looked told her that Joss was dealing with more than a mild hangover right now. She knew Joss had a nightmare because she could hear her talking as she came downstairs. She said something about how something was toxic and that she couldn't do it anymore.

"I guess I could go for a run. Just give me a minute to let the aspirin kick in and get dressed." _And a minute to call Fusco,_ she thought. Joss walked towards the back stairway to go to the guest room where she hadn't slept yet. She stopped and turned to face Janice as a thought crossed her mind. "Janice, didn't you say we had plans today? What kind of plans?"

"Well, I was hoping to do a little bit of aromatherapy at the spa this morning. Manis, pedis, facials, body scrubs, a massage. The works," she smiled. "So a little bit of that and a _whole_ lot of retail therapy."

"The spa sounds great, but I'm not really up for shopping. I only have so much cash I brought with me."

"_Oh_ _we're going shopping_," she said determinedly. "I have Gabe's black card for the day. He told me not to go too crazy. So _I_ won't," she smiled mischievously. "But that doesn't mean, _you_ can't have a little fun."

"Gabe's here?"

"Yeah, he came in late last night. Some sort of board meeting in New York. He won't tell me what's going on, but I can tell it's bothering him. So of course I gave him some much needed TLC and he gave me his black card to have some fun."

"Oh no, Janice. I am not spending that man's money. I barely know the guy and only met him once; the night you two met."

"Okay fine, you can window shop. I won't get you anything," she lied with her fingers crossed behind her back so that Joss wouldn't be able to see.

"Great. Sounds like you've got a fun day planned for us. Let me head upstairs to get dressed." Joss started up the stairs and Janice stopped her before she got to the top of the stairwell.

"Oh wait, Joss that's not the only thing we're doing today." She walked to the stairs and looked up to speak to Joss. "We're also going to a company picnic. It's to celebrate the 15 year anniversary of the opening of the Atlanta branch."

"Where's it going to be?"

"Callaway Gardens. It's a bit of a drive because it's in Pine Mountain, so we need to make time to get there. Gabe already left this morning because he was supposed to meet Ethan there for a round of golf at the course up there. The picnic starts at 3pm."

* * *

_(2 days ago)_

Fusco checked his watch again. It was 10:59 AM and he still hadn't seen or heard from Carter yet. He sat on the bench with Bear sitting by his feet. He looked around for her, but didn't see her. He took his cell phone out of his jacket pocket to check for any texts she may have sent when he felt someone take a seat on the bench next to him.

Bears ears perked up and he seemed very excited about their visitor. Fusco gave a brief glance at the woman next to him and saw that it wasn't Carter so he called her cell phone. It was 11 o'clock now and she was late. He needed to get back to the precinct and he made the decision that there would be no more favors today. He held the phone to his ear and heard the ringing on the other line and then heard the ringtone of the cellphone of the woman sitting next to him. He looked at the woman closer this time and saw Carter looking at him with a smirk.

"Fusco, why are you calling my cell phone when I'm sitting next to you?"

Fusco felt like he had to do a double take. He'd worked with Carter almost every day and he'd seen her outside of work before, but she looked almost like a different person. And it wasn't just the way she was dressed or the fact that she cut her hair. _What a difference a week makes without having to deal with the suit. I'm definitely taking a week off and leaving without a way for anyone to contact me._

"Sorry, for a minute there I didn't recognize you. You look… _different_."

"Good different or bad different?"

"Just different, but in a good way." He gave her Bear's leash. "So I take it that your week off was exactly what you needed?"

"It was Lionel, and I want to thank you for everything you've done. I know you're probably going to give me some bad news, but I really did need that time for myself and to spend with my family. So I can't say I regret it. Thank you for pushing me to go. Looking back on things, I was in no shape to handle things at that time and you stepped in like a real friend." She reached out to hold his hand and show her gratitude. "I appreciate it."

Fusco felt good that she trusted him and saw him as a friend and not just her partner. He cared about her and her wellbeing and she recognized that. But before he could let the warm fuzzies take over, he had to drop the news on her. "Well, before you get all sentimental on me and start shouting out proclamations of love and jumping up and down on the bench like Tom Cruise, I got some bad news for ya."

She smiled and released his hand, turning her body to face him. Ready for whatever he had to say. "Lay it on me, Lionel."

He looked at her with apprehension but didn't want to be a wuss so he came out and said it. "We lost Elias."

She nodded, figuring as much. In Fusco's case – no news was bad news and this was why he never called her back while she was gone and was likely why John kept blowing up her phone. She was actually glad to have avoided all of John's phone calls. She would have been sick with guilt knowing that the mobster she saved managed to get away from Fusco and go into hiding. "Tell me what happened."

"The next day after you left, John and I had to hurry up and move Elias to a safe house because someone gave up our location to the hotline. Finch had been monitoring the police feed and the hotline and discovered that someone gave a tip to where Elias was."

She shook her head, understanding the gravity of that moment. Not only did he and John have to worry about finding a safe house and keeping Elias in line, they also had to make sure they weren't being actively chased by the police. "Okay, you moved him to the safe house. How did you lose him?"

"That's the thing. We couldn't stay put for long at the safe house because someone kept tipped off the cops to our location again. We had to move again. We moved into three safe houses. Each time someone would call the hotline and give our location."

"I know you, John, and Finch were careful so how could someone keep getting the drop on you guys?"

"At first I thought it was John doing it to keep Elias on his toes, and to punish me and you for even saving the guy."

Joss gave Lionel a knowing smile. "So when did you figure out it was Elias dropping dime on himself?"

He frowned as he recounted what happened. "It was after we got ambushed when I was moving him for the _fourth_ time. We were about five minutes away from the new safe house when three black Suburbans surrounded the car and shots were fired as the men aimed at the car. Not to kill us, but to surprise and subdue me and kill the tires. The men got out of the car and grabbed Elias while I was knocked unconscious. In the moment, I was only trying to survive and protect Elias, but looking at it in hindsight there was no need."

"No need because I bet he was completely calm the whole time. Not panicking at all. He must have had some sort of contingency plan in place if he ever managed to escape from Rikers. I'd bet real money that in all the scenarios he came up with, having me save him and you and John keep watch over him in a safe house wasn't something he was prepared for."

"No, but he sure did improvise. I guess he had his minions also listening in on the hotline and police feed."

"Lionel, if he was under your watch how was he even able to get on the phone to call the hotline or call his goons? Finch's safe houses don't have landlines."

"The son of a bitch had a cell phone on him the whole time! He probably made the calls when he was 'using' the restroom or right before he took a shower."

"_What_?" Joss thought back to the night she saved Elias and realized that she never gave him a pat down. She didn't feel it was needed. The man was handcuffed and being transferred out of Rikers. Why in the hell would he have anything on him? "Wait a minute, that doesn't make sense. How did he even get a cell phone?"

"Did you check him after you saved him?" Fusco asked, looking at her with a lifted brow.

"No. You know damn well I didn't. And neither did you." She shook her head and laughed. "_That bastard_."

Fusco snorted, "Yeah. Tell me about it. We thought we had a lead to an abandoned warehouse about four days ago, but it didn't pan out. He's been laying low ever since."

* * *

_(6 days ago)_

"You don't think we're a bit overdressed for a picnic?" Joss asked as she looked at herself in the mirror.

Janice sighed, "Trust me when I say you look fine. I'm surprised you actually let me get you something to wear. I had to use my own credit card so you wouldn't be such a stick in the mud."

Joss looked down at the dress she was wearing. It was a simple sleeveless white cotton a-line dress with a sweetheart neckline and kelly green ribbon to accentuate her small waist. The skirt of the dress flared out around the bottom and hit right above her knees, playfully moving with her as she walked. When they came back to the house from their shopping adventure to get changed and ready for the party, Janice walked into the guest room where Joss was just getting done changing and insisted that she wear the jadeite pendant necklace she had in her jewelry box.

"It was a gift from Gabe that he got for me when we went to China last year. It goes nicely with your dress."

Joss looked at the rectangular shaped pendant with a simple and delicate design of platinum and small diamonds surrounding it. "This is pretty fancy for a picnic, Janice."

"But it's a really simple necklace. Just wear it with the matching ring, and it will be all the accessories you'll need if you feel like it's too much. Come on, Jossy-bear. You'll look so pretty."

She sighed. "Fine, but I'm wearing my own earrings. And I'm not wearing my hair like this. It's too big. You put in too many curls."

"I thought you wanted the big, soft, wavy curls look, Joss? We need to get out of here before we're late." Janice was getting annoyed with Joss. She'd been moody for most of the morning and constantly checking that stupid cell phone of hers.

"It's going to be hot, Janice. It was hot when we went for our run. It was hot when we went shopping. Hell, it's just plain hot! And this is supposed to be outside."

Janice huffed. "Fine!" She grabbed the large round brush from the dresser and picked up a simple elastic black hair band. She roughly brushed Joss' hair up into a ponytail.

"Ow! Janice, damn it that hurts!"

"Well stop acting so damn moody. I swear! First you want it down, now you want it up. So it's going up." After she made finishing touches on her hair and was satisfied with the look, she put the brush down. "Done. Let's go before Gabe starts blowing my phone up, complaining about me being late."

* * *

Fusco knew he screwed up. He screwed up badly. How could he have missed that Elias was the one leaving tips with the cops? He sighed as he waited in the squad car for Wonderboy. Finch called him earlier and told him that they had a lead that Elias could be hiding out at an abandoned warehouse by the docks. He was told to wait here in front of the diner for John so they could check it out together. _Apparently, I need to be supervised now_ he thought scornfully. It wasn't like he was ambushed by six different men working to get the one man with him.

He felt the burner phone vibrate as it rang loudly in his pocket. He took it out and saw that it was Carter calling him for the third time since this morning. He really didn't want to share this with her, so he sent the call to voicemail and turned off the ringer leaving the phone on vibrate.

Just as he put the phone back in his jacket pocket, John opened the passenger side door and climbed in without a greeting. His mood was especially sour today. Fusco knew that John was pissed off about him losing Elias, but there wasn't anything he could do to change what happened.

"Hello to you too, Mr. Happy."

If looks could kill, the look John gave Fusco would have made him drop dead on the spot. "Just drive, Lionel."

After driving in an uncomfortable silence for 35 minutes, Fusco and John arrived at the abandoned warehouse. The only thing that was disruptive on the trip was when Fusco received another call from Carter. He had it on vibrate, but he knew John heard the phone vibrating in his pocket. As Fusco pulled in and shifted the car to park, he remarked on the ramshackle warehouse. "You sure about the lead on this? It doesn't look like anyone has been here in years."

They both got out of the car and walked inside the warehouse. The inside was just as rundown and old as the outside and Fusco was right. No one had been here. He shook his head as he looked at John walk around the warehouse looking for any missed clues and coming up with nothing. His phone rang again and he took it out to quickly divert Carter's call to voice mail.

"New phone, Lionel?" John asked as he walked back over to Fusco from the other end of the warehouse. He'd noticed that the phone was ringing in the car on the way over to the warehouse and it wasn't his main cell. Why did he have another phone and when did he get it? Why was he being so secretive and not answering his calls?

"Yeah, so? What's it to ya?" He asked hoping to deflect.

"Who keeps calling you?"

"Bill collectors. I'm not exactly the richest guy on the planet."

John looked at Fusco with a stone face. Fusco hated it when he got the death stare from John. He knew this wasn't over. "Other than to society Fusco, you don't owe any debts. Give me the phone. I want to know who keeps calling you."

"Screw you. I have a right to privacy."

"How do I know you haven't been ratting out Elias' location with that phone? How do I know you're not working with him and told him to leave before we got here?"

"I haven't and I'm not. So don't get your panties in a bunch, Wonderboy. It's obvious that your lead was a bust, so let's get out of here."

John looked at Fusco with suspicion. He knew the calls weren't coming from bill collectors, and he believed him when he said he wasn't working for Elias. That only left one other person who would be contacting him on a different phone. _Joss_. He felt a level of anger he didn't think he would as he pulled his gun and aimed it at Fusco. "Give me the phone, Lionel."

* * *

As Joss walked into the picnic area with Janice, her burner phone rang. She looked at the caller ID to see Fusco's name pop up. She told him to call her and keep her posted on everything that was going on until she was able to get back, but he hadn't contacted her since they spoke to each other five days ago. After she had that dream, she decided to call him earlier this morning. She called him five times today. By the third phone call, she knew he was purposely diverting her calls to voicemail but she called him anyway. Now that he finally decided to return her calls, Joss' nerves were suddenly on edge. She knew she should have stayed. She knew she should have stayed behind and cleaned up her own mess, but she foolishly let Fusco talk her into leaving and staying away.

"Janice I need to take this. I've been waiting on this call."

"Okay, I'll be at the table towards the center. Take care of your business, but leave that shit in New York once you hang up, Joss. I mean it." Janice gave her a warning look.

Joss rolled her eyes and walked away to a quieter area of the garden. She was surrounded by thousands of vibrant azaleas in full bloom, but didn't notice. She just needed to find a quiet and private place to talk. She walked the wooded trail and braced herself for whatever bad news he had for her, hit the send button, and lifted the burner phone to her ear. "Whaddaya got, Lionel? Is everything okay? I haven't heard from you."

A familiar voice came through the other line, but it didn't belong to Fusco. "Hello, Detective. When did you and Lionel get on a first name basis?"

Joss froze at the sound of John's voice. She hadn't expected to nor did she want to hear from him until she got back. She really didn't know how to respond and now her hackles were definitely up.

"John, where's Fusco? Is he okay?"

John gave a smirk as he lowered the gun he currently had on Fusco. "He's fine." Fusco glared at John and had a new item to add on the list to why John was the bane of his existence. "I asked him if he knew where you were and all he's been able to tell me is that you went south to see your family. I tried your cell and you never pick up." He thought it was better not to tell her that he knew she left her phone behind on purpose. He only wanted to know why she made that decision. Why didn't she want him to contact her and know her whereabouts? "When did you get this phone and where are you, Carter?"

She could hear the tightening of his voice as he asked the last question and noted that she'd been relegated from Joss back to Carter. She audibly sighed and walked over to the small wooden bench where she could sit.

"Let me speak to Fusco, please." She decided that she wouldn't answer any of his questions. What she wanted more than anything was to chew Fusco out for giving John her contact info.

"Not until we can get a location on you. After the stunt you pulled six days ago we've had to deal with the fall out." John looked at Fusco still furious with him for holding out the only way to contact her. He waited on Joss to respond but there was only silence on the other end. He felt his temper rising as the silence wore on. How had this woman managed to get so far under his skin that she would make him lose his cool?

"John, put Fusco on the phone. Now." Joss felt her frustration increasing and only John could get her this angry. But this time he wouldn't be able to charm his way out of it. They were beyond that point now because her trust in him was fractured.

This wasn't about him doing something unwise or starting a bar fight. This was about him keeping things from her. Not trusting her with information that was pertinent to her. She knew if she didn't get him off the phone, there would be things said that she probably couldn't or wouldn't want to take back.

"No. Tell us where you are so that your alibi holds up should they find out it was you that shot Yogorov and Terney that night. What were you thinking? You have no idea of the mess you've made. Shooting the leader of the Russian mafia and a cop?"

Joss let out an empty laugh. "Oh, that is _rich_," she spat out bitterly. "I didn't ask you to clean up my mess. And don't you _dare_ chastise me for my actions." She started to raise her voice as her anger took over. "You don't have that right, not after–" she stopped herself. Now wasn't the time or place for this discussion. She sat back on the bench and took a deep breath to collect herself and gain a bit of control.

"Not after what?" John heard the anger and the bitterness in her voice, but he was thoroughly confused about why it was there. What was she so upset about? She'd been angry with him before but this felt different. He couldn't really describe what this was but it felt like a break up. Like he was losing her or was going to lose her if he didn't get to the bottom of it. She didn't respond so he repeated the question. "Not after what?"

"Put Fusco on the phone. _Now_." How many times did she have to say this? "I'll talk to you when I get back." She'd had enough and this wasn't something to discuss over the phone. She would have this talk with him face to face.

"Just tell me where you are and I will." Joss could hear the hardness in his voice softening and she knew he was not only confused but concerned. The tables had turned and now it was time for him to be left in the dark. She didn't want him to know exactly where she was so she gave him an indirect answer.

"I'm at a picnic with my cousin and her fiancé. That's where I am. Give the phone to Fusco or I hang up."

"Where exactly are you Carter? Don't play games." The only thing he got in return was dead air. She hung up on him. Now he was angry.

Fusco watched all of this unfold and wondered what was being said or not being said on the other end. He knew exactly why Joss was upset with John but was intrigued about their conversation. It sounded more like a lover's spat than a simple disagreement between colleagues or friends – if _that's_ what they called each other.

Was there something going on between Carter and Wonderboy? He knew that John had a soft spot for Carter. He was sweet on her and Fusco would notice the way John would look at her sometimes; the way he would play favorites and how he would talk to her differently from anyone else.

He watched John add Joss' number in his contact list before he returned the burner phone. "If she contacts you or tells you where she is, you let me know immediately. Is that clear?"

"Something going on between you two?" Fusco asked.

John didn't answer the question. Not only because if there was something going on it would be any of Fusco's business, but also because he didn't know how to answer that question if he wanted to. He knew that something had changed between him and Joss after the whole bomb vest ordeal. He just didn't know how to deal with that change and what it would mean for them, so he avoided her. He avoided her for months.

"Let me know if she calls," John replied and walked away leaving Fusco standing alone in the empty warehouse.

Joss threw the burner phone back in her purse in frustration. John was insufferable at times and she knew he would try and continue to call her. That's why she left her cell phone at home and told Fusco not to give out her contact information. She was very upset with John and still wasn't ready to talk to him yet. She was just starting to feel better and think clearer with the time off and one phone call – one fucking phone call from John Reese was enough to knock her off her axis. The phone rang again. She dug into her purse to retrieve it and checked the caller ID. This time it wasn't Fusco's number that popped up but an unknown number. She knew who it was, but didn't answer choosing to divert the call to voice mail. _I really need to have a talk with Fusco about giving out this number_ she thought as she powered off her cell phone.

She got up from the bench in a hurry so that she could return to this fancy outdoor party with Janice. She said this would be a company picnic but it looked more like an afternoon social for the wealthy with the location, the set up, and the appearance of some of the people. Turning to the direction of the party she took off without looking and walked straight into a solid chest.

She looked up into a beautiful pair of green eyes that were on an equally beautiful face. He was classically handsome – straight nose and chiseled features. His blond hair was brushed back from his tanned face to show off a pair of nice cheekbones covered by a bit of stubble. He had beautiful lips that were upturned in a soft smile. His expressive eyes were squinting in what looked like amusement and Joss could see the laugh lines around them giving him a jovial appearance.

She stepped back to give them space and smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry."

He looked at her appreciatively and smiled wider showing off a set of straight white teeth as he replied, "I'm not."

Joss could feel herself blushing as she looked down and looked back up at him. She knew she needed to make an exit. "I didn't see you there. Sorry again. Excuse me," she moved around him and walked away towards the direction of the party lost in her thoughts about the phone call with John, not knowing that the handsome man she bumped into was watching her walk away in interest.

Ethan couldn't help but admire the sway of her hips that was emphasized by the playful movement of the white sundress she wore. He smiled as she turned the corner of the trail following the path back to the party. Nope, he wasn't sorry at all. The only thing he was sorry about was not getting the name of the raven haired beauty with the large brown eyes, full bow shaped lips, and caramel toned skin.

He wondered if her skin would be as sweet as it looked as he imagined tasting her neck while her shapely legs were wrapped around him as he made love to her. He shook his head out of the fantasy and went in the same direction of the mysterious woman that unknowingly captured his interest, almost forgetting about what brought him over here in the first place. He wanted to bring her back to this trail to walk with her and talk to her. It was such a perfect setting for someone as beautiful as her. A beauty surrounded by beauty.

Just as he was about to turn the corner and follow the beautiful stranger, he saw the man he was supposed to meet. He inwardly groaned because he knew that he would be delayed in his new mission to find out who she was and ask her out.

"Mr. Bradley! Nice party you have here. A little fancy for a company picnic, but the barbecue looks delicious. I'll have to make myself a plate before I leave."

"Special Agent Burke," Ethan dryly replied. "I can enthusiastically say with all honesty that you are the last person I want to see right now. As far as the picnic goes, this is for my employees. They work hard for my company and if I go a little over the top to show my appreciation for their efforts, so be it."

"I see," Burke replied, studying Ethan trying to figure him out.

Ethan walked toward the small bench along the path and Agent Burke followed behind him. After both men took a seat and settled back into the bench, Ethan spoke. "I've been very cooperative so far in your investigation so I'm wondering why you've followed me here to Atlanta. What is it that couldn't wait until my return to New York?"

"Well, it's come to our attention that your subsidiary company, Hanover-Stevens Financial, isn't only involved in the Ponzi scheme that we're investigating, but also appears to also be a source of money laundering for the Russian mafia based in New York."

Looking straight ahead at the pink and red azaleas, Ethan replied. "Yes, I'm aware of it because an employee, Leon Tao, brought it to my attention. He made several attempts to warn Roger Milton, the CFO, but his concerns were dismissed and he was brushed off. He came to me directly and I have reason to believe that Mr. Milton may be deeply involved or knows more than he is letting on. That's why we've shut down operations effective immediately," Ethan said remembering the heated meeting he had with the board members a few days ago. They were thoroughly against it, but there were a few members that agreed. Being that he and Gabriel were majority shareholders of the company, the decision was made.

He finally turned to face Agent Burke and continued. "Like I said before, I've been cooperative with the FBI during this investigation and have been nothing but transparent regarding this matter. Even with the new information that has been uncovered. What is it that you want that's so pressing that it couldn't wait until I returned to the city?"

"Mr. Tao was supposed to meet with Agent Jones and Agent Berrigan yesterday, but has gone missing. We're afraid that either he's gone on the run, or worse – the Russian mafia has gotten to him. He was our best witness and claimed to have information that proves the money laundering. I thought that maybe you knew of his whereabouts."

Ethan chuckled and looked at Burke in admonishment. "I'm a very busy man, Agent Burke. In the grand scheme of things, Hanover-Stevens, while it appeared to be a rather valuable personal investment company to acquire at the time, is only a drop in the bucket of an overall multi-billion dollar corporation. With regards to Leon Tao, I do not have time to babysit a grown man who is of little importance to me. While I appreciate him bringing this issue to my attention, the guy is truly a pain in my ass. If Mr. Tao is as crucial to your investigation as you claim, perhaps you should keep a closer eye on him. But, if I should hear from him, I'll be sure to let you know as soon as possible.

"Now if that's all you need," Ethan stood up from the bench. "I have another pressing matter I need to take care of," he said thinking of the beautiful woman that ran into him moments earlier. "You have my number. Use it next time instead of crashing a barbeque without an invite. Until we meet again, Agent Burke." Ethan gave a mock salute and walked in the direction of the party.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

_(2 days ago)_

**_379 Remsen Street Apt 18B, Brooklyn Heights_**

John knocked on the door of the apartment. There was no response so he knocked again, harder. After a few seconds he heard a female voice on the other side of the door as a shadow came over the peephole. "Who is it?"

"Detective Stills. Is Megan or Brian Milton home? I have a few questions regarding the whereabouts of Chloe Richards," he responded as he held the badge close to the peephole.

After a few deadbolts were unlocked and the chain removed, the door opened to reveal a short and petite woman with milky skin, curly auburn hair, and round brown eyes. She looked hopeful as she asked, "So did you find her? Where was she? Why didn't anyone call me?"

"Mrs. Milton?" John inquired.

"Call me Megan, please."

"Megan, your daughter, Chloe hasn't been found yet, but I've been assigned to your case and had a few questions after reading her file."

A look of disappointment covered her delicate features and she looked down at the floor. "Oh, okay. Well, come on in." She opened the door to the apartment and John walked in. It was reasonably sized apartment for this area and was comfortably furnished. "Can I get you something to drink?"

"No, thank you. Is Mr. Milton home?" he asked as he took a seat in the oversized chair in the living area.

"No. Brian is out right now. What did you want to know? When I filed the missing persons report, I told them everything I knew. It's been almost two months and I haven't heard from her or anyone. I check the shelters everyday hoping that I'll find her, because I know the police don't actively look for runaways. I wish I knew why she left. She was such a good kid," Megan replied as she sat down on the couch facing John.

"In your report, your husband said Chloe was a bit of a trouble maker. Do you know if maybe she was involved in anything dangerous? Hanging with the wrong crowd?"

"No. She didn't really have a lot of friends, or not any close ones that I've met. She isn't so much of a trouble maker, but she and Brian never really got along. He would always complain about her smart mouth and how I would never do anything to get her under control. Chloe was a bright girl and I gave her the freedom to express herself as long as I felt it wasn't disrespectful. He always disagreed with that, but that was my choice on how I wanted to raise her." She looked down at her hands pensively.

"How long have you and Brian been married?"

She looked at him and gave a small smile. "We've been married for three years. When Brian and I first started dating, he and Chloe seemed to get along okay. It seems as if their relationship became more strained over the last year."

"What changed?"

"Brian used to have a really good job in construction, but he failed a random drug test and lost his job. So he would stay home more and the longer he was out of a job, the more depressed and bitter he got. It was a strain on everyone, but Chloe especially. We had to sell our house and move from Westchester and found a decent sized place here that was affordable under my income."

"What is it that you do again?"

"I'm a nurse at an assisted living facility."

"And your husband, Brian; is he working again?"

"Well, he picks up odd jobs here and there," she answered, avoiding John's eyes.

He wondered why she felt the need to lie about what her husband does, but pressed forward with his questioning. Looking at an older picture of Chloe on the coffee table in a soccer uniform, he asked, "What were some of Chloe's hobbies? Did she still show an interest in soccer?"

"No," she smiled. "Actually she started showing an interest in business and finance. I would always catch her watching _Mad Money_ on CNBC or something like that. I purchased a few books for her about the financial markets and she seemed to really be into it. Frankly I find that stuff to be boring, but she was fascinated by it. I think she was influenced by her uncle."

"Her uncle?"

"Yeah, Brian's younger brother, Roger. He's a CFO for some company on Wall Street. He even managed to get her an internship type of job there a few months ago. She was really happy about that."

"What about her father? Do you think she went to stay with him? I'm assuming she's from a prior marriage, but I didn't see anything mentioned in the report."

"No, Brian is my first husband. Chloe doesn't know her father. I gave her my last name, my maiden name, Richards."

"Does her biological father know about her? Perhaps he was trying to find her and succeeded?" He asked, grasping for clues.

She shook her head. "No. No, he doesn't know about her. His name is on her birth certificate, but he didn't sign it because I never told him. I was barely 19 years old when I found out I was pregnant. I thought I was in love." She shook her head and smiled as she reminisced. "I foolishly fell for a rich guy during a fling while I worked a summer job in the Hamptons. He was pre-law at Princeton while I was struggling through and barely able to pay for community college. I found out I was pregnant before the end of the summer and broke things off with him. I always wondered if things would be different if I'd told him..."

She looked down at her hands placed on her lap, feelings of regret still lingering from the decision she made long ago. "We came from two very different worlds, it would have never worked. I was literally the girl from the other side of the tracks. His mom would have probably paid me to have an abortion. She never really liked me. She didn't approve of us seeing each other; said it was beneath him to marry 'the help'," she said bitterly.

"Do you think that Chloe would try to find him? Especially if she wasn't getting along with your husband?"

"She always asked about her father, but I would always lie and say I didn't know who her father was. I figured it would be less painful for her to not know about a family who wouldn't want her."

"Who is her father? What's his name?"

She sighed, and reluctantly answered, "His name is Chris Thomas."

She stood up and crossed the room to a small bookshelf to pick up a framed picture of Chloe. It was a recent picture taken at her school. "I just want her to come back home, Detective Stills. I want you to find my baby and bring her back home."

Before John could give his reassurance to her, the door opened and he saw who he assumed was her husband, Brian walk in. He gave John a curious look before glaring at Megan, clearly displeased at having a strange man alone in his home with his wife. He tossed his keys on the kitchen table and made his way over to the small living room. "What the hell is going on here?" He eyed John with suspicion.

John stood and introduced himself. "I'm Detective Stills. I've been assigned to your daughter's case and was here to get a little more info from you and Mrs. Milton."

"_Step-daughter_," he corrected. "I've already given my statement. If that ungrateful brat wants to run away and break her mother's heart, she can stay gone for all I care." His face hardened as he spoke.

Tears ran down Megan's face as she lashed out at Brian. "What is wrong with you? Why would you say that? God, I wish this stupid feud between the two of you would end! I'm so sick of you two arguing. I'm tired of you tearing her down, tearing me down. All your insults… the mood swings. When she comes back-"

"_If_ she comes back," he interrupted in anger.

"_When_ she comes back, it ends. No more! I want my daughter back and if that means _you_ have to leave so be it!" She stormed off to the bedroom, slamming the door behind her.

John stayed silent as he watched all this unfold, and was curious to find out what happened before Chloe ran off and wondered if there was more behind Brian's animosity towards the young girl besides having a smart mouth. Something was off here, and if the machine gave out her number, he had a feeling that her stepfather was the reason she was in danger.

Brian turned to John and looked him up and down. "I think you've seen enough. Show's over. It's time for you to leave."

John's face remained in his usual unemotional mask, but his azure eyes hardened as he moved closer to Brian. In a quiet tone used to garner fear in many of his enemies, he spoke. "Not before you answer a few questions for me, Mr. Milton. In your statement, you said that you got into an argument with Chloe and she said she couldn't stand to be in the same apartment with you. After that little spat with her mother, I can see why. What was the argument about?"

Brian nervously stepped back to put distance between the two of them and averted his eyes. "Hell, I don't remember. Probably something stupid, like doing her chores. Or her smart mouth."

John knew the man was lying and started to close in on the distance between the two of them when the ringing of a cell phone broke the silence and cut through the tension in the room. Brian reached for the phone in his pocket and turned away from John to answer it. While he was preoccupied, John force paired their phones.

"Hey, I can't talk right now. I'll call you back."

Brian quickly ended the call and put the phone back in his pocket. He walked out of the living room to the front door, opening it wide and made a gesture with his arm. "You can see yourself out, Detective. I have nothing more to add and you've overstayed your welcome here."

John walked out of the apartment to the sound of Brian's cell phone's shrill ringtone before the door was slammed shut behind him. He used the cloning app on his phone, to listen in on Brian's conversation as he walked down the hall and made his way out of the apartment building.

* * *

"_I told you that I would call you back. What do you want, Roger?"_

"_Did you find her?"_

"_No. I just got back from following up on a lead we got about the shelter where she's possibly staying, but got nothing."_

"_You need to find her. You were supposed to take care of it last week! If she is able to get that information to the wrong people, everything is going to hell in a hand basket."_

"_Don't put this on me! If you were as smart as you claim to be, some little nosey teenage bitch wouldn't have been able to figure it out. Besides, everything has already gone to hell. You've got the fed's up your ass and I've got the boss on mine. I even have a fucking detective sniffing around the house. He just left. On top of that we still haven't found her and now we've got to look for the jackass you couldn't control."_

"_I told you I hacked his email and saw communication between the two of them. What happened during the meet up? The plan was for you and those idiot goons of yours to take the both of them. How in the hell could you have let him get away?"_

"_I guess Chloe got spooked and decided against meeting up with him, so they guys took him instead. I didn't stay there because I went out to try to see if some of those street kids would give up her location. When I returned, it was pure mayhem. They told me some asshole in a suit busted up the party. Just when the guys were about to get some answers about how much he knew, this mystery guy rolls in there like Batman or something. Two of them had to go to the hospital for getting shot in the kneecaps."_

"_You've got to be fucking kidding me. That's their story? You actually believe that? Some mystery guy takes on a room full of men?"_

"_Well, we need to find her, and find her fast. They've shut down operations at the company here and no one is allowed in the building."_

"_Can they do that?"_

"_They can when the co-founders of the parent company strong arm the board of directors into shutting it down and opening all the books for the feds."_

"_Shit….shit, shit, shit! I gotta tell the boss about this. I gotta tell him what's going on or my ass is grass!"_

"_Brian, don't do anything stupid! Your idiocy has gotten us into enough trouble as it is."_

John tapped his earpiece after the conversation ended. "Finch?"

"Yes, Mr. Reese."

"I need you to look up a Roger Milton."

"Of course. Any reason why?"

"He's Chloe's uncle and she used to intern at the company he works for. I think there's more to this than her being just a runaway. I'm going to hit the streets and see if I have better luck locating her than her stepfather. I also have a call to make…" John disconnected his call with Finch, and looked in his contacts for another number and hit send.

"Hey, John buddy! I promise I've been staying out of trouble."

"Leon, exactly _who_ were you meeting last week?"

* * *

_(6 days ago)_

"Let me know if she calls," John replied and walked away leaving Fusco standing alone in the empty warehouse.

He walked out of the warehouse and back towards Fusco's squad car. He pulled out his phone once again to call Joss' new number. It rang twice before going to her voicemail. He huffed in frustration and dialed her number again. This time it went directly to voicemail. She turned off her phone. He took slow, deep breaths to quell his rising anger. He should be worried, but he knew she had to be somewhere safe. He just couldn't understand why she wouldn't tell him where she was. Why keep that from him when all he wanted to do was help her? So many questions ran through his mind.

Why didn't she tell him about her plans to rescue Elias? Why was she avoiding his calls? Why did she take off? What was she so angry with him about? He replayed the previous conversations they had before she left town in his mind. _"How do I look, John?... I've been better, but look that can wait."_

He knew she was having a hard time dealing with trying solve Beecher's and Szymanski's murders. He knew she went to dig up Stills' body. He knew he was a jerk to her when she called for help before she did it. It was his mess to clean up, and he should have been the one to do it. Not Joss. He was too busy trying to avenge Dr. Nelson's impending death for it to matter. But even though her moving Stills' body was never directly addressed, she seemed okay. Well, maybe not okay. Sad, hurt, even defeated, but not angry. Not angry like this. _"I didn't ask you to clean up my mess. And don't you dare chastise me for my actions. You don't have that right, not after…"_ She was pushing him away. Why?

He was interrupted from his brooding by a phone call from Finch. He tapped his earwig to answer the call and watched Fusco as he walked back to the car.

"Yeah, Finch?"

Finch could hear the irritation in John's voice, but decided against commenting on it. He'd overheard the heated conversation between John and Detective Carter and knew the reason for his surly mood. He pushed forward with the reason for his call.

"Mr. Reese, Leon Tao's number has come up again. I am unable to track his latest location because I've lost the signal for his phone. However, the last bit of activity on his tracker showed him at Prospect Park about 30 minutes ago."

John sighed. "Finch, this is the fourth time in five months. I'm really getting tired of his antics."

"As am I, but the machine has given us his number so he's still getting into trouble. After reviewing the surveillance footage at the park, it appears that he was waiting for someone, and was ambushed by a group of men. I need Detective Fusco to run the license plate number I was able to get from the van they threw him in. That way, I'll be able to track the owner and we can find out where Leon could be."

John disconnected the call and got in the car, gearing up to get Leon out of yet another sticky situation.

* * *

Joss walked back to the party in a hurry, the handsome green eyed stranger far from her mind as she was consumed with anger about the argument with the blue eyed vigilante at home. She knew she needed to keep her cool and was desperately trying to push down her anger at John. _How dare he demand that I give him my location? As if he doesn't already know where I am. Cleaning up my mess? What an asshole!_

Joss couldn't help but remember that night she called John to find out what he was doing to help Fusco. He brushed her off, telling her he was busy. Busy doing God knows what, but busy nonetheless. Then he gave her some very bitter food for thought before ending the call. _"Once a dirty cop, always a dirty cop, right?"_

He threw it back in her face. If only he knew how those words were now haunting her during her self-introspection. She was a dirty cop now, whether she was helping her friends or not. In a black and white world, she was a dirty cop who broke laws, but she knew that her world was no longer black and white. She was wallowing and losing herself in the muddy shades of gray.

She took a deep breath and slowly blew it out as she took a look around the party area to look for Janice. She'd had enough of letting John get to her. She was determined to take Janice's advice. She would leave her issues from home─ at home. She would make an attempt to distract herself and try to have some fun.

Once she spotted her, she made her way over to the table in the center. _Of course she'd find the table in the center_, Joss thought. _She has to be the center of attention and place herself in the center of everyone's business._

Janice was busy gossiping with an older brunette woman sitting at the table next to her and looked up to see Joss walking back from the azalea trail. _Uh oh_, she thought. _That phone call must have been a doozy. Joss looks ready to spit fire._ She turned to the woman next to her and politely excused herself, stood up, and met Joss halfway.

"Everything okay, Joss?"

It was almost as if she didn't hear her. She turned to Janice and blinked a few times before it seemed as if the question finally registered. "Yeah, it's fine. I'm fine," she replied tersely.

"Yeah, right. Jossy, I told you to leave whatever it is that's going on at home─ at home. We're here to have a good time. Let's try to have some fun. Come on; let me introduce you to a few people. I'm gonna introduce you to Louise. She's the company gossip. Knows everything about everybody. She's a trip."

"So she's just like you, huh?" Joss asked with a smirk.

Janice laughed. "No. She's _worse_."

* * *

"Now if that's all you need," Ethan stood up from the bench. "I have another pressing matter I need to take care of," he said thinking of the beautiful woman that ran into him moments earlier. "You have my number. Use it next time instead of crashing a barbeque without an invite. Until we meet again, Agent Burke." Ethan gave a mock salute and walked in the direction of the party.

Ethan walked the trail back to the entertaining area where the tables were set up and scanned the area, looking for the mysterious beauty. He looked around and saw her sitting at a table with Janice, Gabriel's fiancé. _So she came here with Janice_, he thought. _That might be a problem._ He was hesitant to move forward after that, but he saw her laugh and smile. A genuine smile that exposed the most adorable dimples and made her eyes sparkle. He wondered what was said to produce such a reaction as his initial concerns about Janice poisoning the well were no longer a barrier keeping him from finding out who she was. Just as he began to walk over to their table, he felt a hand grab his arm.

"Hey, what was that all about with the FBI agent? What did he want?" Gabriel asked in a hushed tone.

Ethan turned to Gabe and saw lines of worry and concern across his face. He sighed. It seemed like he would be delayed in meeting the mystery woman once again. Or would this be a good opportunity to get some information? Hmm... time to discuss business first.

"That was Agent Burke coming down here for free food and to hassle me for the hell of it. Leon Tao has gone missing. He was supposed to meet with two other agents working on the case at the NY headquarters. It appears that he may have obtained some evidence that can prove that there _actually was_ money laundering going on with some of those accounts."

"Jesus Christ... So it's true? No longer speculation?" Gabe asked in exasperation.

"Looks like it," Ethan replied with a deep frown.

"And what exactly did he expect you to do?"

"He thought I would know where Leon is or if I'd heard from him."

"Have you?" Gabe questioned, with uncertainty in his eyes.

Ethan looked at Gabe incredulously. "Of course not. I'm ready to get the Feds off my back so we can get back to business. That company has gone from a cash cow to a money pit, so they need to find whatever it is they're looking for so that we can cut our losses." He was almost insulted that Gabriel would think so low of him. Sure he'd done some rather ethically questionable things in his past as they were getting their business off the ground, but nothing he ever did was illegal.

Ethan looked over to the table where Janice was still sitting with the mystery woman. Janice seemed to be chattering away with the company gossip, Louise. Her smile was gone now and she appeared to be bored yet deep in thought about something.

"Gabe, who's the woman with Janice?" he asked still looking at the woman, hoping to catch her glance his way. Hoping to make a connection with her, even from a distance. She finally looked his way and he caught her eyes. She turned her head a bit to the left and a brief smile crossed her features. She looked away and focused her attention on Janice.

"Ohhh no, Ethan," Gabe replied, shaking his head.

"What?" he asked nonchalantly.

"No. That's Janice's cousin. Just drop it."

"So they're related. Okay. What's her name?"

"Why?"

"Because I want to know. Who is she?"

Gabe sighed. He thought this was a bad idea, but when Ethan had his mind set on something, he never backed down or gave up. He was rather tenacious in that way. His ambition and drive is a factor that helped them become very wealthy. His unwillingness to give in when things looked tough is what got him mostly everything he set his mind on. Gabe decided against putting up a fight and only hoped that Janice would give her a heads up to his rather doggish dating ways. "Her name is Jocelyn. She's down here from New York visiting Jan for a few days."

Ethan looked back at the table and mentally willed Jocelyn to look his way again, to no avail. He turned back to Gabe to face him, giving his full attention. "When does she leave?"

"Sunday. I think Jan told me she's leaving Sunday."

* * *

Janice led Joss to the table where she was seated earlier and introduced her to Louise.

"Louise, this is my cousin Jocelyn Carter. Jocelyn, this is Louise Miller. She's a liaison between the Atlanta branch and the newly opened London location."

"It's nice to meet you, Louise," Jocelyn said as she shook the woman's hand.

"Why, the pleasure is all mine," Louise drawled with a smile. Her accent was over the top and reminded Joss of the Blanche Devereaux character on _The Golden Girls_. "You're just as pretty as Janice, here. Hopefully not as much as a troublemaker," she said with a wink, her eyes twinkling in amusement.

Janice feigned displeasure at Louise's comment and responded, "I'm insulted! I'm not a troublemaker. I simply observe from the sidelines and provide necessary commentary to the parties involved."

Joss and Louise exchanged looks and shared a knowing laugh. Joss was finally able to have her first smile since they'd arrived at the gardens and relaxed a bit as Janice and Louise began to gossip about the people at the party. However, the feeling was short lived. She felt her thoughts turning back to the argument she had with John earlier, but then gave herself a mental shake and abruptly tuned out those thoughts in order to observe her surroundings and people watch. As she scanned the area, she spotted the man she ran into before, locking eyes with him as he held her gaze.

She turned her head to the side a bit and gave him a small smile. _He's cute. Who are you kidding, Joss? He's gorgeous_, she thought to herself. She noticed he was standing next to Janice's fiancé and wondered how they knew each other. She felt a nudge to her side and turned to see Janice smirking at her.

"What? Where's Louise?" she asked, noticing the seat next to Janice was now unoccupied.

"She left to go gossip with Diane even though she can't _stand_ Diane. But enough about her, let's talk about you. What's with you giving Ethan the googly eyes?"

"Who?" _So his name is Ethan_, she thought.

"Don't play coy with me, Joss. That man is staring at you like you're something good to eat. And you don't seem to mind. Now, I'm not gonna get in your business or anything," she said as Joss shot her a look, "but just be careful with him. He's a 3-F kinda guy."

"3-F?"

"Flirt, fuck, and forget. He's a known player, so if you're interested you need to know what you'll be dealing with upfront," she said casually as if she was discussing the weather. She took a sip of her sweet tea and looked at Joss before diverting her eyes to see Ethan in what appeared to be a deep discussion with Gabriel. She was pretty sure that Ethan was getting the 411 on Joss as well. She smirked as she looked back at Joss who seemed to be mulling over this new information.

"How do you know this about him?" she finally asked. She was almost done making up her mind whether or not she would pursue this fling, casual greeting, or whatever it was she would have with Ethan. She decided earlier that she would try to have a good time while she was here, why not have a fun, fine, and fuckable distraction while she was at it? She smiled inwardly at the thought. _I got your three F's Janice_.

"Ethan is Gabe's best friend and business partner. They started the company together."

"Hmm…"

Janice could see the wheels turning in Joss' head and wondered where this would lead. She wasn't sure if she should talk her out of it or convince her to cut loose with a man knowing there would be no strings attached. She suddenly thought about Joss' list and made her decision. "You know what, Jossy-bear?"

"What?"

"You should go for it. Have some fun and stop being a stick in the mud. He could be your number 18," she said with all seriousness.

"My what?" Joss asked in confusion.

"Number 18. On your list."

Joss stared at Janice blankly, not understanding what she meant. "What list?"

"You know… the list. From last night."

Realization finally dawned on her and she instantly remembered the ridiculous list she wrote last night while she was heavily under the influence of one too many margaritas. She chuckled and shook her head. "I only wrote that list to appease you, Jan. I'm not doing anything on that list."

"Sure you are. And you need to do number 18. I mean, look at him Joss. He's fun, fine, and fuckable." Joss couldn't help but laugh as Janice said her earlier thoughts aloud. "He's a terrific choice if you want to get laid with no strings attached. When's the last time you got some? When's the last time you got the big O?" Janice asked with a toothy grin.

Joss rolled her eyes at Janice's attempt to rile her. "Like I said, I'm not doing anything on that list."

Janice shrugged her shoulders. "Okay, Joss. To each his own." She spotted the event planner of the gardens waving to get her attention. This woman had been badgering her about having her wedding here, but Janice had repeatedly turned her down. However, she thought it would be nice to have a bridal shower here, so she stood to go meet the woman and have a talk with her. Before she left the table, she turned to Joss. "I see someone I need to talk to, I'll be back in a bit. You good?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine Jan," Joss replied as she looked back over to where Ethan was only to discover that he was no longer standing there. She watched Jan walk towards the event planner, unaware of an older man taking a seat next to her.

"Hello there."

Joss turned to face an elderly man with stark white hair and light blue eyes. He had a soft smile and a friendly disposition.

"Hello," she responded with a polite smile.

"I don't believe I've ever seen you at one of these events before. Are you here from the New York location?"

"No, actually I'm here as a guest. But I am visiting from New York."

"New York is a beautiful city. I was there last year birding and was amazed at how many different birds I spotted in Central Park alone..."

The silver haired man continued to drone on and on about bird watching and big years and other nonsense that Joss could care less about. But she nodded her head during all the right pauses and chuckled when appropriate during his less than funny jokes. She felt as if she would die of boredom if Janice didn't hurry back.

"... I love birds. Who doesn't love birds? Sure, they'll wake you up in the morning, or ruin the fruit in your garden. And sometimes, of course, they'll crap on your car. But they're beautiful, and they fly, and they're capable of incredible things."

Joss managed to keep her smirk at bay as she thought about Finch and his different bird aliases. _No, no, no, Joss. You will NOT think about any of them._ Before Joss could excuse herself from the overly talkative man, she felt a large hand cover hers and an arm around her waist as the handsome stranger─ now known to her as Ethan─ sat in the unoccupied seat Janice vacated moments earlier.

"Jocelyn, darlin' is Chitter Chatter Charlie here boring you with innocuous facts about the tufted titmouse or the... what is now? The _chickadee_?" he asked with a brief glance towards older gentleman before focusing all of his attention on Joss.

Caught off guard at his brazen approach of invading her personal space and touching her with a familiarity not yet granted to him, she simply glared at him and responded with a tight smile. "Actually, Ethan, he was telling me about the sooty shearwater of Tazmania."

She saw the amusement in his eyes mixed with smug satisfaction because she already knew his name; which let him know that she was at least somewhat interested. That and the fact that she didn't slap him for being too touchy feely. He gave her a megawatt smile and turned on the charm.

"Charles thank you for keeping this beautiful lady company for me," he said to the sweet bird watching man, while looking directly at Joss.

Charlie chuckled at the two of them. He may be an avid birder, but he also people watched and he was able to read body language. He could feel the tension coming off the pretty young lady in waves as she shot daggers at Ethan with her eyes. But just as quickly he sensed a shift in her attitude. She continued to allow him to keep his hands on her and looked like she could kiss him and then slap him. _Interesting..._

"So how did you two meet?"

Joss turned to Charlie to see if he was serious. He couldn't possibly believe they were a couple.

Ethan gave a crooked grin and slid his hand from around her waist and up her back rest below her neck as his thumb caressed the nape of her neck. She didn't move but she turned to face Ethan again and gave him another look of disapproval at his need to touch her.

"When Jocelyn and I ran into each other, she nearly knocked me off my feet. She didn't even have the decency to apologize. Lucky for her I'm a forgiving man, and it doesn't hurt that she's absolutely stunning," he drawled; his eyes twinkling with laughter at his version of events versus how they actually met.

With a smirk, Joss replied, "I don't believe it quite happened that way. I remember apologizing. I actually said sorry twice." She removed her right hand from under his and went to gently touch his face. If he wanted to play this game, so would she. "Don't you remember?" she asked softly.

He lifted the hand rubbing her neck to grasp her hand and held it to his face for a brief moment before placing a soft kiss on the inside of her wrist and holding it in his lap. "Is that how it happened? I don't remember it going quite that way, but if you insist..."

In her mind, Joss knew that this man would be bad news for her. Everything about him screamed playboy from the moment he sat down next to her as if he was her date. Not only that, but she couldn't help but hear Janice's warning ringing in her ears. _"He's a 3-F kinda guy. Flirt, fuck, and forget. He's a known player…"_ She may have decided to let go and have a little fun, and maybe even have a nice little fling as a distraction. Now that the opportunity had presented itself, she had doubts. She knew she that there needed to be distance between them because although her mind and maybe even her heart was saying no, the way he looked at her with full attention and admiration, the way he touched her with sensuality and tenderness, made her once dormant hormones wake up and shout yes.

They continued to look at each other with intense interest until Charlie broke the spell. He cleared his throat and continued to pry. "So Ethan, have you taken Jocelyn here to the azalea gardens? It's a very beautiful and romantic setting for you two lovebirds."

"Lovebirds?" Joss asked with slight irritation.

"Well sure, I recognize lovebirds when I see them, too," Charlie replied with a chuckle.

"Charlie, I think you have the wrong idea. Ethan and I-"

"Were just about to go to the gardens. He's right sweetheart, we should take a walk down the trail. The flowers are in bloom and I think you'll enjoy it," Ethan said, finishing her sentence for her. He stood up and pulled Joss' chair from the table, taking her hand as she stood up. "Nice seeing you again, Charlie. We'll catch up later."

"Of course, Ethan. Take care. It was nice to meet you Jocelyn."

"It was nice meeting you too, Charlie."

She allowed Ethan to lead her away from the table to the outskirts of the party area before she stopped walking. He turned to face her to see why she was no longer walking with him.

"Is there a problem, Jocelyn?"

"No. There's no problem. I appreciate you saving me from… Chatterbox Charlie?"

"Chitter Chatter Charlie," he answered with a smirk.

"Whatever. I appreciate you saving me from death by boredom, but I'm going to try to find Janice."

"What about our walk?"

"What about it? I'm sorry Ethan, but I'm not interested. I tend to stay away from arrogant men with too much ego." She was proud of herself. She knew she made the right decision. Her mind and heart were happy, but those pesky hormones… or was it pheromones? She needed to put distance between them and she needed to do it as soon as possible.

He smirked and replied, "We have something in common because I tend to stay away from those guys, too."

Joss sighed and rolled her eyes. "Nice knowing you, Ethan." She turned to walk back towards the direction of the party.

"Jocelyn, wait." She turned around to face him.

"I'm sorry. I was simply trying to break the ice. Maybe even get a smile. There was a time when that line used to work." He stepped closer to her and gently took her hand. "Come on, just a walk. We can talk and actually have a real introduction. Just me and you."

She gave a small smile in spite of herself. "Just a walk?"

"There's a hint of that beautiful smile. Yes, just a walk."

She looked down to see his hand still holding hers. She looked back up and saw the sincerity in his eyes. _It's just a walk, not a marriage proposal._

"Okay."


End file.
